APRIL 11, 2025

HARTFORD, CONNECTICUT
XL ARENA

 

 

The fireworks go off in XL Arena as Muse "Madness" plays over the speakers.

 

 

Colin: Welcome Welcome WELCOME to the final MAWL MADNESS before Taxiderby. I'm Colin McRae, here with Kendra Mavis and Arvin Wallace-Jones. We were supposed to know who is scheduled to fight Balor Wolfe for the Mania Title, but that ended in controversy.

 

 

Kendra: We're meant to find out this week what Elisa Mae has in store for 50 Cent and WildFire. 

 

 

Arvin: And we're going to fill in the rest of the Taxiderby card as we go into battle. 

 

Colin: And it all starts right now with this match between our champion and the man who may be facing him if he holds the belt to Fallout! We take it over to Ash.

 

BALOR WOLFE VS KID KROSS

 

Ding ding ding!

 

 

Ash: The following contest is scheduled for one fall!

 

 

The lights suddenly cut out for a brief moment and explode and strobe to the heavy riff of Soundgarden’s Outshined. The crowd is on their feet in support of the Kid they identify with. The Hometown Hero and the Kross town Rival. Twisted Kid Kross. 

 

 

Announcer: "Ladies and gentlemen, from the depths of despair and depravity of Sunnyvale Trailer Park, in Sunnyvale Nova Scotia Canada, weighing in at 230 pounds, your hometown hero and their cross town rival, Twisted Kiiiiiddddd Kross!! 

 

Kid Kross saunters down to the ring with his flashy blue and green vest with a facial depiction of “the green bastard”, a local Sunnyvale wrestler. He has his aviators on carrying a hockey stick over his shoulder. His long hair flowing behind him. Kid Kross kneels down In the ring with his arms out to the side as the music hits the chorus “ Show me the power child I’d like to say, that I’m down on my knees today”. He pops back up when the lyrics say “it gives the butterflies, gives me away until I’m up on my feet again”. He climbs to the second rope and raises his stick in unison with “OUTSHINED, OUTSHINED, OUTSHINED, OUTSHINED!” 

 

Ash: "Kid Kross!, the one we’ve all been waiting for! He’s here to take  professional wrestling by storm!"

 

Kid Kross stares intently at the curtain awaiting his next challenge. Ready to prove himself to his fans and the rest of the wrestling world.

 

 

📢 [Arena Lights Cut to Black – A Single Spotlight Flickers at the Top of the Ramp]

 

🎵 "Show me how to lie, you're getting better all the time..."

 

📢 [Arena Lights Cut to Black – A Single Spotlight Flickers at the Top of the Ramp]

 

🎵 "Show me how to lie, you're getting better all the time..."

 

💜 (SYNC MOMENT: The first guitar riff hits, and a purple and white strobe light pulses to life, illuminating a lone figure sitting cross-legged at the top of the stage. His dog mask conceals his face, head bowed in stillness.)

 

 

🔥 The anticipation builds, the energy thick in the air as the crowd stirs.

🎵 "And turning all against the one, is an art that's hard to teach..."

 

📢 Ash:
"And his opponent... accompanied to the ring by his muse, Eros, and The Radio Demon, Alastor…

 

🔥 The tension stretches for just a moment longer—

 

📢 "From Sydney, Australia... weighing in at 230 pounds...
HE IS THE MAWL MANIA CHAMPION…
THE CHAMPION OF THE GODS... BALOR WOLFE!!"

 

🎵 "Another clever word sets off an unsuspecting herd..."

 

💜 (SYNC MOMENT: As the bass kicks in, Balor’s fingers twitch. Then—suddenly—he lifts his head, his piercing gaze visible beneath the mask. The camera zooms in, capturing the eerie calm before the storm.)

 

🎵 "And as you step back into line, a mob jumps to their feet..."

 

 

🔥 (SYNC MOMENT: The beat drops—Eros steps forward, placing a hand on Balor’s shoulder before gently removing his mask. The crowd erupts as Balor’s platinum blonde hair and lip rings gleam under the lights. The transformation is complete.)

 

🎵 "Now dance, fucker, dance—man, he never had a chance!"

 

 

🔥 (Alastor steps beside Balor, his grin devilish. With an exaggerated flourish, he presents the MAWL MANIA Championship belt. Balor grips it tightly, raising it high as the crowd roars in approval.)

 

🎵 "You're gonna go far, kid!"

 

💜 (SYNC MOMENT: Balor stops mid-ramp, running a hand through his hair, exhaling sharply before suddenly sprinting forward, his focus locked in.)

 

🔥 (He leaps onto the apron in a single bound, gripping the ropes as he surveys the crowd.)

 

💥 (SYNC MOMENT: Balor springboards clean over the top rope, landing effortlessly in the center of the ring, the championship belt never leaving his grasp.)

 

🎵 "When you walk away, nothing more to say..."

 

🔥 (As the second verse begins, Balor ascends the turnbuckle, standing tall, arms outstretched, the MAWL MANIA Championship still in his right hand. His eyes close, absorbing the moment.)

 

📢 (Then—just as the second "You're gonna go far, kid!" hits—the music CUTS. The arena is plunged into silence.)

 

⏳ A breath. A pause. Then—

 

💜 (SYNC MOMENT: The crowd takes over, roaring the chorus in unison.)

 

🎵 "With a thousand lies and a good disguise
Hit 'em right between the eyes
Hit 'em right between the eyes!"

 

🔥 (SYNC MOMENT: Balor remains frozen, standing on the turnbuckle, letting the crowd’s deafening energy wash over him. Then, with a slow, deliberate motion, he drops down, pacing toward the center of the ring, his smirk just barely visible.)

 

📢 The lights flicker back to normal—Balor remains still, his focus razor-sharp. He slowly approaches Eros and hands him the championship. Eros takes the belt with a nod, holding it as Balor calmly sits cross-legged in the corner, waiting... watching... ready for battle.

 

Colin McRae: “Bell sounds, and this one is underway—non-title bout, but the tension? Oh, it’s thick, folks.”

 

Kendra Mavis: “Balor’s got that focused look tonight. You can feel it. Kid Kross is gonna have to earn every inch.”

 

Arvin Wallace: “Or just take it. Kross ain’t playing chess, he’s swinging a bat in the middle of a library. Balor’s gonna feel it.”

 

The two circle, then lock up hard. Wolfe muscles Kross down to a knee, transitions behind, waistlock takedown! Kross scrambles but Wolfe floats over into a headlock, squeezing tight. Kross tries to stand—Balor wrenches it tighter and pulls him back down.

 

Colin: “Textbook chain wrestling here from Wolfe—he’s a master of control.”

 

Kendra: “It’s like watching a surgeon with a scalpel.”

 

Balor lets Kross up, only to snap him down with a quick arm drag. Kross slaps the mat in frustration. Balor stays poised, bouncing lightly on his feet. They tie up again—this time, Wolfe slides under with a drop toe hold, floats over again, and grinds in a front chancery.

 

Arvin: “He’s stalling. He’s scared of getting hit, so he’s slowing it down.”

 

Kendra: “He’s wrestling, Arvin. There’s a difference.”

 

Wolfe transitions into a hammerlock, then shoves Kross chest-first into the corner—rolls him up on the rebound!

 

1!

2!

 

Kross kicks out! He rolls to the outside, frustrated, jawing with fans.

 

Colin: “Almost stole it there! Balor’s showing that championship-level mat game.”

 

Camera briefly cuts to Alastor at the booth, silent. His red eyes track Balor calmly.

 

Colin: “Alastor, you’re watching your… protégé closely tonight.”

 

Alastor: (low, composed) “Mm. Precision… is power. And Balor? He bleeds it.”

 

Kross slides back in. Wolfe greets him with a stiff chop—SMACK!—echoes through the arena. The crowd lights up. Balor whips Kross into the ropes—leapfrog—then a big running back elbow takes Kross down!

 

Colin: “Shotgun elbow right to the face!”

 

Balor grabs Kross again—snap suplex! Kross bounces hard. Wolfe keeps hold, rolls through—second snap suplex! Crowd roars louder.

 

Kendra: “Ohh! Wolfe’s not just dominating—he’s stringing it together!”

 

Arvin: “And giving Kross time to get pissed off. He better put this away quick.”

 

Balor stalks Kross, looking for a fisherman’s buster—hooks the leg—but Kross fights out with elbows, shoves him into the ropes—and just as Wolfe rebounds—Kross gouges the eyes with the heel of his palm!

 

Kendra: “Ugh! That’s dirty! Come on, ref!”

 

Colin: “He caught him right in the eyes—the ref was out of position!”

 

Kross follows up—hooks the head—Draping Swinging Neckbreaker! He calls it the “Halifax Hangover!” Wolfe crashes neck-first into the mat.

 

Colin: “OH! Big move—Halifax Hangover connects!”

 

1!

2!

 

Kendra: “No! Kickout from Wolfe!”

 

Kross snarls, now in full control. He stomps Wolfe’s ribs, presses a boot into his throat until the ref counts four. Eros paces ringside, shouting encouragement.

 

Alastor still hasn’t moved. Just one small grin.

 

Alastor: “Mm. Let the pain come. It’s how he grows.”

 

Colin: “Alastor… you sound almost pleased he’s in trouble.”

 

Alastor: “Oh, I am. We all need our crucibles.”

 

Kross pulls Balor up by the hair—slaps him across the face!

 

Arvin: “THAT’S what I like. No fear. No respect. Just violence.”

 

Balor staggers, eyes still blurry from the rake. Kross scoops him—gutbuster across the knee! Wolfe writhes, holding his ribs.

 

Colin: “Kid Kross turning this match on its head—dirty tactics and high impact offense!”

 

Kross leans over the ropes, yelling at the crowd who are now chanting: “LET’S GO WOLFE!” louder than ever. Kross spits to the side, sneering.

 

Kendra: “The crowd is still behind Balor! They know he’s got fight left!”

 

Kross drags Balor up again, this time into a standing arm trap neck crank, wrenching his neck with his forearm pressing down across the collarbone. Wolfe groans in pain.

 

Ref: “Do you give up?!”

 

Wolfe snarls, shaking his head, as the crowd starts clapping in rhythm.

 

Colin McRae: “Balor Wolfe still stuck in that vicious neck crank, and Kid Kross is just grinding it in, squeezing every ounce of oxygen from the Champion.”

 

Kendra Mavis: “But look—Balor’s fighting it! He’s shifting his weight—trying to stand!”

 

Wolfe lets out a guttural yell as he surges to his feet, lifting Kross off the mat with raw strength. The crowd’s clapping picks up tempo—

 

Colin: “Ohhh, here we go! Balor’s not out of this!”

 

With a sharp shift of momentum, Wolfe drives Kross back-first into the corner! The hold breaks! The crowd pops!

 

Arvin Wallace: “He broke it with a desperation slam! That’s pure survival instinct!”

 

Kross stumbles forward—Balor explodes out of the corner with a running lariat! Kross flips inside out!

 

Colin: “Down goes Kross! LARIAT THAT NEARLY TOOK HIS HEAD OFF!”

 

Balor doesn’t stop—he hits the ropes—running body block sends Kross skidding across the mat!

 

Kendra: “That’s the power game I was waiting for! Balor’s had enough!”

 

Wolfe pulls Kross up—short-arm clothesline! But he keeps the wrist! Another short-arm clothesline! Kross groans, trying to crawl away. Balor yanks him in again—spinning lariat! Kross crumples!

 

Colin: “That’s THREE brutal shots in a row—and Wolfe is heating up!”

 

Alastor: (calm, admiring) “There’s the fire. Let it burn.”

 

Wolfe stands over Kross, jaw clenched, breath heavy. The usual grin is gone—he looks focused, maybe even angry. He hits the ropes again—leaping senton! CRASH across the chest! Kross gasps for air as Wolfe hooks the leg!

 

1!

2!

 

Kross kicks out!

 

Kendra: “That was almost it! Balor’s mixing speed with that raw power now!”

 

Balor grabs Kross by the arm and flings him into the ropes—on the rebound, POP-UP FLAPJACK! Kross’ chest bounces off the mat hard!

 

Colin: “Kross just bounced like a basketball! Balor’s running wild!”

 

The crowd’s behind Wolfe louder now, chanting “LET’S GO WOLFE!” as he pounds the mat once. He backs into a corner—waiting—stalking. Kross groggily gets to his feet—Balor charges in—

 

—but Kross ducks and yanks Balor forward—LOW DROP TOE HOLD! Wolfe crashes throat-first into the second rope! The ref yells a warning! The crowd immediately starts booing!*

 

Kendra: “Come on! Another cheap shot!”

 

Arvin: “That’s called opportunity, Kendra. Kross creates it.”

 

Kross seizes the moment, slipping outside the ring. Balor is dazed, draped over the middle rope. Kross grabs him from behind—RUNS HIM RIB-FIRST INTO THE RING POST! Balor’s body jerks from the impact as he crashes to the floor!

 

Colin: “OH! Into the steel! Kross just drove Wolfe right into that post!”

 

Eros rushes over to check on Balor, yelling at the ref. Kross just laughs and rolls back into the ring, sitting on one knee, telling the ref to count.

 

Ref:
“One!”
“Two!”
“Three!”
“Four!”

 

Kendra: “Balor’s moving, but that hit to the ribs might’ve done real damage.”

 

Arvin: “This is how you beat the champ—you don’t pin him. You take him out.”

 

Ref:
“Five!”
“Six—”

 

Balor clutches the bottom of the apron, trying to pull himself up, his face twisted in pain.

 

Colin: “He’s still down! And Kross is grinning like a maniac—he wants the countout!”

 

Camera pans briefly to Alastor, who has tilted his head slightly. That ever-present grin returns.

 

Alastor: (softly) “Pain is only delay. Not defeat.”

 

Ref: “Seven!”
“Eight!”

 

Balor Wolfe is draped over the apron, clutching his ribs, fingers digging into the canvas—

 

Colin McRae: “He’s gotta move now! The ref’s at eight!”

 

Kendra Mavis: “Come on, Balor! Don’t let Kross win like this!”

 

Ref: “NINE!”

 

At the last second, Wolfe throws himself under the bottom rope, rolling back into the ring just in time! The crowd erupts!

 

Colin: “HE MADE IT! BALOR WOLFE BEATS THE COUNT!”

 

But Kross is on him instantly—stomping on the ribs, dragging him up with a snarl. He shoves Balor into the corner and unleashes a barrage—
stiff elbows, shoulder thrusts, and a back elbow across the jaw!

 

Arvin Wallace: “Smart! Go right back to the ribs! That’s the weak spot now.”

 

Kross pulls him out of the corner—Snap Suplex! He floats over—hooks the leg!

 

1!

2!

 

Kickout from Wolfe, though slower this time. He gasps for breath. The crowd rallies louder.

 

Kendra: “Balor’s still got something left! That’s the heart of a champion!”

 

Kross grabs his head—cravat knee strikes, each one snapping Balor’s neck back, then whips him to the ropes—Running Kitchen Sink Knee! Balor flips, landing hard.

 

Colin: “Vicious strike! Wolfe is down again!”

 

Kross spreads his arms mockingly, soaking in the boos. He yells, “THIS IS YOUR CHAMPION?!” then backs into the corner, waving his hands like he's lining up a highlight.

 

Arvin: “You better watch this. Kross is going airborne.”

 

Kross climbs to the middle turnbuckle, eyes locked on Wolfe, who’s pulling himself upright slowly. He shouts—“TIME TO FLY!”—and launches—

 

Colin: “DIVING KROSSBODY COMING—”

 

*But Wolfe steps forward and—BOOM!

 

HE CUTS HIM IN HALF MID-AIR WITH A HEART OF THE WOLFE SPEAR!

 

Kross folds in the air like a broken chair. The crowd explodes!

 

Kendra: “HE CAUGHT HIM! HE CAUGHT HIM WITH THE SPEAR!”

 

Colin: “THE HEART OF THE WOLFE OUTTA NOWHERE! KROSS IS DOWN! KROSS IS DOWN!”

 

The camera shakes slightly as the crowd absolutely loses it. Balor, breathing hard, crawls onto one knee, his teeth bared, eyes wild. He rises slowly, walking with a purpose toward the ropes.

 

Kendra: “That fire’s back… oh, look at this crowd! They’re feeling it!”

 

Balor grips the top rope with both hands, head down, as the fans chant his name. The camera cuts briefly to Eros at ringside, pounding the mat. Alastor leans slightly forward at commentary, watching intently.

 

Alastor: (softly, almost pleased) “Let them see what happens when the wolf bares its fangs.”

 

The crowd noise builds—rumbling, rising—as Balor Wolfe stands tall, hands tightening on the ropes, ready to finish what Kross started.

 

The crowd is roaring, standing, hands in the air as Balor Wolfe steps out from the ropes. He turns slowly, his body still aching, but his eyes locked dead on Kross as he starts to stir.

 

Colin McRae: “Oh, you can feel it now! Balor Wolfe’s got that look in his eyes again!”

 

Kendra Mavis: “He’s calling his shot!”

 

Wolfe raises both hands above his head, pressing his palms together with calm precision—
The Lights Out Taunt.

 

He rests his cheek gently on his clasped hands, never looking away from Kross, who’s on his knees and dazed. The fans react instantly—cheering, shouting, camera flashes going off.

 

Colin: “There it is! The Lights Out signal! And Kid Kross has no idea the end is about to crash down on him!”

 

Arvin Wallace: “He should’ve finished the job outside. You give Balor one second—just one—and this is what you get!”

 

Balor slowly lowers his hands, the calm before the storm fading into sharp intent. He marches forward, yanks Kross off the mat, and throws him up onto his shoulders in a fireman’s carry—

 

Kendra: “He’s going for it—Lights Out—”

 

—but Kross rakes the eyes!

 

Colin: “No! Not again! Kross with the eyes—desperation move!”

 

Balor stumbles blindly, and Kross slips down behind him—snap reverse slam! Wolfe crashes face-first onto the canvas!

 

Arvin: “Brilliant! That’s how you fight a champion—you find the cracks!”

 

Kross scrambles to his feet, arms flailing as he rushes to the top rope.

 

Colin: “He’s going up again—Kross is looking for a moonsault!”

 

Kross stands high, facing away from the ring. He raises both arms like a dark angel, then pivots on the ropes—

Kendra: “Wait—he didn’t see—”

 

*—and LEAPS with a picture-perfect moonsault—

 

Colin: “NO—BALOR’S UP—HE’S STANDING—”

 

—AND WOLFE CATCHES HIM MID-AIR onto his shoulders like it’s instinct. The crowd explodes. Kross’s eyes go wide—

 

Kendra: “HE CAUGHT HIM! HE CAUGHT HIM FOR LIGHTS OUT!”

 

Balor transitions instantly, shoving Kross off—KNEE TO THE JAW! The sound echoes like a gunshot. Kross drops flat, lifeless.

 

Colin: “LIGHTS OUT! LIGHTS OUT! HE HIT IT!”

 

Balor hooks the leg deep—

 

1!

2!

3!

 

DING DING DING!

 

Balor Wolfe wins by Pinfall!

 

 

Colin McRae: “Unreal! Balor Wolfe catches Kid Kross out of mid-air with Lights Out—and that’s all she wrote!”

 

Kendra Mavis: “You could feel that coming! The moment he stood up during that moonsault setup—I got chills!”

 

Arvin Wallace: “Yeah, yeah, credit where it’s due. But I’ll say it again—Kross had that match in the palm of his hands if not for a couple slip-ups. Balor got lucky.”

 

As Balor Wolfe sits on his knees in the center of the ring, breathing heavy, Eros slides in from ringside, beaming. He doesn’t need to come from backstage—he’s been in Balor’s corner the whole war, clapping, pacing, and shouting encouragement the whole time. Now, he pulls the MAWL Mania Championship off the timekeeper’s table and walks over to his partner.

 

The referee checks on Kid Kross, who’s still groaning on the canvas. With a grimace, the ref helps roll him under the bottom rope. Ringside crew moves to assist as Balor pushes to his feet.

 

Eros steps up and gives him a tight hug, then throws the title belt over Balor’s shoulder with proud flair. The crowd roars as Balor stumbles slightly, gritting his teeth through exhaustion.

 

At the commentary, Alastor quietly rises from his seat. He smiles as if amused by some private joke.

 

Alastor:
“Ladies and gentlemen… I’ve had a wonderful time. But I have a champion to celebrate with.”

 

He walks away with eerie calm, not even removing a headset—because he was never visibly wearing one.

 

Kendra Mavis: “Hold on… did Alastor even have a headset on this whole time?”

 

Colin McRae: “I—I don’t think so?”

 

Arvin Wallace: “I thought I was imagining him at first. The guy doesn’t need a headset—he probably whispers straight into the production truck’s soul.”

 

Kendra: “But we heard him—how were we hearing him?!”

 

In the ring, the lights dim slightly as Alastor steps between the ropes. He approaches Balor and Eros, then dramatically raises his walking stick, revealing a mic built into the top. He holds it out toward Balor like a king presenting a sword.

 

Balor steadies himself, championship over his shoulder, and leans toward the mic. He’s still breathing hard, the fight clearly having pushed him deep. The crowd quiets, waiting.

 

Balor Wolfe (in between sharp breaths):
“It doesn’t matter… who wins between 50 Cent… or WildFire…”

(He pauses and glances toward the camera, his expression sharpening.)

“…‘cause their fate’s gonna be the same… as The Spearhead at Spring Sting… and Kid Kross tonight…”

(He raises his hand and points downward at the mat.)

“…looking up… at the lights.”

 

The crowd explodes into cheers as “You’re Gonna Go Far, Kid” by The Offspring hits once more. Balor smirks, looks straight into the hard cam—and gives a confident, almost playful wink.

 

In the ring, Eros claps behind him, Alastor grins from ear to ear, and Balor raises the title with one hand while the other points to the sky.

 

Colin McRae: “That right there is a champion with a vision. No matter who’s next—it might already be too late.”

 

Kendra Mavis: “And with Eros and Alastor at his side? Radio Silence is building an empire.”

 

Arvin Wallace: “I hope the Mania challenger’s got life insurance. Because the lights are going out.”

 

The crowd erupts as Balor Wolfe steps out of the ring and toward the ramp, championship slung over his shoulder, dog mask hanging from his hip. He puts on his brand-new shirt—his logo on the front with the words “The Man of Prophecy,” and the back reading, “Champion of the Gods and The People.”

 

Balor pauses at the top of the ramp, taking in the cheers before making his way to the ring. Fans reach out for high-fives, and a few already wear his new shirt, which makes him grin.

 

Kendra Mavis (excitedly): "Listen to this reaction! The MAWL Mania Champion has more to say, and these fans are eating it up!"

 

Arvin Wallace (groaning): "Oh great, another night of everyone pretending like this guy is some kind of wrestling messiah. Spare me."

 

Colin McRae: "Arvin, he is the champion, whether you like it or not. And after that wild Six-Pack Challenge last week, we still don’t have a clear challenger. That double pin has left things wide open."

 

Arvin Wallace: "Yeah, and meanwhile, Wolfe here was kicking back in his brand-new bus, watching it all from his throne of smugness!"

 

Kendra Mavis: "Hey, don’t be jealous! He earned that bus, just like he earned that championship!"

 

Balor steps through the ropes, walks to the center of the ring, and raises his championship high as his music fades. The crowd immediately erupts into a loud chant:

 

Crowd: "WOLFE! WOLFE! WOLFE!"

 

He lets them go for a moment, pacing the ring, adjusting the title on his shoulder, and playing with the dog mask on his hip before finally raising the mic.

 

[Balor Wolfe Speaks]

 

"Man, when it comes to me and this championship, something controversial always has to happen, doesn’t it? And for once, I wasn’t even involved this time!"

 

The crowd laughs, and Balor smirks, shaking his head.

 

"All I was doing was sitting in my brand-new bus—oh yeah, got myself an upgrade. You know, when you’re the Man of Prophecy, you gotta ride in style."

 

He tugs at his shirt, grinning.

 

"Speaking of style, you see this? Oh yeah, this little masterpiece is now officially available at the merch stands. So if you wanna support your champ—and really, why wouldn’t you?—go grab one before they sell out."

 

The crowd pops as Balor spreads his arms, soaking in the reaction before getting back to business.

 

"So there I was, feet up, watching the Six-Pack Challenge, waiting to see which poor soul gets the honor of losing to me in a few weeks… and what happens? A double pin! Are you actually kidding me?!"

 

The fans react with groans and laughter.

 

"So what does that mean? 50 Cent and WildFire both win? Alright then, sure, why not! But wait, I can already hear some of you saying—"

 

Balor mimics a whiny, high-pitched voice:
"But Balor, GM Starz has made a match, one-on-one, to determine a true number-one contender!"

 

He rolls his eyes and does sarcastic air quotes.

 

"Yeah, yeah, I know. Another genius and totally original idea from Starz. But come on, folks—this is pro wrestling. When do things ever go according to plan?"

 

The crowd yells “Never!” and Balor nods in agreement.

 

"Exactly! So here’s what’s gonna happen. I’m gonna be sitting right next to my good friend Arvin Wallace—"

 

Balor smirks as the camera cuts to Arvin at the commentary table, who shakes his head in disgust.

 

"—watching this match, giving my two cents when asked. And once it’s all said and done, we’ll find out who gets a date with my knee in three weeks... and trust me, after that, they’re gonna have a real good look at the pretty lights."

 

Balor adjusts the championship on his shoulder and leans against the ropes, still holding the mic as the moment lingers, leaving the door open for anything to happen next…

 

 

Elisa: Now Shug, CN Starz is still laid out in traction after what y’all did to her, bless your hearts. I’m still the actin’ GM in her stead, and the match was my idea. Now I hear y’all don’t like it and honey y’all don’t NEED to! Somethin’ that Leila bless her heart as well didn’t impart to y’all is who runs the rodeo and who’s the clowns.

 

Kendra: Oh damn.

 

Elisa: So here’s what’s gonna happen, honey. Y’all can commentate an’ share yer li’l pearls of Balor Wisdom durin’ the match. Y’all - and by that I mean y’all Balor an’ y’all Radiohead - come even a step close to my ring durin’ this match or think to lay a hand on either competitor, an’ not only will y’all Balor be fightin’ both competitors, I’ll even throw in Magnus as interest. Also, y’all may wanna check yer calendar cuz Taxiderby is closer than y’all think.

 

Colin: Wait…did she say “her” ring?

 

Arvin: I’m sure she meant her like it’s your ring, or my ring, or what have you. 

 

Kendra: I dunno. I didn’t like the way she said that. 

 

Elisa: Now before y’all complain or injure any more of our staff, y’all were gonna have a triple threat at the end o’ all this anyway, cuz the six-pack winner was gonna only be one part of the puzzle an’ then we got our En-DO-Cy-TOE-SIS match woowee Leila thas a mouthful. An’ I’m a graceful bird, so instead o’ havin’ that person added to the match, by the power invested in me I’m bringin’ in a new…to you, old t’me…championship.

 

Colin: Does she have this power?

 

Arvin: She’s acting GM, Colin, of course she does. 

 

Elisa: Now y’all fashion yourselves gods. An’ the only thing that matches a god…is a titan.

 

(The crowd murmurs)

 

Elisa: Don’t think cuz I’m a li’l Southern girl that I don’ know nothin’ bout nothin’. Back in Ring The Belle Wrestling, my beautiful li’l pearl that y’all sewed on yer suit, our top belt was the Ring Titan Belt, which we affectionately called the Ring The Belt. Our champion would be called the Ring Titan. 

 

(Elisa pauses, it’s unclear if this is for effect or if she is figuring this out as she goes, though indications lead to the former.)

 

Elisa: Now y’all already have a bunch o’ folks callin’ themselves titans and that can get a mite confusing, so instead in my infinite wisdom I’m gonna kill two chickens with one hatchet. To honor our dear friend CN Starz, the Astrologer who shot too high, and our Titan title background, I’m christenin’ my new co-equal title The Aries Championship. 

 

Kendra: Okay, see, surely Leila can’t be okay with her not only adding a title, but making her old belt a co-equal.

 

Colin: I agree. This has power grab written all over it.

 

Elisa: Aries is the symbol of the Ram, which is the symbol of the Greek Titan Krios, the Ruler of the South. And we’re in Aries season now, so this also commemorates its birth. HOT DAMN I’m good. 

 

(She turns around)

 

Elisa: So this may actually be a win for y’all, Balor Wolfe. Y’all may only need to fight one person at Taxiderby. Or, y’all may be fightin’ three others. That…is on you and your actions.

 

(She begins to leave)

 

Elisa: Oh, one lass thing, shug… I didn’t forget your li’l freakout that got me in this role. For every staff member you hurt I’m addin’ another person to yer title match. Don’t try me. K, Darlin’?

 

(She gives a sugary sweet smile and small curtsy as she leaves, Balor now having this new edict facing him)

 

Balor Wolfe (raising an eyebrow):
"Okay? I don’t speak Yawhaw Yoke."

(The crowd erupts in laughter as Balor glances around, tilting his head like he’s trying to process Elisa’s words.)

 

Balor Wolfe (gesturing to the audience):
"Did you catch what they said? No? Just me? Alright, you know what— I know someone who does."

 

(He smirks and turns toward the stage.)

Balor Wolfe:
"Alastor! Come explain, please?!"

(The arena lights cut out instantly, plunging everything into darkness. A brief silence lingers before a playful, disembodied voice echoes over the PA system—)

 

Alastor (mock-offended):
"I resent that statement!"

 

(Just as suddenly, the lights snap back on, and standing right next to Balor, grinning ear to ear, is Alastor. The crowd pops as Balor casually steps back, shaking his head with a knowing smirk.)

 

Balor Wolfe (pointing at him):
"Y’know, I should be used to that by now, but seriously, man—boundaries."

 

Alastor (chuckling):
"Oh Balor, you wound me! I’m nothing if not... theatrical.”

 

Balor Wolfe (deadpan):
"Yeah, we noticed. Anyway, you’re from New Orleans. That counts as Yawhaw—just French."

 

(The crowd laughs as Alastor gasps dramatically, clutching his chest like he’s been gravely insulted.)

 

Alastor:
"How dare you! New Orleans is a refined culture, rich in history and filled with—"

 

Balor Wolfe (cutting him off):
"Yeah, yeah, voodoo, jazz, beignets, haunted buildings, I get it. Now, since you clearly speak ‘old-timey nonsense,’ can you please translate what Elisa Mae just said?"

 

(Alastor rolls his eyes but then turns to Balor with an exaggeratedly serious look.)

 

Alastor:
"Of course! To summarize: She’s letting you commentate on this little contender match, but if you or our dear Radio Silence pals so much as breathe too close to the ring—"

(Alastor suddenly leans in, voice dropping to a sinister whisper.)

"—you’ll be in a match against both contenders and Magnus at Taxiderby."

(He pulls back, his grin widening.)

"Oh! And if you get too violent backstage, she’ll just keep adding more opponents to your match—one after another after another."

 

(Balor exhales, dragging a hand down his face as he shakes his head.)

 

Balor Wolfe:
"So basically, she’s got insecurity issues and thinks I’m just gonna wreck shop for fun?"

 

(Balor pauses, then reconsiders.)

 

"Okay, bad example. But still—"

 

(He turns back to Alastor, motioning toward Elisa’s exit path.)

 

"So let me get this straight—she pulled all that folksy nonsense just to tell me I might have to fight more than one person?"

 

(Alastor nods sagely.)

*"Yup!"

 

Balor Wolfe (mock relief):
"Oh, well why didn’t she just say that?! Would’ve saved all of us the headache!"

(The crowd laughs as Balor turns back to face the hard cam, adjusting the title on his shoulder.)

"Look, Elisa, bless your heart—"

(The crowd OHHHHs at the passive-aggressive southern phrase.)

"—but you act like this is new to me. You think I’m scared of a triple threat? A four-way? A five-way? Lady, I’d fight the whole damn roster if I had to!"

(Balor paces the ring now, getting fired up as he continues.)

"And as for your brand-new Aries Championship, sure, cool, congrats on the history lesson. But if you think ANYBODY—Titan, Ram, Aries, whatever—can just waltz in and take my MAWL Mania Championship without fighting tooth and nail for it?"

(Balor shakes his head and smirks.)

"Then I really don’t speak Yawhaw Yoke, because that sounds like some real bullsh—"

(Alastor suddenly covers Balor’s mic, grinning at the crowd.)

 

Alastor:
"Now now, let’s keep it PG-13, shall we?"

 

(Balor shoves his hand away, laughing as the segment lingers, waiting for the next development...)

 

A little animation of a cowboy shows up on the screen.

 

Animated Cowboy: Hiya, Pardner! I'm Dan the Dictionary Desperado! Co-Equal, adjective, meaning of equal value! It jus' means one thing is worth the same as the other! Ain't no one takin' nothin' from ya, it jus' means you're sharin' the mountain! If y'all need me to define share, I can do that! 

 

The lights go out, and when they turn back on, Radio Silence have decided to leave for the time being. 

 

Colin: It's not the last we'll see of Radio Silence tonight, Balor will be watching over the first contender match and we also have EdgeRunners in action. 

 

Arvin: And, much to my delight, we have a whole bunch of card that has nothing to do with them!

 

Kendra: What is your problem with Radio Silence? 

 

Arvin: Where do you want me to begin. They just show up on a show they didn't belong on. Do you know what it's like to deal with that?

 

Colin: (flatly) No idea.

 

Kendra: IN the meantime, we have a tag team contest coming up next, with two people on opposite ends of the Inferno Title Match coming up next. 

 

ACE ANARCHY AND DUSTY MCGRAW VS MORGAN MAVERICK AND KALPANA

 

Ding ding ding!

 

Ash: The following tag team contest is scheduled for one fall!

 

 

Morgan Maverick and Kalpana are highlighted in silhouette as they pose at the top of the ramp, then throw their arms and raise their heads in unison.

 

 

Ash: First! Representing Zora Luthor International, the Philly Phirebird Morgan Maverick and Deep Space 10 Kalpana!!

 

Kalpana and Morgan tell the fans to talk to their hands as the strut down the ring.

 

Colin: And Zora Luthor has led these two so far astray. If you want to see them at their best, we'll soon be airing our classic matches on Channel WGS1, including the entirety iconic W2 event where these two really introduced themselves to MAWL. 

 

Arvin: You say astray, I say to victory.

 

Kendra: Well, I guess we'll see, won't we.

 

 

White sparks rain down over the entrance as Ace Anarchy bursts onto the stage. The screen behind him fills with falling ‘Joker’ playing cards, which ignite to reveal an anarchy symbol. The fans lose their minds.

 

 

Kendra: And they absolutely LOVE this man! 

 

Ash: And their opponents! First, from the Outback, Australia, weighing in at 225 pounds, the Thunder from Down Under, your Inferno Champion, AAAAACE AAAAANARCHY!

 

As his theme song hits, red and white strobe lights flash in sync with the rhythm. Ace Anarchy throws his arms up, singing along behind his mask. He bounces down the ramp, high-fiving and fist-bumping fans before sliding into the ring, ready for action.

 

Kendra: Wait...do we have a live band out? 

 

Colin: It's a ring debut, so I guess they wanted to go big.

 

 

 Lightning strikes a desert plain on the screen as silhouettes of kangaroos, emus, and a howling dingo flash across. The visuals switch to Dusty walking alone through the red dust until he arrives at the ring ramp. Pyro explodes like a bushfire along the ramp sides.

 

 

Ash: And his partner! Also from the Outback, weighing in at 153 pounds, DUSTY MCGRAW!

 

The bell rings, with Morgan and Ace starting.

 

Colin: Starting with a little preview of Taxiderby as Morgan and Ace circle each other. And Ace absolutely drills Morgan with the State of Decay! Wanting to wrap this one up quickly-

 

1!

2!

 

Kendra: And Morgan gets the shoulder up. Ace with a solid fist to the top of her head as he gets up, and following that with a pair of stomps. Morgan tags in Kalpana. Kalpana whips Ace into the corner, tags Morgan back in, double suplex to Ace! Morgan putting him up for a spinebuster...Ace reverses into a spinning neckbreaker!

 

Arvin: Morgan up quickly and a brutal forearm shot to Ace! And she follows that up with an arm whip. Momentum starting to swing to ZLI. Morgan going for a scoop slam and Ace reverses it to an inverted DDT!

 

Colin: Don't underestimate Ace's ability to get out of a situation. Both Ace and Morgan with the tags now and Dusty runs ROUGHSHOD over Kalpana with that shoulder block! Dusty throwing a few quick rights as they both get to their feet. Dusty throws Kalpana across the way with that Irish Whip and going for the big boot, no Kalpana ducks it and comes back around with a corkscrew dropkick! Kalpana goes for the pin, but Dusty is up quickly and Dusty gets her up as well with a snap suplex...and a second! And a third...no, Kalpana rakes his eyes.

 

Arvin: Do what you can to get out of the situation. She jumps up for a DDT, NO! He reverses it into a Spinebuster. 

 

Kendra: The Aussies are built different. You're lucky to get any sort of sustained attack on them.

 

Colin: Well between Ace and Morgan and Tyler and Cassandra, I doubt ZLI will be making any inroads in Australia proper. They'll have to settle for New Guinea. 

 

Arvin: Kalpana tags Morgan back in and Morgan with a running elbow shot to Dusty. Dusty's got a smile on...oh that's not a good sign.

 

Colin: BOOMERANG BASH! The speed and torque on that discus lariat has Morgan flipping on impact! Going for the cover but Kalpana rushes in and stomps him before the 1 and Ace chases her back out. Back to the snap suplex and Morgan rebounds off the mat on impact. Taking advantage of Morgan being down and goes for the Crossface...and locks it in.

 

Arvin: Is that wrenching really necessary? The crossface is just fine as is. You're doing too much! 

 

Kendra: That's that Southern Cross Lock and Morgan is in a lot of trouble...going for the ropes, if she can't make it I truly don't see this working out for her, and Kalpana gets her hand to the rope and tags herself in! Morgan gasps as she rolls out, Dusty doesn't seem to mind though and SITOUT POWERBOMB! THE ROPES ARE SHAKING! 

 

Colin: Red Dirt Driver! 

 

Arvin: Another sitout powerbomb. How original.

 

Kendra: It's effective. Go with what works.

 

Colin: Well, Kalpana gets herself to the ropes before the 1 count. Dusty lets go and Kalpana rebounds herself off the ropes, Salida Del Sol! Wait, she's adding a little spice to the end of it! 

 

Arvin: Kalpana, even if she doesn't call herself it anymore, remains the Innovator of Inaruwa, and anyone who forgets that is gonna learn the hard way. She tries to parlay that into a pin, but Dusty kicks out. Picks Dusty up from the legs into a Tombstone hold, oh I think we know where this is going...THERE IS THE FLIP! NEPAL BEARER! Going for the Taker pin...

 

1!

 

Colin: And Ace stomps her off Dusty! Dusty able to get a bit of awareness and wrapping the arms...oh he's got the Southern Cross in on Kalpana! 

 

Arvin: But he wasn't smart enough to get her away from the ropes and it amounts to not much of anything for him, she uses the ropes to flip them around and going for the pin now! 

 

1!

 

Kendra: Nope, Dusty kicks! And he needs to get to the corner...it's time for him to get outta there...YES! HOT TAG TO ACE AND ACE BLASTS KALPANA WITH A RUNNING BOOT! Kalpana kips up quickly and is rewarded by a Superkick! She gets both sides of Ace's right foot! She kips up again, but this time she ducks the left Superkick and leg dragon whip! She tags in Morgan. 

 

Colin: Morgan comes in with a diving clothesline, no Ace ducks it and German Suplex! Bridging for the pin-NO! MORGAN REVERSES INTO A VICTORY ROLL! And Ace tries to reverse that into a bridge pin but no dice. 

 

Arvin: Morgan gets Ace up on her shoulders and taking him for an Airplane Spin! F5!! BURNING PASSION!! Going for the cover-

 

1!

2!

3!

 

Morgan Maverick wins by Pinfall!

 

 

Ash: Here are your winners, Morgan Maverick and Kalpana, ZORA LUTHOR INTERNATIONAL!

 

Arvin: Well, Ace, hope you're ready for a repeat next week! 

 

Colin: That would truly be a worst case scenario. 

 

Arvin: Come on, Colin, you don't see the poetic justice in beating the Inferno Champ with the Burning Passion?

 

Colin: I do not.

 

Kendra: Well, our next match is borne of punishment to Rade for his actions last week, if you remember, he dropped La Sangre Maldita last week, and far from it getting a title shot, now he has to fight for his spot in the Endocytosis Match tonight.

 

RADE VS GOLDBERG

 

Ding ding ding!

 

Ash: The following contest is scheduled for one fall and is for a spot in the Endocytosis Match!

 

The lights go completely out. The arena is filled with sounds of owls hooting and clocks ticking.

 

Kendra: Here we go.

 

 

Red smiley faces show in hologram around the arena in time with the bell. Ann "Atomic" Lee steps out to the stage, illuminated only by the red glow in the dark mask that she removes from her face. Ash immediately holds their microphone down as they have learned by now their microphone is turned off. 

 

 

Her smirk is illuminated by the glow of the mask. The music has kept in the ticking of the clock and bell, not so much as a skip but as a purposely extended opening.

 

Ann: The Empress wept, for her plan had inevitably backfired. What she foresaw as a punishment was a promise, what she saw as a consequence was an opportunity. An opportunity to increase the collection. An opportunity to further spread the message. An opportunity for blood. The Demon cried not, for he knew that lay before him was a bounty. The Demon learned not to shrink in chaos but to bloom in it. Thank you, unwise Empress, for this gift you have unwittingly bestowed upon us. Thank you, for this pot of Gold that we are about to open will provide us riches indeed. Thank you for your sacrifice, your own pain shall be swifter for it when your time comes to face the man who hails from the Black Forest and the deepest caverns of your damaged and distorted psyche, weighing 355 pounds and the weights of your crushed hopes and dreams and title aspirations laid bare and shattered beneath the feet of finality, he is der Blutsammler...

 

HE. IS.

 

The keyboard finally kicks in and the appearances of the red smiley faces intensify rhythmically as a towering figure enters behind her.

 

 

Ann: RADE. 

 

Rade walks down the ramp with Ann leading him, both illuminated mostly by the glow in the dark masks. 

 

Colin: Goldberg is a rare man who does not fear the Reaper. But this must surely even give him pause. 

 

Ann stands in front of Rade and stares up as if being baptized from the sky. Rade spits blood upwards and it rains on her. She smiles wickedly to the camera and leaves the ring.

 

 

Goldberg storms out, and punches the sky on each side of him, with fireworks going off by his punches.

 

 

Ash: From Oklahoma, weighing in at 284 pounds, he is GOLD! BERG!

 

Goldberg yells as he stretches out his muscles. 

 

Arvin: Why is Oldberg yelling? Did he get a cramp?

 

Kendra: Oh give it a rest.

 

The bell rings.

 

Colin: This would be a tremendous win for Goldberg if he could get himself into this match, but he has a hell of an obstacle and said obstacle starts by booting him back a whole foot. You don't want to give Goldberg any space though because he'll come back with a SPEAR! And goes for the pin-

 

1!

 

Kendra: Rade gets up, throws him off the ropes and up he goes...Popped up and into the Chokeslam! Just buried Goldberg 7 FEET UNDER! The one handed pin-

 

1!

2!
3!

 

Rade wins by Pinfall!

 

 

Ash: Here is your winner, RADE!

 

Kendra: Rade maintains his place in the Endocytosis Match later tonight! 

 

The lights go out as "Mitternacht" plays over the Loudspeakers.

 

 

Ann "Atomic" Lee is backstage when a Raven with a monocle lands on her shoulder. The raven is holding a letter.

 

 

Ann opens the letter, which reads:

 

"Dearest Ann,

 

I find your curiosity in our plasma to be endearing.

I cordially invite your good self and your cohort Rade to attend one of my seminars being held at Columbia University in New York City. I think you will find it both intriguing and enlightening. 

 

I look forward to seeing you there.

 

Yours faithfully,

Damian."

 

Ann looks at the camera, perturbed but curious.

 

 

Colin: Well it'll certainly be interesting times for Rade and Ann "Atomic" Lee if they take Damian's invitation next week at Taxiderby. Personally I wouldn't.

 

 

Arvin: Yeah, because you're a coward.

 

Colin: Well, if you think you're braver than me, Arvin, by all means join them next week.

 

Arvin: I wasn't invited.

 

Colin: That's what I thought.

 

Arvin: It's rude to show up uninvited. It's not cowardly to be courteous, Colin.

 

 

Kendra: Well, the MAWL fans here in Hartford won't have to wait for next week to see Damian, because he's in action next when the Animalities take on Spirit Crusher.

 

ANIMALITIES VS SPIRIT CRUSHER

 

Ding ding ding!

 

 

Ash: The following tag team contest is scheduled for one fall!

 

 

The bassline kicks in and the lights flash rumble orange and purple with orange and purple spotlights in an X  strobing intensely to the guitar riff. When the drums hit, Jaguar King and Lionheart stomp in their respective colors and a giant crown firework explodes behind them. The crowd loses their dang minds.

 

 

Ash: First, the challengers! From New York City, at a combined weight of 506 pounds, two thirds of the Trios Champions, Jaguar King and Lionheart, they are ANIMALITIES! 

 

They high five the crowd on the way down and then fist bump. 

 

 

The fog machine, candles and 18th century street lamps adorn the entrance way. Titantron/screen shows images of leeches, pre-20th century surgery, anatomical drawings, plus short video clips of Blackheart performing submission moves and ringing a hand bell in full plague doctor uniform. 

 

 

Ash: And their opponents! At a combined weight of 495 pounds, The Empiric Damian Blackheart and Shadow Kawashima, SPIRIT CRUSHER!

 

The bell rings.

 

Colin: Jaguar King and Damian Blackheart to start. Blackheart charges in with a rolling elbow to King, follows it up with a quick punch, King attempts to respond but Blackheart blocks and headbutt!

 

Kendra: Whipping King into his corner now, tag to Shadow, and a beautiful, brutal double suplex to King. King bouncing off the mat...Shadow catches him now and setting him up...SHADOWBREAKER! Going for a pin, but Lionheart runs in with a save.

 

Arvin: Blackheart tagged back in, whip to King and double back body drop! Spirit Crusher are doing a solid job of keeping King out of the reach of a tag.  Jaguar King attempting to try to turn this around, going for a huracanrana and Blackheart denies him! Big swing back to the Crusher corner. Again, this is what you gotta do, cut the ring in half.

 

Kendra: Blackheart picks Jaguar up, PLAGUEBRINGER! Going for the pin but Lionheart saves again before the count can begin.

 

Colin: That's a lot of speed you need to make it across the ring before the ref can make the count.

 

Arvin: Kawashima launches Lionheart clear out of the ring and close to the barricade! Speed's not gonna mean all that much if you're struggling to get on your feet.

 

Colin: I think you might be right, Arvin, Damian tags Kawashima in and Scalpel Kicks King. Oh, I don't like where this is going.

 

Kendra: Shadow setting him up with the Piledriver, Damian to the top and SPIRIT IN THE SKY! Shadow covers and I think that'll do it!

 

1!

2!
3!

Shadow Kawashima wins by Pinfall!

 

 

Ash: Here are your winners, Damian Blackheart and Shadow Kawashima, SPIRIT CRUSHER!

 

Arvin: Masterful teamwork by Spirit Crusher, kept Lionheart out of the equation for the most part and prevented Jaguar King from landing a true offense. 

 

 

The lights flicker—purple and green flood the arena. Smoke creeps down the ramp.

 

A twisted melody plays... a carnival tune turned sinister.

 

From the top of the ramp...He struts through the haze, crowbar in hand, smile sharp as a blade— Jay the Joker has arrived.

 

 

Beside him? The queen of chaos herself—Harley Quinn—swinging her bat, blowing kisses and causing mayhem in heels.

 

 

He doesn't rush. He saunters.

Every step? A mind game.

Every glance? A warning.

 

 "Why so serious?" he sneers to the crowd.

Then swings the crowbar over his shoulder like it’s part of the uniform.

 

The crowd roars. Or maybe they boo.

Either way—he's smiling.

 

[Crowd buzzing, mic in hand, Jay stands in the middle of the ring with Harley perched on the ropes, chewing gum, smirking]

 

Jay the Joker:

“Ohhh you all think it’s funny, huh?”

 

—He chuckles, pacing the ring.

 

“One… little… fluke. And suddenly everybody’s a critic.”

 

 Crowd boos. Jay smirks.

 

“You think last week meant something? That loss? That—oopsie?”

—He swings the crowbar around lazily.

 

“That wasn’t a loss… that was a commercial break. A filler episode. A glitch in the matrix.”

 

Harley laughs from the corner, blowing a kiss to the booing crowd.

 

“I wasn’t beaten—I was bored.”

 

 He leans on the ropes, eyes wide, voice drops low:

“See, while you were laughing at me… I was laughing at how fast I’m gonna burn this whole roster down.”

 

 Crowd starts chanting “You lost! You lost!”

 

He grins.

“Yeah? Well the joke’s on you, sweethearts…

because the comeback?

It's gonna hurt a hell of a lot more than the loss.”

 

“Let’s talk about last week, shall we?”

—He smirks, pacing with the mic like it’s wired to explode.

 

“Manta Ray.”

—The crowd pops—some cheers, some boos.

“Congrats on your little ‘victory.’

You swam into the ring… flopped around…

and somehow, some way… you ended up with your fin raised.”

 

 He pauses. Tilts his head. Grins.

 

“That? Was luck. That wasn’t skill. That wasn’t power. That was a one-in-a-million slip on a banana peel moment.”

 

Harley laughs off-mic: “He tripped on his own flippers!”

 

Jay (pointing to the camera):

“So here’s what’s gonna happen, fish boy. You like surprises?

You like making waves?

Well I like breaking tables, climbing ladders… and cracking chairs across spines.”

 

 The crowd gets rowdy.

 

“TLC.

No rules. No escape.

Just you, me… and a whole lotta furniture getting absolutely demolished.”

 

 He climbs to the second rope, crowbar raised high.

 

“You beat me once by accident.

Now let’s see if you can survive me… on purpose.

I’ll be waiting, Manta. Let’s turn your lucky splash… into a full-blown car crash.”

 

 Jay’s chaotic music hits. Lights flicker. Harley flips the timekeeper’s table for fun. Ring’s in chaos. Mic drops.

 

 Slightly shaky phone footage. The sun’s setting behind a crashing ocean. The sound of the tide rolls steadily. Manta Ray stands in the shallow surf, mask on, arms crossed, hoodie flapping in the sea breeze. His tone is low, calm, but brimming with purpose.

 

 

Manta Ray:

“You hear that, Joker?”

 

He gestures behind him to the endless waves.

 

“That’s the ocean. It doesn’t shout. It doesn’t scream. It doesn’t cackle or spin jokes until you forget what’s real.”

 

He steps forward, water splashing gently around his boots.

 

“It just moves. Steady. Constant. Inevitable.”

 

He looks down, then back to the camera. Voice firm now.

 

“I saw your little circus. I heard the crowbar jokes. The banana peel excuses. The carnival threats. Funny stuff. Real performance art.”

 

Takes a long pause..

 

“But here’s the thing, Jay—I’m not laughing.”

 

He walks slowly along the shore, camera following.

 

“You talk about tables, ladders, chairs like they’re toys. You want chaos? Fine. Bring it. I grew up fighting on sand, in sweat, with nothing but instinct and stubbornness. I didn’t have a stage… I had scars.”

 

He stops walking, standing still as the wind blows harder.

 

“You said I ‘flopped around’ and won by luck? Nah.”

 

Now the fire’s there. His voice stays steady, but the weight of it shifts.

 

“You underestimated me, and that’s why you lost. You weren’t bored, Joker… you were beaten. Not by some accident. Not by a glitch. But by someone you thought didn’t matter.”

 

He pauses.

 

“That was your mistake.”

 

He steps closer to the camera, lowering his voice.

 

“And now you want a TLC match?”

 

He nods once.

 

“Good. Because in the ocean, there are no rules. And when the waves rise, when the ropes are gone and everything breaks down… I thrive.”

 

He crouches down, scoops up wet sand in his hand, letting it fall through his fingers like time slipping away.

 

“You’re chaotic, Jay. But the ocean is patient. And I promise you… in a match with no rules?”

 

He stands straight again, fully centered in frame.

 

“You’ll find out just how deep I can drag you.”

 

One last look to the crashing sea. Then to the camera.

 

“Manta Ray. TLC. I’m not coming to play in your circus…”

 

Pause. His arms raise in the manta-wing pose.

 

“I’m coming to drown it.”

 

FADE OUT with the sound of waves, wind, and distant thunder rumbling.

 

Colin: There you have it, another new match for Taxiderby. And Jay and Harley are laughing at the promo. 

 

Arvin: Of course they are. 

 

 

Manta Ray charges down the ramp. 

 

Kendra: Well they ain't laughin' now, the man is here!

 

Jay the Joker and Harley Quinn appear to scurry out of the ring. 

 

Colin: Yeah, you better run! 

 

Kendra: Something feels off here. 

 

Manta Ray yells at the ramp and beats his chest to the crowd's adulation. Harley sneaks in behind him. 

 

Colin: Look out Manta-HARLEY WITH HER BAT! RIGHT TO THE BACK OF MANTA! And another shot!

 

Arvin: They got him flopping like a fish!!

 

Joker and Harley leave laughing.

 

Kendra: And Manta's about to have a fight, but is he going to be in good enough condition for it??

 

MANTA RAY VS MAGNUS

 

Ding ding ding!

 

Ash: The following contest is scheduled for one fall. Already in the ring, from Profundidas del Mar, weighing in at 185 pounds, Manta Ray!!

 

 

The lights flicker and dim, casting the arena in shades of black and crimson red, creating a shadowy, ominous atmosphere. Fog starts to roll in from the entrance ramp, swirling in thick clouds, making it difficult to see anything clearly—heightening the sense that something dark is about to emerge from the mist. Occasionally, flashes of bright white or red light cut through the fog, only further adding to the dramatic effect.As the music builds, a slow, steady walk is the first thing that stands out. From behind the curtain emerges Magnus, a towering figure silhouetted by the dim, red lighting.

 

 

Ash: And his opponent, from Ironforge, Norway, weighing in at 300 pounds, MAGNUS!

 

His expression is as cold and unreadable as ever, his eyes scanning the arena with an icy, calculating gaze.

 

Magnus doesn’t rush to the ring. He moves slowly, as though he’s savoring the moment, letting the crowd feel his presence. The audience is split between fear and disdain, but no one dares to take their eyes off him. With every step, the fog swirls around him, enhancing his intimidating presence as he moves closer to the ring.His posture remains perfect—back straight, shoulders squared. Every movement exudes dominance and control. As he approaches the ring, he may glance over at the audience, never breaking his cold demeanor, letting them feel the weight of his gaze. He ignores any attempts at taunting or heckling, his focus solely on the ring and the task at hand.
Once Magnus reaches the ring, he stands for a moment at ringside, surveying the environment, scanning the crowd, and then slowly climbs the steps. As he enters the ring, he does so with a heavy, deliberate motion. The ropes bend slightly under his immense weight as he steps over them, his movements measured and controlled.

 

Upon entering the center of the ring, Magnus might raise his hand high, his fist clenched in a symbolic gesture of power, or he might simply stand there, letting the tension in the air grow even thicker. He doesn’t do anything flashy—his entrance is a statement, a demonstration of raw, intimidating presence.

 

Once inside the ring, the lights slowly return to normal, though the red glow still lingers around the edges, casting an unsettling hue over the scene. Magnus stands motionless for a moment, as if daring anyone to challenge him. His focus remains solely on the task at hand—the GM's will, the opponent he’s about to crush, or the message he’s meant to deliver. The music fades, leaving an eerie silence before the match begins.

 

Kendra: Manta Ray at a vast disadvantage after that attack by Harley, but it's not going to stop him from battling. Running across the ropes, spinning headscissors to Magnus! Magnus running from another direction and jumping spin kick! Manta launching himself at Magnus and OH! Magnus catches him mid-air with a driving mat slam! Going for the pin-

 

1!

2!

 

Colin: Manta with the reversal and rolls Magnus up!

 

1!

 

Arvin: Magnus kicks out, dropping Manta with a humongous belly to belly! Manta kips up but Magnus spikes him down with a catching Uranage! And going for the Iron Fist AND HE NAILS MANTA WITH IT! Going for the pin, Manta kicks! WHAT?

 

Kendra: Magnus is shocked too but shakes it off, Irish Whip to Manta, Manta ducks a clothesline from Magnus, coming back around the bend and going for the huracanrana, Magnus Powerbombs him! MANTA KIPS UP!

 

Arvin: Stay down!

 

Colin: Manta's kip up stopped by a punch to the skull sending him crashing to the mat, but Manta kips up AGAIN! NO! MAGNUS DOUBLE AXE HANDLES HIM BACK DOWN! Magnus gets ahead of the kip up...IRON FIST CHOKESLAM.

 

1!

2!
3!

 

Magnus wins by Pinfall!

 

 

Ash: Here is your winner, MAGNUS!

 

Kendra: And who's to say what would have happened had Harley not batted Manta Ray? He showed amazing fight even after being battered.

 

 

Backstage. Jay the Joker and Harley Quinn stroll together down the hallway like it’s their kingdom—laughing at something no one else would dare find funny.

 

From around the corner—

 

 

JASSY (sing-song): Ohhh, there he is! Mister Joker himself! 

 

Joker stops. So does Harley. Jassy steps forward like she owns the hallway—blowing her bubblegum the size of a grenade, hips swaying, dripping with sass. The Psycho $upremacy fans out behind her like a royalty entourage. Nero lingers in the back, arms folded, one eye glows like a phantom.

 

JASSY (grinning): The way you bled for that loss last week? Poetry. You were a mess, a masterpiece, a whole crime scene calendar.

Harley’s head tilts like a wind-up toy starting to glitch. She steps forward, just enough to draw the invisible line.

 

HARLEY:  Okay… Why does it feel like I’m looking into a funhouse mirror that’s way too into my lipstick? Tch. You rehearsin’ to be me in a school play or somethin’?...

 

Jassy stands with her hands on her hips, mimicking Harley’s actions, as she speaks. Harley snaps, pushing the top of her bat into Jassys chest and softly pushing her back.

…Back it up, sweetie—there’s only one crazy Barbie in this toy box.

 

Jassy pouts dramatically, then grins wider.

 

JASSY: Awwww, don’t be jealous, doll. We’re practically twins—like blood on glitter.

 

Harley rolls her eyes so hard it might register on a Richter scale.

 

Meanwhile, Nero steps forward, voice smooth and slow, like molasses poured over a tombstone.

 

 

NERO: You… You’re both wild. But you, Jay... there’s music in your violence. And when I hear music, I don't ignore it…

 

A breath passes.

 

… Join us. Psycho $upremacy. Not as followers. Not as fans. As kindred souls… who burn louder together.

 

Jassy leans in close, inches from Joker’s face, eyes locked.

 

JASSY: So what do you say, pretty boy? Wanna set this whole place on fire with us?

 

Silence.

 

NERO: Look, watch my match tonight! You’ll see what I mean about true power, and us ruling this place together with chaos!

 

Joker doesn’t move. Doesn’t blink. But his shoulders twitch… a sound escapes—

 

JOKER: Hehehe... hehe... hehe… heh.

 

It builds. A soft high-pitched giggle, growing under his breath like a kettle scream no one else hears. He laughs like he just heard the funniest joke in the universe…

 

…and he’s the only one who understands it.

 

Then without a word—he walks past them, laughing. Hands in his pockets. Harley following with one last suspicious glare at Jassy. Her hands doing that thing where you poke your own eyes, then try to poke the eyes of the person you're looking at, but not really.

 

His laughter echoes down the hallway, louder and louder—

—until he’s gone.

Fade out.

 

 

Colin: Psychos recognize psychos. 

 

 

Arvin: They don't care if you win or lose, it's how much destruction you cause along the way. And in some way I respect that.

 

 

Kendra: Of course you do. Psychos recognize psychos.

 

Colin: Exactly. 

 

Arvin: Let's keep it moving.

 

KIKI, KAMRY, AND KACY KRUEL VS VIOLET AND THE NEW SKYLIGHTS

 

Ding ding ding!

 

 

Ash: The following trios tag contest is scheduled for one fall!

 

 

The titantron shows an alternating image of all the pictures of the women in the stable in a K interspersed with each of them cheating in a match. Kamry, Kacy, and Kiki pose like three superspies at the stage.

 

 

Ash: First! Representing KRUEL, Kamry, Kacy, and the United States Champion Kiki Kruel!

 

They fluff their puffs and throw their heads up in unison, then struts down the ramp. They turn and flip their hair and enter the ring. 

 

 

As Violet bursts out of the gate, she finishes taping down her fists forearm length. When she is done, she stops and throws a haymaker forward, and two pyros explode. 

 

 

Ash: And their opponents....First! From Los Angeles, California, VIOLET!

 

She takes her time, touching hands with fans.

 

Kendra: She is a woman of the people, and she's been having issues with Kiki since she got here.

 

 

With the drum rhythm, rotating columns of all of the colors of the rainbow surround the stage to a huge pop.

 

Kendra: You can't deny the love the people have for this team.

 

UV and Lazer run out clapping in time.

 

 

Ash: And her partners, UV and Lazer, the New Skylights!

 

The bell rings.

 

Colin: Kiki and Violet start, and this looks like it could well be a taste of what's to come at Taxiderby. 

 

Kendra: Violet gets us going with a huge backhand to Kiki and slams her down with a rollicking suplex! Violet off the ropes and going for a swinging neckbreaker...OH! Kiki swings her around and Itoh Deluxe! Kiki wants to be done with her quickly.

 

Arvin: Kiki knows that this match is beneath her and you can tell she's sending a message to Violet that she's made a grievous error in stepping to her.

 

Kendra: Violet gets her foot on the rope and Andra is warning Kiki but Kiki lets go before it goes to a count. Violet gets some bounce from the rope and launches herself at Kiki with a Dropsault! Riding the momentum, springing from the next rope up and Asai Moonsault!

 

Colin: Kiki up quickly, rakes the eyes of Violet and a jump kick to the back of the head!! Violet kips up and BANDIT COUNTRY! 

 

Kendra: Violet's ability to hit that out of nowhere makes her a massive threat. She goes for a pin but Kiki rolls out of the way and tag to Kacy. Kacy running in and Poison Rana! Going for the pin but Violet's shoulder is up before the 1. Pushes Kacy off her and coming off the ropes...OH THERE'S THAT 360 FACEBUSTER! THE AFTERPARTY IS ALWAYS ROUGH! And the pin-

 

1!

2!

 

Colin: Violet gets the shoulder up! To her feet, coming off the ropes, going for a Moonsault Splash but Kacy sidesteps and ANOTHER 360 Facebuster! Trying for the pin-

 

1!

 

Kendra: UV disrupts the count and Violet tags Lazer in! Lazer is Blazin'! A speedbag punch combo to Kacy's face! Irish whip and WHOA KACY DUCKS IT, BACK AROUND AND KACY WITH A BULLDOG.

 

Arvin: Don't assume that just cause she likes the VIP section of the club that ain't still that American Ninja Warrior from New Jersey. Lazer quickly to her feet, going for a Lariat and Kacy parlays it to a swinging neckbreaker! 

 

Colin: To your point Arvin, she's still that same woman but with a taste for champagne and cruelty, as she face washes Lazer and stomps her out! Lazer's momentum was quickly stymied and she's doing all she can to block those stomps, OH SHE CAUGHT ONE! To her feet, swinging Kacy around and catching her into that Southern Lights Suplex she calls the Light Bright! 

 

Arvin: You're not gonna keep Kacy down long though, and she kips up with a dropkick to stagger Lazer back. Kacy tags in Kamry, this is a fight many weeks in the makin'! Kacy and Kamry stalking Lazer now and that double DDT bringing her right to the mat. Lazer cowards out and tags in UV.

 

Kendra: UV charges with a forearm shot to Kamry! And a Powerslam! Kamry rising to her feet, coming up she's hooking UV's leg! She's got him up in the Fireman's Carry! 

 

Arvin: Going for a spin, she renamed the F10 in honor of her hometown, here we go F-UTENA! 

 

Colin: Not sure if it's an honor but can't argue with the results! UV hits the mat with a thud and Kamry with a cover-

 

1!

 

Kendra: UV gets the shoulder up! And immediately Kamry responds with a Snap DDT! UV tags Lazer back in, oh here we go! 

 

Colin: Lazer grapples her former partner and going up into the Northern Lights Driver! Wait...UV lifts them both on his shoulders!! Tower of Doom Northern Lights Driver!! KAMRY IS ABOUT TO CRASH AGAINST THE LIGHTHOUSE! OH!!! What an impact! Lazer with the cover-

 

1!

 

Colin: IT IS NOT ENOUGH. Kamry gets the shoulder up, and rakes the eyes of Lazer on her way up, Lazer holding her face and Kamry rides that into a small package DDT! Going for the pin, Lazer kicks before 1. 

 

Kendra: There's a fire and a determination present in a one-fall situation that isn't there in an elimination. Both teams know that you can't rely on your team to pick up the pieces if you're out and so you fight through every pain to stay in it. 

 

Colin: So true. Lazer now off the ropes...ZZZZZAPP! Zapped her former partner with the Spinning Polish Hammer!

 

Arvin: You gotta love how Kamry shakes it off like it's nothing at all, takes herself off the ropes and back around, going for a bulldog and OH Lazer turns it into a sidewalk slam! A fist drop! Going for a second first drop but Kamry gets herself up qith a quick punch.

 

Colin: Lazer heads to the corner, looks like she wants out for now, NO! KAMRY YANKS HER BACK AND RIPCORD ELBOW SMASH! 

 

Kendra: Lazer isn't taking that lying down and a forearm shot, oh Kamry cracks her neck and Here We Go, F-UTENA! Okay, I have to admit that was badass. The cover-

 

1!

 

Colin: Lazer kicks and scoops the pin attempt up...LIGHT BRIGHT! Kamry slides out of the way and no pin attempt can be made. Kamry coming from the ropes and a running Spin Kick NO! LAZER DUCKS AND KNEES KAMRY IN THE STOMACH! SUNSET FLIP POWERBOMB! Going for the pin but Kamry rolls out to the apron again.

 

Kendra: She's a slippery Sloane that one. From the apron, SPRINGBOARD FLATLINER! Lazer quickly up and we're about to get a LAZER LIGHT SHOW!!

 

 

1!

 

Arvin: Kiki with the save, true teamwork by Kruel.

 

Colin: Lazer undeterred, O'Connor Roll, NO! Kamry reverses the roll!

 

1!

2!

 

Kendra: Violet with the save! Lazer needed that assist and she's freed up...off the ropes and Supergirl Clothesline!! Kamry rolls behind Lazer and to her feet, going for the Dragon Sleeper but Lazer elbows out of it and Judo Flip! Lazer lifts her up into an Arm Whip! And a second one! Oh that second one sounded like it rattled something. Kamry tries to avoid this and gets up on her own, Spinning Back Kick, NO! LAZER DUCKS AND CLOCKS HER IN THE BACK OF THE HEAD WITH A LARIAT! 

 

Colin: This is the fight the crowd has been wanting from these two! Lazer comes off the ropes and going for the Moonsault Splash...KAMRY GETS HER KNEES UP! LAZER GETS WINDED! The momentum has shifted yet again!

 

Arvin: Kamry wasting no time capitalizing and deadlifts her into a back suplex! Lazer back to her feet and going for the tag...NO! Kamry dropkicks her in the back! I think Lazer's head hit the middle turnbuckle on her way down!

 

Kendra: Perhaps more importantly for Lazer, her arms fell short of tagging distance. She's gonna have to keep going for a bit. Up to her feet now and a stiff punch to Kamry! Kamry only staggers back a mite though and sends Lazer careening into her corner! Tag to Kiki, and the two are alternating punches on Lazer in the corner!

 

Colin: Lazer letting out a battle cry and dummy tackles Kiki all the way across the ring to her own corner, Lazer's finally going to get the tag AND NO DENIED AGAIN AS KIKI CONTORTS HER INTO AN ITOH DELUXE! This woman cannot catch her rest!

 

Arvin: She'll get her rest when she taps out! Or passes out! Looks like one or the other is coming up quickly! Kiki may have this one in the bag!

 

Kendra: Violet and UV both reaching their hands in to relieve Lazer, and Violet gets there first! I don't think Kiki saw it but Andra sure did, Violet enters the match with a springboard reverse DDT on Kiki!! THAT is how you do a rescue mission!

 

Colin: Violet with the bridging suplex for the pin, NO! KIKI REVERSES INTO A VICTORY ROLL AND NO! VIOLET BRINGS IT BACK TO THE BRIDGE AND Kiki kicks. Violet tosses Kiki back into the Skylight corner, tags UV in and lifting up Kiki into a Doomsday, UV with that Springboard Corkscrew Lariat he calls the UV Ray!! What a thing of beauty! Going for the cover!

 

1!

2!

 

Kendra: Kiki gets up the shoulder!! How!!

 

Arvin: She's a legend, Kendra. I keep telling you two this. These scrubs are no match for pure ring history. Kacy pulls Violet out of the ring with an apron suplex and Kiki Kruel locks in the Itoh Punish! 

 

Colin: UV fighting and he barely gets to the ropes. Kiki's frustration is evident now. She rakes the eyes of UV and LOW BLOW! UV feeling it but riding the momentum and hooks her legs as he goes down, into a pin attempt but Kiki gets out without any fuss. Kiki with some face punches from the ground, UV catches one and arm-wrench monkey flip!

 

Arvin: Kiki doesn't even miss a beat as she backflips to her feet and catches UV as he's getting with a dropkick! UV sent past the apron! Kacy and Kamry grab an arm each and Kiki baseball slides him! They are perhaps the best unit in the game today.

 

Colin: Tag to Kacy and this gives UV a chance to break free, springboard Tomahawk Chop to Kacy! And he gets the tag to Violet who gets herself to the top and LOOK AT THE DISTANCE ON THAT DIVING KNEE STRIKE! THAT IS SNIPER LEVEL RIGHT THERE! Nails Kacy Kruel in the head! 

 

Kendra: That is Jordan level air time right there.

 

Colin: Kacy up and two kicks to Violet's midsection, Violet meets her with a headbutt. Kacy tags back to Kiki and Kiki comes in with a diving double axe-handle! Violet with a quick right, a quick left, she's a-throwin' hands! Getting Kiki backed up a bit and KIKI GRABS THE HAND AND MANIPULATES THE SITUATION INTO AN ITOH PUNISH! 

 

Kendra: Violet taking the long push to the ropes, tug of war between her and Kiki, UV's got his hands outreached, Violet trying, damn Kiki is strong though! UV leaning over as far as the ropes can take him and TAGS HIMSELF IN! DIVING LEG LARIAT TO KIKI!!

 

Arvin: UNBELIEVABLE! DISRESPECTFUL!

 

Colin: Kiki agrees with you Arvin and a rake to the eyes of UV. Kiki going in with a series of headbutts, UV loads a big one back in return and tries for a roll-up but no dice. Going for the schoolboy now, Kiki rejects him again.

 

Arvin: He should be used to this rejection by woman at this point in his life.

 

Kendra: Game recognize game, I guess. UV does see he probably needs to do more though, Irish Whip and meets Kiki with a boot. Kiki gets up and cheap punt kick to the nethers of UV, which she follows into an Exploder Suplex!

 

Arvin: It's not like he was usin' em. 

 

Colin: Kiki charges UV at the turnbuckle, NO! UV jumps up and she hits the middle post! OH HE COMES DOWN WITH A MUSHROOM STOMP AND DRIVES HER HEAD INTO THE MIDDLE TURNBUCKLE! THAT WAS INCREDIBLE APTITUDE SHOWN BY THAT YOUNG MAN.

 

Arvin: Kamry walks towards Kiki and a tag is made, Kamry in with a jumping neckbreaker to UV! He's not staying down!! Stay down dude! NO! He hits a German Suplex on Kamry! AND KAMRY UP! KAMRY GETS HIM UP...THAT MOVE IS KNOWN BY MANY NAMES, THE BODYBAG, THE BIG ENDING, SHE CALLS IT THE BODYKAM AND HE'S CALLING HIS MAMA TO PICK HIM UP.

 

1!

2!

 

Arvin: UV makes it to the ropes?!? HOW?? HOW DOES THIS KEEP HAPPENING??

 

Colin: However you feel about these two teams, here's what you can't deny: they are putting on an absolute banger of a match and making their cases to be main event worthy.

 

Kendra: You're absolutely right, Colin. They're not just a group of blonde mean girls. They're not just a scrappy color wheel of jobbers. These six are the real deal. They've shown tenacity, they've shown ring smarts and team smarts. Whatever happens next, everyone here should be proud.

 

Arvin: Well, what happens next is Kamry tagging Kiki back in, setting UV up with a Summer Crush, Kiki off the ropes and a basement dropkick. It's a Kruel Summer for UV. The wrongs are being righted, the cover is had,

 

1!

2!

3!

 

Kruel wins by Pinfall!

 

 

Ash: Here are your winners, KRUEL!!

 

Arvin: Maybe now you'll show some damn respect for your champion.

 

Colin: And now we have a brand new segment, wherein one of our most intense competitors chronicles his travels! It's "Gozu GoezTu". 

 

 

Cheerful music plays as Gozu takes a stroll down various streets.

 

 

Gozu enters the Mark Twain house and is admiring some of the accoutrement when he overhears a conversation-

 

Tourist 1: Twain abhorred violence famously. I don't think he'd be okay with your going to the army.

 

Tourist 2: What are you talkin' about? Twain was all about messing people up. 

 

Tourist 1: Bro no.

 

Tourist 2: "Let's light a fire in a powder room we'll double the fire department to put it out. We're like wild beasts with the smell of blood who wonder at the brutal appetites." We're aggressive by nature my dude.

 

Gozu taps Tourist 2 on the shoulder and then launches him with a Devil's Descent off the balcony then gets to his feet and looks his camera.  He sticks his finger up.

 

Gozu: "We build a fire in a powder magazine, then double the fire department to put it out. We inflame wild beasts with the smell of blood, and then innocently wonder at the wave of brutal appetite that sweeps the land as a consequence."

 

Gozu nods sagely then walks into another room and the Blue Danube picks back up. 

 

 

Colin: Gozu is a man of many talents. But his favorite is destroying things.

 

 

Kendra: Next week we'll be in New York, so there will be much to destroy.

 

 

Arvin: And we've got more wildness to go here with a brawl coming up.

 

BRAWL
JAMES D VS LUCIE "TIGER" ROSSI

 

Ding ding ding!

 

 

Ash: The following contest is a brawl! There are no pins or submissions or disqualifications. The only way to win is to knock your opponent out. 

 

 

The guitar squeak times with a fountain of orange fireworks as Lucie Rossi stomps on the ground.

 

 

Ash: First! From Milan, Italy, Lucie "Tiger" Rossi!

 

Lucie gives high fives to audience members on her way to the ring.

 

 

As his theme music plays over the PA system, James D holds back until the song kicks in and then makes his way out from behind the curtain.

 

 

Ash: And her opponent! From New York City, weighing in at 190 pounds, the most interesting man in the World, he is the Eurasian Champion JAMES D!

 

As he moves into the sight of the fans, he's met with boos but this just brings a smile to his face. The boos continue to rain down towards James but it doesn't phase him as he makes his way down the ramp. James rolls into the ring and then stands in the corner as he awaits the bell being rung.

 

The bell rings.

 

Colin: James D has a Pipe! He comes charging at Lucie with it, but Lucie blocks and a forearm shot staggers him back! James retaliates with his own forearm shot. Lucie grabs the arm and hooks him up, a Spinning Tiger Suplex!

 

Kendra: James D in some trouble now but trying to fight back, off the ropes and drills Lucie with a bulldog! Lucie up quickly, throwing some punches and backs him into the turnbuckle! Puts him on the top rope, climbing up with him...TIGER DRIVER OUTSIDE! Wait...the Ref is calling for the Bell already?

 

Arvin: James's head just BOUNCED off the steps Kendra, and Andra is stopping the match before he can obtain an injury. 

 

Colin: He does still have to defend his title next week at Taxiderby, so it may not be a popular call, but it's the right one.

 

Lucie "Tiger" Rossi wins by Referee Stoppage!

 

 

Ash: Here is your winner, Lucie "Tiger" Rossi!

 

Kendra: Wait, we've got company!

 

 

Arvin: Sarah Sharp with a spear! She takes Lucie off her feet!! AND GETTING HER UP WITH THAT DEADLIFT AND SHARP DRESSED! There's a reason she's called the Most Striking Woman in Existence!

 

Colin: No one calls her that except you and her. 

 

Kendra: The action still coming fast and furious and next we've got Tag Team chaos!

 

EDGERUNNERS VS DOOMSAYERS

 

Ding ding ding!

 

Ash: The following tag team contest is scheduled for one fall!

 

 

As the thundering riffs of "Painkiller" by Judas Priest erupt through the speakers, the arena’s lights flicker rapidly between harsh whites and fiery reds, casting shadows that twist and distort like a storm approaching. A sense of impending doom fills the air as the crowd starts to murmur in anticipation.

 

Suddenly, The Prophet steps out onto the stage, his sharp suit glinting under the flashing lights, an ominous presence at the center of it all.

 

 

His dark eyes scan the arena, locking onto the crowd with a sense of power that draws all attention to him. With a slow, deliberate motion, he raises his arms, and the lights above flicker violently, plunging the arena into a momentary blackout. The crowd holds its breath.

 

Then, Doomsayer Pistol bursts from the shadows, sprinting to the ring with manic energy, his arms pumping and his eyes wide with excitement.

 

 

As he jumps over the top rope in a fluid, high-flying maneuver, his adrenaline-fueled aggression is apparent. The lights flash rapidly as he takes his position, ready for action.

 

Doomsayer Hammer follows with a slower, more deliberate pace, his towering presence dominating the stage.

 

 

Ash:
"Ladies and gentlemen and everyone in between, the following contest is scheduled for one fall, and it is about to be graced by the presence of one of the most fearsome and ominous teams to ever step into this ring…
With a combined weight of 510 pounds…
From Parks Unknown…
First, standing 6'0" tall, weighing 210 pounds, The High-Flyer of Fate, DOOMSEYER PISTOL!

"And his partner, standing 6'10" tall, weighing 300 pounds, The Titan of Tribulation, DOOMSEYER HAMMER!

"And with them, standing between them in a suit, the one who foretells their victory,
THE PROPHET!

"Together, they are…
**THE DOOMSAYERS!”

 

He steps over the top rope with a deep, resonant thud, his sheer power emanating from every movement. The lights focus on his massive frame, accentuating the intimidating aura that surrounds him. His eyes are locked on his opponents, and there’s no mistaking his dominance in the ring.

 

With The Prophet standing between them, his hand placed solemnly on their heads, the two Doomsayers kneel together as the lights snap back into an intense, flickering display of crimson and white, flashing in time with the song's relentless pace. The arena vibrates with the sheer force of the music and their presence. The Prophet smiles darkly, his eyes gleaming with malicious intent, fully aware of the chaos about to unfold.

 

The crowd roars, knowing that the end is near—no one is safe from the wrath of The Doomsayers.

 

📢 [Arena Lights Cut to Black – The Tron Flickers with Glitching Code]

 

 

🎵 "Cause we lost everything... we had to pay the price..."
– A deep red and electric blue light pulses on stage, illuminating two silhouettes standing in the smoke. Their Radio Silence masks flicker with neon lines, glitching like corrupted data. The crowd buzzes as Johnny and V stand motionless, heads tilted slightly in unison.

 

 

🔥 [The camera zooms in—slung over Johnny’s shoulder is the championship belt, its gold reflecting the neon glow. Around V’s waist, the title gleams under the pulsing lights.]

🎵 "I saw in you what life was missing..."
– They take slow, methodical steps forward, their championship gold catching the light with every movement. The neon reflections dance off their black and chrome cyberpunk-inspired gear.

🎵 "You lit a flame that consumed my hate..."
🔥 (SYNC MOMENT: As "flame" hits, sparks shoot from the stage, casting their figures in a chaotic glow.)

🎵 "I'm not one for reminiscing but..."
– They stop at the center of the stage, standing side by side. The camera zooms in on their masks—Johnny’s glowing red and silver, V’s pulsing blue and green—with their championship titles shining between them.

🎵 "I'd trade it all for your sweet embrace..."
🔥 (SYNC MOMENT: On "embrace," they both slowly remove their masks, revealing their faces.)

🎤 Ash Greaves:

"And their opponents… at a combined weight of 385 pounds… representing Radio Silence… they are two-thirds of the reigning, defending, MAWL Trios Champions… the high-flying, system-crashing outlaws of the future… JOHNNY! V! THE EDGE RUNNERS!”

🎵 "Cause we lost everything... we had to pay the price..."
– Johnny adjusts his championship belt on his shoulder, giving it a confident glance before tapping it twice. V runs a hand across the title around their waist, smirking at the hard cam.

🎵 "There's a canvas with two faces... of fallen angels who loved and lost..."
– The beat kicks in, and they explode into a sprint, storming down the ramp.

🎵 "It was a passion for the ages... but in the end, guess we paid the cost..."
🔥 (SYNC MOMENT: As "paid the cost" hits, Johnny slides into the ring, his championship belt clutched tight, while V leaps onto the apron in one fluid motion.)

🎵 "A thing of beauty - I know..."
💥 (The entire crowd starts buzzing, knowing what’s coming.)

🎵 "WILL NEVER FADE AWAY!"
🔥 (SYNC MOMENT: The entire arena sings along, voices booming as Johnny and V climb opposite turnbuckles, raising their championship belts high.)

🎵 "What you did to me - I know... said what you had to say..."
– Johnny beats his chest before holding the belt out in front of him, staring at it for a second before throwing up the rock-and-roll horns. V unbuckles their title and raises it high, smirking at the camera.

🎵 "But a thing of beauty... WILL NEVER FADE AWAY!"
🔥 (SYNC MOMENT: The crowd roars it in unison, shaking the arena as Johnny and V hop down, meeting in the center of the ring.)

🎵 "I see your eyes, I know you see me..."
– The duo stands tall, staring down their opponents or the hard cam, soaking in the electric atmosphere, their titles shining under the lights.

🎵 "A thing of beauty - WILL NEVER FADE AWAY!"
🔥 (Johnny and V raise their belts one last time as the lights return to normal, ready for battle.)

 

The bell rings.

 

[DING DING DING!]

Colin McRae: "Here we go—Johnny and Pistol starting this tag clash off, and if you blink, you might miss the first five moves!"

 

[They tie up fast—Johnny with the go-behind, switches to a snapmare takedown, kicks Pistol in the back, then hits the ropes for a basement dropkick to the spine!]

 

Kendra Mavis: "That’s how you set the tone! Johnny’s not giving Pistol an inch."

 

[Johnny pulls Pistol up—knife-edge chop! Another! Irish whip—Pistol rebounds, leapfrog by Johnny—drops down—Pistol jumps, but Johnny springs up with a standing hurricanrana! Pistol rolls halfway across the ring!]

 

Colin: "He nearly sent Pistol into orbit with that!"

 

Arvin Wallace: "Yeah, yeah—wait until Hammer gets in. That flips real quick."

 

[Johnny drags Pistol by the wrist—tags in V. V springboards in with a missile dropkick! Pistol drops. V hooks the leg.]

 

Ref: ONE! TWO—

[Kickout!]

 

Colin: "Quick cover from V! These two are moving like clockwork already."

 

[V grabs Pistol—Russian leg sweep. Tags Johnny back in. V stays on the apron—Johnny slingshots in with a slingshot senton!]

 

Kendra: "Just beautiful. They're carving Pistol up with this rhythm."

 

[Johnny lifts Pistol—snap suplex into a roll-through deadlift suplex! Covers again.]

 

Ref: ONE! TWO—

 

[Kickout. Johnny’s already tagging back to V. V springboards—springboard moonsault! The crowd pops.]

 

Colin: "Another tag! That’s four inside two minutes—they’re just dismantling Pistol!"

 

Kendra: "It’s classic Edge Runners—get the fast tags, stack the momentum."

 

Arvin: "Yeah, but that’s only if they can finish it. Otherwise? They’re just waking the beast."

 

[V grabs Pistol by the head—spinning back kick to the ribs! Johnny tags back in. V whips Pistol into the corner—Johnny hits a running European uppercut! V follows with a corner backflip kick to the head! Pistol stumbles out—Johnny hits a springboard neckbreaker!]

 

Colin: "Tag-team clinic right now! Pistol is reeling!"

 

[Johnny tags again—V leaps in—DOUBLE STOMP / SWINGING NECKBREAKER COMBO! Crowd fires up again.]

 

Ref: ONE! TWO—

 

[Kickout!]

 

Kendra: "Pistol’s hanging on by fumes."

 

[V brings Pistol up—goes for an Irish whip—but Pistol drops and thumbs the eye behind the ref’s back! Johnny protests—ref’s distracted—Pistol crawls—tag to Hammer!]

 

Colin: "And here comes Doomsayer Hammer!"

 

[V charges—Hammer FLATTENS him with a shoulder block! Then grabs V—military press—and drops him face-first into a falling knee strike!]

 

Arvin: "Told you. The mood just changed."

 

[V staggers to his feet—Hammer grabs him again—spinning side slam! V bounces off the mat hard!]

 

Kendra: "That looked brutal! V’s in trouble now!"

 

[Hammer doesn’t rush—he lifts V again—Bearhug! Squeezing tight—V’s feet kick, arms flailing—Hammer swings him into a bearhug suplex! V lands awkwardly near the ropes.]

 

Colin: "He just ragdolled him! That’s nearly 200 pounds flying like it’s nothing!"

 

[The Prophet raises a single hand at ringside—expression unreadable. Pistol is on the apron, sucking wind. Johnny’s pacing on the edge, shouting for the tag, arms out.]

 

Arvin: "And now you see the plan. Wear ‘em down, then let Hammer make the whole ring feel like punishment."

 

Kendra: "V needs to get out of there fast or he might not have a comeback."

 

[The crowd is rallying, trying to will V to move, but Hammer is just getting started, stalking toward him again as the first act of this tag war closes.]

 

Arvin: "Momentum has shifted. The Edge Runners were firing on all cylinders—but now it’s the Doomsayers’ game… and Hammer is smashing that reset button."

 

Colin McRae: "We are deep into this tag battle, and right now, the Doomsayers have flipped the script. V is in no-man’s land."

 

[Hammer lifts V like a child—snake eyes on the turnbuckle! V bounces off chest-first—Hammer hits the ropes and levels him with a running big boot!]

 

Ref: ONE! TWO—

 

[V kicks out, barely.]

 

Kendra Mavis: "V’s just getting battered. He needs to tag out now."

 

Arvin Wallace: "Nah, let him suffer. This is how you punish high-flyers—rip the wings off."

 

[Hammer tags in Pistol—Pistol stomps V as Hammer holds him. Pistol follows up with a slingshot elbow drop off the second rope! Hooks the leg.]

 

Ref: ONE! TWO—

 

[Kickout.]

 

Colin: "Frequent tags now from the Doomsayers. They’re cutting that ring in half like it’s drawn in chalk."

 

[Pistol yanks V up—short-arm lariat! Then floats over with a rear chinlock, grinding the forearm across V’s jaw.]

 

Kendra: "Smart move. Slow the match down. Control the pace."

 

Arvin: "And make him feel every second of it. That's the Prophet's influence—pain with purpose."

 

[V reaches for the ropes—Pistol transitions into a body scissors and punches him in the ribs.]

 

Colin: "Pistol’s clinging like a parasite right now. He knows he can’t let V build any momentum."

 

[The ref checks—V refuses to quit. He starts to roll, pushing backward—he nearly stacks Pistol for a pin! But Pistol lets go and pops to his feet—soccer kick to the spine! V screams.]

 

Arvin: "He’s not tagging out like this. Not with Pistol that close to cutting him off every time."

 

[Pistol tags back in Hammer—grabs V’s arms from behind. Hammer measures—clubbing forearm across the chest! V drops to his knees. Hammer grabs the legs—catapult into the bottom buckle! V's neck whiplashes back.]

 

Colin: "That might be the most dangerous part of the ring and Hammer’s weaponizing it!"

 

Ref: ONE! TWO—

 

[V gets a shoulder up. The crowd’s starting to rumble, chanting “Let’s go V!”]

 

Kendra: "He’s still in this. Somehow!"

 

[Hammer tags out—Pistol in. They whip V to the ropes—double shoulder block! Then Hammer lifts V into a sidewalk slam, and Pistol follows with a diving leg drop!]

 

Colin: "That’s some rare tandem work from the Doomsayers!"

 

Ref: ONE! TWO—

 

[Kickout again. Pistol slaps the mat and yells something inaudible to the crowd, then grins.]

 

Arvin: "Pistol’s enjoying this. He likes it when the hope’s just about gone."

 

[Pistol stalks V—grabs him for a suplex—but V knees him in the head mid-lift! Again! Pistol drops him—V with a wild swing—Pistol ducks and lifts him for a back suplex—NO! V flips out mid-air and lands on his feet! The crowd comes alive!]

 

Colin: "He stuck the landing! Can he capitalize?"

 

[V lunges for the corner—Hammer from the apron rushes in—V leaps and hits a dropkick to Hammer’s chest! Hammer falls backward—colliding right into Pistol! Pistol stumbles and drops to one knee.]

 

Kendra: "YES! That’s the window V needed!"

 

[Hammer gets tangled up in the ropes, arms stuck for a second. The Prophet screams from ringside to get control.]

 

Colin: "Hammer’s caught in the ropes! Pistol’s dazed—and V is crawling—reaching for Johnny—!"

 

**[The crowd’s on their feet—V inches forward—Pistol grabs his ankle—but V kicks him off and dives—TAG TO JOHNNY! The arena explodes.]

 

Kendra: "HERE COMES JOHNNY!"

 

Arvin: "The tag is made and business is about to pick UP!"

 

Colin McRae: "Johnny’s in and he’s FLYING! The tempo just hit overdrive!"

 

[Johnny vaults over the top rope as he tags in, charges Pistol—running forearm smash! Pistol stumbles back to his feet—Johnny with a second—drops him!]

 

Kendra Mavis: "That’s that Edge Runner momentum kicking in! You give Johnny space, he’ll take the whole ring!"

 

[Hammer gets untangled from the ropes, steps through, trying to intercept—Johnny ducks a lariat, hits the ropes—springboard spinning back elbow! Hammer drops to one knee!]

 

Colin: "Springboard back elbow from nowhere! That’s signature Edge Runners chaos!"

 

Arvin Wallace: "It’s all flash! Doesn’t mean a thing if you can’t keep a guy like Hammer down."

 

**[Johnny drags Pistol up—snap suplex! Rolls through—hangs on—fisherman suplex! Doesn’t pin, instead scrambles to the top rope.]

 

Colin: "Johnny’s going airborne!"

 

[Pistol stands, dazed—missile dropkick! He folds up on impact! The crowd’s electric!]

 

Kendra: "That might’ve knocked the taste out of Pistol’s mouth!"

 

**[Hammer charges from behind—Johnny sees him last second—rolls under a big boot, rebounds—leaps for a flying crossbody—BUT HAMMER CATCHES HIM MID-AIR!]

 

Colin: "Oh no—he got caught!"

 

**[Hammer adjusts for a **World’s Strongest Slam—BUT JOHNNY TWISTS—swinging DDT!! Plants Hammer FACE-FIRST into the mat! The crowd LOSES it.]

 

Kendra: "HE TURNED IT AROUND! That’s unreal!"

 

Arvin: "Okay, that was slick. Even I gotta give him that one."

 

[Pistol’s back up—tries a sneak shot—Johnny cartwheels out of it, hits the ropes—sliding knee strike to the jaw!]

 

Colin: "Pistol just got his lights shut out!"

 

[V pulls himself onto the apron—Johnny sees him, nods, points to the crowd—the fans know what’s coming.]

 

Kendra: "This crowd is going nuts, Colin!"

 

[Johnny sprints to the corner—tag to V! He slingshots in—Johnny runs the ropes—SUICIDE DIVE to Hammer on the outside! CRASH!]

 

Colin: "Johnny TAKES OUT HAMMER!"

 

[V hits the opposite ropes—TOPÉ CON HILO! He CRUSHES Pistol outside the ring! The crowd is on fire.]

 

Kendra: "DOUBLE DIVES! This is what the Edge Runners do!"

 

Arvin: "Bodies flying like it’s a car crash with no brakes—these maniacs don’t know how to slow down!"

 

[The Prophet shouts for his monsters to rise, but both Doomsayers are wiped out—Hammer trying to sit up, Pistol clutching his ribs. Johnny and V regroup on opposite ends of the outside.]

 

Colin: "The Doomsayers are down. The Edge Runners have turned the tide completely—and the Prophet looks STUNNED."

 

Colin: "This match has become a demolition derby and we’re just getting started!"

 

Colin McRae: "Pistol’s been rattled and he’s about to be served up on a silver platter!"

 

[V grabs a fistful of Pistol’s hair, yanks him off the floor, and rolls him into the ring. Johnny stands tall inside, bouncing on his feet, locked in.]

 

Kendra Mavis: "There’s nowhere to run now. The Edge Runners smell blood!"

 

[But just as Johnny reaches for Pistol—HAMMER steps onto the apron! One leg in the ring—]

 

Colin: "Wait a minute! Hammer’s not done yet—"

 

[Johnny nods at V. In unison, they run—double step-up enzuigiri! One off the ropes, one off Johnny’s back—both boots SMASH Hammer in the skull!]

 

Arvin Wallace: "Oh, DAMN!"

 

**[Hammer teeters, loses his balance—and topples backwards off the apron—CRASHING into the Prophet! Both men go down hard at ringside!]

 

Kendra: "THEY WIPED OUT HAMMER AND THE PROPHET! That’s a two-for-one special!"

 

Colin: "And now Pistol’s completely alone!"

 

[Johnny turns around, fire in his eyes. He stalks Pistol—lifts him up—powerslam position! V's already climbing the turnbuckle.]

 

Colin: "They're going for it—it's time!"

 

**[Johnny charges forward with Pistol on his shoulder—V LAUNCHES! Off the top rope—**double foot stomp to the back of Pistol’s skull—at the SAME TIME Johnny SLAMS him down!]

 

Kendra: "JACKED IN—"

 

Colin: "CUTTING CORDS!!!"

 

[Pistol BOUNCES off the mat from the combined impact—V hooks the leg! Johnny drops to one knee, glaring at the floor as the ref slides in—]

 

Ref: "ONE! TWO! THREE!!!"

 

[Bell rings. Crowd EXPLODES.]

 

Arvin Wallace: "...They just broke that man in half."

 

Colin: "The Edge Runners pull it off in spectacular fashion! Hammer’s out cold on the Prophet, and Pistol just got erased!"

 

Kendra: "That was tag team wrestling at its wildest—and cleanest. These two just earned that win ten times over."

 

[Johnny and V regroup in the center of the ring. V throws up the "peace and wires" hand sign while Johnny crouches low beside him, but now—they both motion to their waists. Slow, deliberate gestures—miming championship belts being strapped around them as they stare dead into the hard cam.]

 

Colin McRae: "Look at that... they’re not just celebrating a win—The Edge Runners are making it crystal clear."

 

Kendra Mavis: "They want gold. And after a performance like that? I don’t see how you don’t give ‘em a shot!"

 

Arvin Wallace: "Gotta admit—those belts would look real good on waist-high wire junkies like them."

 

Colin: "Message sent to every team in the back: Johnny and V aren’t here to just steal the show—they’re coming to own it."

 

[The crowd roars as The Edge Runners hit the corners, standing tall beneath the lights—two warriors in sync, already envisioning themselves as champions.]

 

Edge Runners win by Pinfall!

 

 

Ash: Here are your winners, Johnny and V, the Edge Runners!

 

 

The camera opens with Nero in a darkened backstage area, the Psycho $upremacy banner draped behind him. He leans forward, sneering as he responds to SM Heartbreakers past promo.

 

NERO: SM Heartbreaker… I don't know whether to laugh at you or pity you. You keep running your mouth. You obviously didn’t learn your lesson last time because you couldn’t keep your pointy nose out of our business. So since you want to keep playing games, and butt in… let’s play a game…

 

He looks at the others in the room and signals by pointing to the doorway.

 

…Go grab him.

 

 

Psycho $upremacy—Jassy, Red Ghost, Tides of Time, Rufus, and Bloodswan—exchange knowing smirks before marching down the hallway to the locker rooms. As soon as they enter the last corridor before reaching the locker rooms, the atmosphere shifts immediately. The flickering lights overhead buzz, then die completely. 

 

Darkness engulfs the hallway. A faint red glow replaces it, casting eerie shadows. Blood-smeared writing appears on the walls. The paint on the wall starts peeling and the walls rust, and break off. A ceiling panel falls and breaks behind Red Ghost.

Tides grins despite feeling uneasy. He quickly glances around.

 

TIDES OF TIME : Well… this is new.

 

 Rufus cracks his knuckles.

 

RUFUS: Ain’t nothing but a cheap parlor trick.

Bloodswan is hesitant, her arms crossed.

 

BLODDSWAN: I don’t think we should be here. Something’s wrong. Plus, this isn’t lady-like to be marching into a men’s locker room…

 

A thick fog seeps from under the locker room door, swirling at their feet like something alive. Bloodswan steps back.

 

BLOODSWAN: See? He’s in the showers. No way I’m going in there. I’ll stay out here and keep watch.

 

Jassy grins devilishly.

 

JASSY: Oh, now I definitely have to go in. Maybe we can get a real nudey shot this time instead of that AI nonsense he pulled.

 

The others shake their heads, but push forward.

 

Bloodswan lingers behind as Jassy, Rufus, Tides of Time, and Red Ghost push through the fog and enter the locker room. Bloodswan tries to peer in but there is too much fog.


The air is thick, humid, and tainted with an unsettling silence.

The only sound is a soft, raspy voice whispering…

 

"Help me… Save me… Please…"

 

Through the misty red lighting, a figure sits on a steel chair at the far end of the room, facing away from them. The voice continues, the tone high-pitched, almost childlike.

 

“Oh who’s there? Please help me. Won’t you save me? I’m all alone… so helpless… so vulnerable…(hehe)”

 

The voice lets out a little giggle.

 

The group know it’s SM Heartbreaker playing games. They creep forward cautiously, exchanging uncertain glances.

step.

step.

step.
step.
step.
step.


As they get within reach, Jassy lunges to grab him—

 

JASSY: GOTCHA!

 

SNAP!

 

The man's head spins around a full 180 degrees. The face is blank, lifeless. It’s a mannequin! The mannequin collapses forward, its wires snapping as it jerks unnaturally, releasing a distorted, electronic laugh. The laughter warps and twists, looping over itself as the dummy spasms on the floor.


Red Ghost steps back.

 

RED GHOST: What the hell—?!

 

Before they can react further, the locker room slowly creeks shut, and locks.

A shadow steps out from behind the door—draped in a towel, and a wicked grin plastered across his face. The group turns to face the shadow, while chills run up their spine.

 

TIDES: Oh sh*t!

 

Then the shadow becomes more visible as the fog begins to dissipate, and the lights of the locker room beam bright. The shadow is revealed to be SM Heartbreaker himself, holding an electronic device.

 

 

TIDES: Oh ha-ha good ones. Hey it’s just that dweeb trying to mess with us.

 

Red Ghost lets out a slow laugh as he looks down at the wet front of his pants. He tries to act brave and cover up his embarrassment.

 

Good thing none of his team mates seen it

 

RED GHOST: Heh. Coulda fooled me aye.

 

SM Heartbreaker looks at Red Ghost and winks.

 

SM HEARTBREAKER: Yeah haha, can’t get anything past you brave wittle ghost. 

 

He then directs his attention to the whole group.

 

SM HEARTBREAKER:  Ahh if it isn’t my biggest fans. Is this the smoke show you were looking for? ....

 

He holds his arms out wide, his towel almost unravelling, but he’s quick to retrieve, and recover himself up properly. 

 

Jassy laughs. She then puts her hand to her chin, and a finger to her lips eyeing SM Heartbreaker up before speaking.

 

JASSY: Nice tricks, but the jigs up sweetheart. You’re coming with us.

 

SM Heartbreaker runs his fingers behind his ear, and turns and looks back at Jassy coyly. 

 

SM HEARTBREAKER: Awww, but I have a big surprise for you.

 

He points to Jassy. Then quickly and awkwardly points to the rest.

 

…And you… you, and you too!

 

JASSY: Well as enticing as that sounds, We’re going to have to decline. We have strict orders to bring you back to ‘boss’, and besides, I have a short attention span, and I'm bored now. So Rufus, Tides, and Red Ghost, why don’t you’s grab him quick before his towel almost falls off again.

Suddenly Rufus, Red Ghost and Tides are startled when they see three figures in the corner of their eyes emerge from around the corner where the other section of the locker rooms are.

 

 

First is Gozu, towering over everyone else, his hulking frame casting an overwhelming shadow. His eyes glow faintly, his movements slow and deliberate. Looking like he just discovered his prey. He clenches a fist with one hand, and punches the palm of his other open hand, letting out a slow low haunting growl.

 

RED GHOST: Oh look, it’s Heartbreakers side chick.

Gozu continues to growl. 

 

Red Ghost gets an elbow nudged into his side by Rufus.

 

 

Then beside Gozu stands JCM Ace who was almost made a victim of an attack from Nero and the Psycho $upremacy. He has his arms crossed, shaking his head.

 

JCM ACE: You messed with the wrong guy.

 

 

And lastly, Jay the Joker, new to MAWL is beside JCM Ace. His face twisted in a wide, unhinged grin, bouncing on the balls of his feet, licking his lips in excitement.

 

JAY THE JOKER: The only sensible way to live in this world is without rules. Me? I’m just here for the carnage. Andddddd, I guess this is also the answer to your offer, because I heard there was going to be a massacre of your group, and I wanted to get in on the action. You see, I like when a man takes action. 

 

The Psycho Supremacy tenses up, fists clenched knowing that they’ve fallen into a trap.

 

JASSY: Ughh, Now I've definitely lost my appetite.

 

Jassy spits in SM Heartbreaker's face.

 

JASSY: You pig, you’re going to pay once Nero hears about this.

SM HEARTBREAKER: Speaking of Nero, where’s that coward leader of yours? 

JASSY: Bite me! I ain’t gonna tell you nothing.

Jassy, Rufus, Red Ghost, and Tides of Time instinctively shift into a fighting stance, but before they can react—Gozu strikes first.

 

BOOM!

 

A single, monstrous clothesline from Gozu flattens Tides of Time, flipping him inside out before he even registers the attack. His body slams onto the cold tiles, motionless.

 

Bloodswan can hear loud fighting noises inside the locker rooms, and assumes SM Heartbreaker is playing hard to get, so the others have to give him a beating first.

 

BLOODSWAN: Ooh heh, probably sent that fool flying.

 

Back inside, Rufus charges at Gozu, throwing heavy fists into the monster’s midsection. Gozu barely flinches. Instead, he grabs Rufus by the throat, lifts him up like a ragdoll, and chokeslams him onto the steel chair. Rufus’ back cracks and arches from the impact.

 

BLOODSWAN: Rufus is breaking furniture now? He better leave some of him for me!

 

Jassy turns to SM Heartbreaker, fury in her eyes. She lunges—only for Jay the Joker to suddenly pop up beside her, giggling like a maniac.

 

JAY THE JOKER: Peekaboo, princess!

 

Jassy swings wildly, but Jay ducks, weaving in and out of her strikes like a madman, laughing the whole time. Then—WHAM! He smashes her face-first into a row of lockers. The metal dents on impact. As she stumbles back, dazed, Jay grabs her head and repeatedly bashes it into the locker doors, his cackle echoing in the room.

 

BLOODSWAN: Jassy must be destroying that punk. He is going to need more than ice pack when she’s done with him.

 

Meanwhile, Red Ghost attempts a sneak attack on SM Heartbreaker, but he sees it coming. With perfect timing, he ducks under Red Ghost’s wild punch and drives a stiff elbow into his gut. Red Ghost doubles over, gasping for air—only for SM Heartbreaker to deliver a quick snap DDT onto the concrete floor. JCM Ace grabs Red Ghost by the top of his ring attire, and drags him into the corner where some benches are, and just inflicts more pain with punches, and elbows. He then stands, and lays Red Ghosts head on the bench and stomps on his mouth.

 

JCM ACE: Lil red bitch gonna feel like shit in the morning.

 

Bloodswan, still outside, hears the loud THUD and chuckles to herself.

 

BLOODSWAN: Wow, they throw that man through the floor. Not going to be much left of him when I get my hands on him.

 

Inside, Rufus groggily gets to his feet, but Gozu is waiting. The monster grabs Rufus by the arms and launches him across the room. Rufus crashes into the showers, his body smashing into the tiled walls before crumbling into a heap. He then follows up with a charging shoulder tackle, smashing Rufus' head through the wall of the shower.

 

Jassy, bleeding from her forehead, tries to swing at Jay, but he catches her arm, spins her around, and locks in a chicken wing submission.

 

Jay whispers in her ear.

 

JAY THE JOKER: Shhh… Just let it happen… Heheheheh!

 

He drives his boney knuckles into her eye socket, and across her forehead, before licking the blood from his knuckles. He then pushes her over to SM Heartbreaker who catches her drooping body before it collapses, and kisses her forehead before delivering a quick DDT, dropping her right onto the unforgiving floor. 

 

He spins up onto his feet. 

 

Jassy lets out a grunt of pain as she sprawls out, barely moving.

 

Bloodswan hears a loud CRACK and grins.

 

BLOODSWAN: Yo, Jassy’s going off in there! Beat that punk’s ass, girl!

 

Inside, Tides of Time barely gets to his knees before SM Heartbreaker steps up, and puts him in a headlock, he cranks Tides head back, and delivers yet another devastating DDT, dropping Tide right on the top of his skull. Tides is, knocked out cold.

 

One by one, members of The Psycho $upremacy are laid out, groaning in pain, bloodied and battered or unconscious.

 

SM Heartbreaker steps over Jassy’s limp body, adjusting his towel and smirking as he surveys the carnage.

 

SM Heartbreaker: I hope you liked my big surprise!

 

Jay the Joker squats beside Jassy, playfully slapping her cheeks to see if she’s still conscious.

 

JAY THE JOKER: They’re so cute when they’re asleep.

 

Gozu just grunts, towering over the wreckage, arms crossed.

 

SM Heartbreaker casually strolls toward the door, and as he opens it, Bloodswan is still standing there, arms crossed, shaking her head.

 

Bloodswan: Took long enough. You leave me anything?

 

She looks up—and her face drops as she sees SM Heartbreaker standing there, perfectly fine, towel still draped over him. Her eyes dart past him, and her mouth slowly falls open as she sees her entire faction wrecked inside the locker room.

 

BLOODSWAN: … The hell?

 

SM Heartbreaker smirks, winks at her, and pats her on the head like a child before casually walking past her down the hallway. Jay the Joker follows, skipping. JCM Ace chuckling as he eyes up Bloodswan and Gozu, nowhere to be seen, left and disappeared into a shadowy corner.

 

Bloodswan watches them disappear, then slowly turns back to the mess inside the locker room. Jassy groaning, Rufus sprawled out, Red Ghost barely moving, Tides knocked cold.

 

Bloodswan whispers to herself quietly.

 

BLOODSWAN: … Man, y’all suck.

 

 

Colin: A common saying is the enemy of my enemy is my friend, and the Psycho $upremacy just learned the hard way that if you piss off too many people then it doesn't matter how they see each other in the moment.

 

 

Kendra: Meanwhile, Nero is actually here, and has a match against one of the men involved in that altercation...right now as it turns out.

 

 

Arvin: A non-stop individual tournament to decide who's going to face James D for the European champion. And because behind that Southern Charm is a Paranoid Patty-Sue, Elisa Mae decided to cut the entrances altogether and have the contestants in pods that are being lowered as we speak. She's hoping to avoid having any sort of interference, to which I say Good Luck with That.

 

EURASIAN TITLE CONTENDER TOURNAMENT

 

Ding ding ding!

 

 

Ash: The following is the continual tournament! Each match will be scheduled for one fall. The winner of each round will return to their pod to continue on to the next round and the loser will be eliminated! The winner of the tournament will go on to face James D for the Eurasian Title at Taxiderby! Open the first two pods!

 

ROUND 1: JCM ACE VS PSYCHO $UPREME NERO

 

 

The bell rings.

 

Colin: Apparently the no-entrance was a way to stop what was happening backstage just moments ago from continuing. Jay the Joker is also in this tournament. It took out some of the frills and thrills of before the match, but luckily these competitors are exciting in of their own right.

 

Kendra: These two had it out last week and it was truly brutal. This week they are first round foes. Both men sizing each other up, both men know the other can halt momentum. JCM makes the first strike with a rib kick and snap DDT! Nero to his feet quickly, ducks a lariat by JCM and Half-Nelson Suplex! Going for the pin, but JCM slides out early.

 

Arvin: Nero is smart to try to wrap JCM early, JCM gets harder to beat the longer a fight goes. Nero with a solid right hook, JCM responds with a European Uppercut. Nero pays him back with a flurry of flying hands, big right hook, gut punch, going for the uppercut, JCM ducks him and uses that leverage to get him up with the Fireman...ACE BOMB! Going for the cover-

 

1!

 

Colin: Nero headbutts JCM right off him and as they get to their feet Nero winds his head back a little and a rattling headbutt! JCM staggers and Nero scoops him up for a Powerslam! Nero picking JCM up before he has a chance to recover, going for the Double Knee Backbreaker! SPINE MALIGN!!

 

1!

 

Kendra: JCM kicks! Can't keep the man down and from the ground position, JCM gets up and another Snap DDT! 

 

Arvin: Nero back to his feet and NEROLYZER! Going for the pin but JCM gets his hand on the ropes. 

 

Kendra: Nero's plan isn't coming to fruition the way he wants, to get in and get JCM out before other hands have a chance to enter the pot. Nero realizing now he has to break him down a little, two big headbutts and a strong knee to the gut, JCM doubling over a little and Nero...slaps him! He's looking to embarrass him a little.

 

Colin: You don't do that with JCM Ace, and JCM stares him in the eyes as he grabs the slappy hand, devastating armdrag! JCM locks that armbar in!! Nero breaks free of it quickly but JCM pays it no mind and strikes him in the face with his knee!

 

Arvin: Nero with a throat punch! Gets him with the right, and now throat punch the sequel with his left hand! That's his smoking throat! 

 

Kendra: You can see him gagging a little, but JCM Ace just gets mad and launches Nero with the overhead belly-to-belly! Nero to his feet and gets BLASTED with that 3^rd Ave Forearm! That forearm is usually a sign of binger things to come, JCM scoops Nero up and sure enough we're looking at another Ace Bomb NO Nero slides behind him and Spine Malign!

 

Arvin: The Psycho $upreme is meeting him beat for beat! And he goes for the cover-

 

1!

 

Colin: JCM kicks again! Nero's frustration evident and he's going for a full charge now...JCM RAILS HIM WITH A SPINEBUSTER. JCM Ace takes the offense now and Butterfly Suplex! Pulls Nero into a Bionic Elbow and positively pimp slaps him! The disrespect these two have for each other!

 

Kendra: Nero takes exception and knees JCM in the gut! High kick to the chest! JCM ends that rally quickly and grabs the leg, whipping him down to the ground and a Single Leg Crab NO Nero Reverses it to a Schismatic Strangle!! This is the first time we can see the hint of pain in JCM's eyes! 

 

Arvin: Nero may get his revenge on JCM right here and now! JCM is fading as he tries to move to the ropes, we've got a tug of war situation on our hands here and Nero really relishing the pain that JCM is in-NO! JCM POWERS TO THE ROPES! HOW!

 

Colin: JCM gets his arm on the rope and gets himself under Nero, rising together...ACE BOMB!! Going for the cover-

 

1!

2!

 

Kendra: NERO REVERSES THE PIN!

 

1!

2!

 

Colin: JCM kicks and these fans are absolutely rabid! And Nero to his feet and Nerolyzer once again!! 

 

Arvin: That'll shut them up. Going for the cover to wrap this up.

 

1!

 

 

Colin: SM HEARTBREAKER FROM UNDER THE RING GETS JCM'S FOOT ON THE ROPES!

 

Kendra: SM wasn't part of this and wasn't bound by the pods! 

 

Arvin: That defeats the whole purpose of cutting the entrances.

 

Colin: I actually have to agree with you, and I don't know why Zeke's trap door hasn't just been shut. 

 

Kendra: JCM snap powerslam to Nero! But Nero kicks and rakes JCM's eyes. Oh, JCM does not like that.

 

Colin: When JCM starts mean muggin' I think the safest course of action is to just lay down and give him the win, but of course Nero wouldn't dream of it. JCM huge Scoop Slam! AND HE LOCKS IN THE POMPANO CLUTCH!

 

Kendra: End of the road, Nero.

 

Arvin: Nero is starting to fade and sink into it BUT HE USES WHAT MAY BE HIS LAST ENERGY TO THROW HIMSELF BACKWARDS INTO A PIN ATTEMPT! NO! JCM KICKS! NERO IS PISSED! 

 

Colin: Whoever wins this will have at least one other fight and possibly two! They are putting final round energy into a first round match! Nero elbows JCM in the throat, oh JCM just did the Hogan head turn, I think Nero knows he made a bad move. JCM POWERSLAM TO NERO! PICKING HIM UP AND A SECOND POWERSLAM!

 

Arvin: Nero rakes the eyes to prevent any pin and to his feet, Whipping JCM into the turnbuckle, JCM rebounding back and Nero with a European Uppercut!

 

Kendra: Nero grabs JCM by his locks, making the most grievous of errors, and drags JCM to the turnbuckle! He better hope Ace doesn't get up from this. Getting JCM on the top, climbing up to the Middle...SPINNING SUPLEX! JCM JUST WENT ON A RIDE TO THE VALLEY OF BONES!

 

Colin: And JCM doesn't sleep in the car! European Uppercut to Nero with the right! European Uppercut to Nero with the left! HEADBUTT! And quick hip toss!

 

Kendra: Told you. You done messed up, Nero.

 

Colin: JCM drags Nero to the middle of the ring and POMPANO CLUTCH! POMPANO CLUTCH!! Nero fighting with everything he's got but he's drooping into nothingness. 

 

Andra lifts his arm - it drops.

 

Andra lifting it a second time - it drops.

 

Andra lifting it a third time-it's up! It's up! Nero could be in this Aaaand it drops. 

 

JCM ADVANCES!

 

JCM Ace wins by Submission!

 

 

Ash: Advancing to round 2- JCM ACE!

 

Colin: I think Nero should change his name to Crunchwrap $upreme the way our fighters keep eating him alive.

 

Kendra: JCM getting a chance to breathe now as he re-enters the pod and we have our second match-up.

 

ROUND 1: TRAGEDEIGH VS MOON

 

Ash: Open the pods!

 

 

The bell rings.

 

Colin: Before Tragedeigh has a chance to remove her mask, Moon launches in with a Shoulder Block! 

 

Arvin: Tragedeigh to her feet and a Masked Headbutt to Moon, she was smart to keep her entrance gear. And now she removes the mask. 

 

Kendra: Maybe not so smart to keep the entrance gear, removing it is giving Moon a chance to get to his feet and he gets her with a Belly to Belly! Tragedeigh goes low on Moon on her way up and he doubles up. She...she's cackling at him!

 

Colin: Moon back to his feet and huge chop to Tragedeigh! Tragedeigh responds with a bionic elbow! Moon answers back with a forearm shot and before Tragedeigh can switch it up whips her across the ropes! A Uranage! 

 

Arvin: The Red Queen does not stay down long and whips Moon into the turnbuckle! She's laying into him with that elbow!!

 

Kendra: Moon evades an elbow and turns the tables on her! Going up for the punches-

 

1! 2! 3! 4! 5! 6! 7! 8! 9! 10!!

 

Colin: Tragedeigh a little punch drunk now, Moon continues his onslaught with the BIGGEST CHOP! Tragedeigh was taken off her feet by that! Moon running back and KNEE STRIKE! AND THE TRAPPING HEADBUTTS! Tragedeigh is down!!

 

Kendra: Going for the pin and Tragedeigh kicks up quickly! Moon is shocked by this, but doesn't want to waste time stewing and a quick jumping elbow to keep Tragedeigh down! He walks on her back up towards her head...jumping fist drop to the head! And the knees land in the back!! Moon coming off the ropes and basement dropkick! 

 

Arvin: Moon picks her up and he may be going for the Trapping Headbutts again.. loads it back and leans face first into Gold-Red Mist! Take that! A prince is no match for a queen! CURTAIN CALL!!

 

1!

2!
3!

 

Tragedeigh wins by Pinfall!

 

 

Ash: Advancing to round 2- THE RED QUEEN, TRAGEDEIGH!

 

Colin: And the next match is exactly why we're doing this pod way, so Tragedeigh can't interfere in this next match. 

 

Tragedeigh re-enters her pod.

 

ROUND 1: MAL SANGRE VS JP SPEARS

 

Ash: Open the pods!

 

 

The bell rings.

 

Colin: Mal Sangre wastes no time! Bloodletting Lariat! And a pin!

 

1!

2!

TH...NO!

 

Kendra: Spears gets his shoulder up and Sangre stops him from getting the rest up with a deadlift into a Brainbuster! The only thing scarier than Sangre is an Angry Sangre!

 

Arvin: JP throws a punch back and Sangre responds with throwing Spears off the ropes...HIT STICK!

 

Colin: People need to learn that JP Spears is dangerous in a run. He can get that Hit Stick from anywhere. Going for the cover, but Sangre kicks up quickly. 

 

Arvin: Counterpoint, Spears has to learn to switch up his offense. Going for another Hit Stick but it was predictable, Sangre catches him mid-air and Elevated DDT! Picking Spears up and running Spinebuster towards the corner! JP tries to get up and Mal uses the corner for a swinging low dropkick.

 

Kendra: Going for the stomp out now and JP catches his foot! Trips him down and a Slingshot into the Turnbuckle! JP up but Sangre catches his footing quickly and going full Dusty Rhodes with that elbow combo! JP hunching over from the onslaught, Mal able to get him in prime position for a Flowing Wrath Release Powerbomb! Going for the pin-

 

1!

 

Colin: JP gets his shoulder up! Mal pissed and going in on a stomp out! Keeping JP grounded is a smart move, and Mal off the ropes for a running fist drop! Mal looking for lightning to strike twice, off the ropes again- JP is up and Mal eats boot!!

 

Kendra: Shouldn't have given JP a space to breathe and Mal is paying for it as JP going IN on those hammer punches WHOA SANGRE WITH THE SPIN AND BLOODLETTING LARIAT NUMBER 2! Going for the cover, JP REVERSES!

 

1!

2!

 

Arvin: Mal gets the shoulder up and JP whangs him with a bionic elbow. OH! MAL HAS JP BY THE THROAT, MAL RISING TO HIS FEET, AND A DEVASTATING CHOKESLAM! You can hear JP grunting a bit and Mal could finish him here...Mal picks him up, trying to get something else, trying for the Bloodline's Wrath but Back Body Drop! Mal bounces back up and JP swings around, Russian Leg Sweep! Pulling Mal up, sending him across the ropes and a flapjack! 

 

Colin: That the varied offense you mean?

 

Arvin: Shut up Colin.

 

Kendra: JP going for mounted punches - Mal bites his face! OH! Brutal move and JP stunned...but only for a second, headbutt back! Scoops Mal up and Powerslam! Mal doesn't stay down too long but JP ready for him with that Cena punch combo! JP tries for a ripcord headbutt, MAL WITH AN EXPLODER SUPLEX! JP CRUMPLES IN THE CORNER!

 

Colin: Which also means he's just given JP Spears a runway.

 

Arvin: I think that's what he wanted. See, he's taunting Spears! He's chanting Hit Stick Hit Stick Hit Stick! The crowd seems confused but they're starting to get into it.

 

Kendra: It's a Trap!

 

Arvin: Spears takes the bait, HIIIIT STICK AND MAL SANGRE CATCHES HIM OUT! BLOODLINE'S WRATH!!

 

1!

2!

3!

 

Mal Sangre wins by Pinfall!

 

 

Ash: Advancing to round 2- The Vessel of Wrath, MAL SANGRE!

 

Colin: And the past 30 days have not been good to JP Spears. Lost his title and his woman to James D, and his chance at redemption has just been squashed.

 

Kendra: And of course, we could well be heading to a Sangre/Tragedeigh main event. Lord knows these two are not happy with each other.

 

Mal Sangre re-enters his pod.

 

Arvin: We've got one more pair to work out and then Sangre will be right back out here. 

 

ROUND 1: JAY THE JOKER VS SCREECH

 

Ash: Open the pods!

 

 

The bell rings.

 

Arvin: Jay the Joker may not have had the best start to his time here in the fed, but a quick smash to Manta Ray and a successful attack on Psycho $upremacy has him very cheerful so I think Screech may be in t-why are the lights navy blue?

 

Colin: Well some blues are lighter than others and reflecting on the tron-

 

 

Kendra: Jay the Joker historically not a fan of animals in symbols and it's got him just distracted enough, Screech runs up behind him and ONE ARM BULLDOG!

 

1!

2!

3!

 

Screech wins by Pinfall!

 

 

Ash: Advancing to round 2- SCREECH!

 

ROUND 2: JCM ACE VS MAL SANGRE

 

Ash: Open the pods!

 

 

The bell rings.

 

Arvin: JCM throwing Sangre off the ropes, POWERSLAM! And immediately a Snap DDT, Mal trying to kip up and 3^rd Ave Forearm! Sangre got almost no time to rest! And JCM is taking full advantage of that! 

 

Colin: Sometimes that's just how it goes. ACE BOMB! And the pin-

 

1!

 

Kendra: Mal gets his shoulder up but JCM already putting the pain to him and Single Leg Crab!! Mal contorting his body and victory roll pin! JCM kicks out before the count.

 

Colin: Up we go...ACE BOMB NUMBER 2! 

 

1!

2!

3!

 

JCM Ace wins by Pinfall!

 

 

Ash: Advancing to the finals, JCM ACE!

 

Arvin: Sangre is pissed and I don't blame him! He put on a clinic in the first round just like JCM did, but JCM had all of his match to get his bones rested and Screech gave him all of five seconds of reprieve.

 

Colin: Keep crying, Arvin.

 

Kendra: And Ace telling Sangre exactly what he thinks of him before entering his pod. I believe as SM says, "Meow."

 

ROUND 2: TRAGEDEIGH VS SCREECH

 

Ash: Open the Pods! 

 

 

The bell rings.

 

Kendra: Tragedeigh with a quick punch, Screech returns the punch in kind, Screech going for a second and Tragedeigh catches the arm for an Arm-Trapped DDT!

 

Arvin: That's what happens when you don't wait your turn.

 

Colin: Screech quickly back to his feet, grappling Tragedeigh and lifts her up, RIB BREAKER! Tragedeigh oofs as she goes down. 

 

Kendra: Red Queen getting to her feet, uses Screech for leverage to get up and middle punch to him, he gives an Elbow Shot back in kind.

 

Colin: Tragedeigh looking to end this quickly, grabs the elbow and a Schoolboy Pin, NO, Screech picks her up and Tilt-A-Whirl Backbreaker!! Gets her up and Snap DDT!

 

Arvin: Tragedeigh takes a run and hits the Overture! Trying for the pin, Screech kicks out.

 

Colin: Tragedeigh trying to end this again, going for the schoolgirl-

 

1!

 

Kendra: Screech reverses the pin but Tragedeigh reverses it quickly back-

 

1!

2!

 

 

Arvin: Mal Sangre pushes the roll, Tragedeigh in trouble!

 

1!

2!

3!

 

Screech wins by Pinfall!

 

 

Ash: Advancing to the finals, SCREECH!

 

Colin: And JCM is ready to go! Open the pods!

 

FINAL: JCM ACE VS SCREECH

 

Ash: Open the pod!

 

 

The bell rings.

 

Kendra: JCM not wasting any time! Throwing quick punches to Screech, scooping up Screech and the spin to win...ACE BOMB! Going for a pin-

 

1!

2!

 

Colin: Screech gets the shoulder up. Screech off the ropes, One Arm Bulldog!! Going for the pin, Ace kicks before the count can go.

 

Kendra: Ace gets to his feet but Screech meets him with a Bicycle Kick! Ace stumbles back a tick, but over-the-head belly to belly! Screech quick up to his feet and running DDT! 

 

Colin: These two keeping a frenetic pace, Ace going for the Ace Bomb! Screech rolls back and pulls at the legs of JCM...BROKEN LOCK! Ace struggling now! And he kicks him off. Screech rolls back and up to his feet and catches him with another Bicycle Kick! 

 

Kendra: Neither man wants to stay down too long, Ace up and a huge boot to Screech, putting the spin on Screech! Ace with a belly-to-back! Unbelievable pacing between these two! 

 

Arvin: Screech already up, going for the lariat, Ace ducks and pulls him back for a backbreaker! Ace calling for it...let's go for a ride with the ACE BOMB!!

 

1!

2!

3!

 

JCM Ace wins by Pinfall!

 

 

Ash: Here is your winner and going on to TAXIDERBY, JCM ACE!

 

 

Arvin: JCM Ace motioning for the belt around his waist. And he grabs a mic, what's the dude gonna say.

 

The music dies down for a second. The crowd hushes. And then-

 

JCM Ace: I'M- COMIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIING! 

 

The crowd pops HARD and JCM raises his hand in triumph!

 

Colin: And he is sounding the war horns. JCM Ace could go on to be a rare Triple Crowner in MAWL, maybe even more. A win at Taxiderby would certainly put him on the path. And on Taxiderby, our next match is scheduled to clean up the confusion from last week as 50 Cent is scheduled to take on WildFire and see who will be left facing Balor Wolfe for the Mania Title. Cristel backstage is looking to speak with WildFire now. Cristel? 

 

 

WildFire is backstage stretching before his match he is wearing some ear buds.

 

"Blah blah blah blah blah"

 

WildFire continues stretching.

 

"Blah blah blah blah !"

 

WildFire practises his breathing.

 

"Blah !! BLah !! Blahhh !!"

 

WildFire :"??"

 

He turns off his earbuds and stands up looking around.

 

 

Cristel: "So what are your thoughts on upcoming match against 50 Cent?"

 

WildFire : "First of All, RUUUUDE !! I mean, here I am chilling getting ready for said match, and you come along interupting me, I assume you have eyes and stuff. I mean even a blind man could see I was busy."

 

WildFire : Second of All, 50 Cent,Wow what a beast.." he says sarcastically " What is he some Gangsta Rapper?"

 

WildFire : Ya he's big and Powerful, a real powerhouse, but I've walked through bigger men then him on the way to the real fight, and this time will be no different. "

 

WildFire : "He got lucky enough to stand in the same ring as me, let alone get the lame pinning attempt on me, and I DO MEAN ATTEMPT. But business is business and rematches mean big bucks, which with a name like 50 cent I don't think he sees a Hell of a lot of." WildFire : "But even lucky SOB's like 50 never get lucky 3 times in a row. And Tonight I am going Hit that 50 over and over again, and then with a 1, 2 , 3 .."

 

Slaps the wall 3x

 

WildFire : End his LUCKY STREAK !!!"

 

WildFire shoos away the Interviewer and turns his ear buds back on.

 

 

Colin: (flatly) WildFire is always a pleasure.

 

 

Kendra: To be fair, interrupting someone wearing their headphones IS rude.

 

 

Arvin: You know what else is rude? Having side conversations on your radio when you're meant to be commenting on a match.

 

 

Balor: *unintelligible whispering into a radio, Balor waves Arvin off*

 

Arvin: Very cool, champ.

 

Colin: Well, on we go.

 

WILDFIRE VS 50 CENT

 

Ding ding ding!

 

 

Ash: The following contest is scheduled for one fall, and the winner will go on to fight Balor Wolfe at Taxiderby!

 

Balor Wolfe gives a cursory wave to the fans then folds his hands in front of himself. 

 

 

50 Cent "I Get Money" plays over the speakers as the Titantron shows Money Signs. Green and Gold pyro goes off and 50 comes out, holding his chains out and shouting to the roaring approval of the fan base. 

 

 

50 walks with intention down the ring, pointing to his opponents and Diddy in particular, and intermittently beating his chest as many in the crowd sing along to the theme. 

 

Ash: From Houston, Texas, weighing in at 215 pounds, 50 CENT!

 

 

"I Wanna Rock " By Twisted Sister plays  The Titantron goes all white, as the name "WildFire" is displayed on the main screen, before he makes an appearance
                  "Better than the Best!!!", "!2 out of 10 !!!", "8 stars out of 5 !!!","Simply the Greatesr EVER!!!"
                  WildFire charges out of the crowd sliding into the ring in a Ja Rule Jersey.

 

 

Ash: From Edmonton, Alberta, Canada, weighing in at 225 pounds, WildFire!

 

WildFire kneels in the center of the ring both arms raised. Fireworks Explode from the 4 ring posts.

 

Colin: WildFire is as good at getting in your head as he is beating you in the ring. And he's very much in the head of 50, who charges him for a clothesline and WildFire with the duck, gets behind 50, inverted DDT! Stomp to the face of 50, and going ham as the kids say.

 

Kendra: Bro. No. 

 

Arvin: 50 grabs the foot and pushes Wild back, back to his feet! Deadlift to Wild and SPINEBUSTER! Looking to wrap quickly-

 

1!

 

Kendra: Wild with the shoulder up! And he gets a headlock in on 50! Working that neck and 50 grunting. 50 fighting to his feet...50 with a Fisherman Suplex! Up to the top turnbuckle and a Diving Leg Drop! You can see Wild's legs bounce with the impact! 

 

Colin: It may surprise people to know that 50 is a gifted high flyer by nature but he can get you from any angle. Going for the pin, Wild's shoulder up before even a 1. 

 

Arvin: He didn't hook the leg or provide any cover beyond the leg strike, whaddya expect. Wild grabs the leg and he's looking to lock in an STF. 

 

Kendra: You're gonna have to get 50 to pass out, he doesn't tap for almost anyone. 

 

Arvin: Wild's gonna have to change up his strategy. 

 

Balor: *unintelligible whispering into the radio*

 

Alastor (OC): *unintelligible whispering from the radio*

 

Colin: Even if it's not endgame it'll help weaken 50 down. 50 gets to the ropes, Wild lets the hold go and comes off the ropes, coming back around and a boot to 50. Wild riding him on the 2nd rope with a choke! Wild springs over the ropes and a leg drop! 

 

Kendra: WildFire getting in the face of the audience now and Andra starts the count!

 

1!

 

Colin: It would be truly unfortunate to lose a shot at the title due to count out. WildFire really having it out now with one of the fans! 

 

2!

 

Kendra: 50 LAUNCHES HIMSELF OUT OF THE RING WITH A SPLASH TO WILDFIRE! WILD IS SANDWICHED INTO THE BARRICADE!

 

Balor: *unintelligible whispering into the radio*

 

Colin: Balor you're missing a hell of a match.

 

Balor gives him a side-eye then returns to the radio, where Alastor is saying...something.

 

Arvin: So rude.

 

Colin: 50 throws him back in the ring, Military Press and WILDFIRE REVERSES INTO A VICTORY ROLL!

 

1!

2!

 

Kendra: 50 kicks! Wild off the ropes now and basement boot to 50! Picking him up and the drag, smashing 50's head into that turnbuckle! He's tried the submit em, he's tried the pin em, now he's going for the bleed em! He signals to the crowd an X5? What? Going for the head smashes with his left hand and motioning "5" with his right...

 

5! 10! 15! 20! 25! 30! 35! 40! 45! 50! 

 

Arvin: Clever. Clever.

 

Colin: 50 Cent is indeed bleeding! His plan is starting to come to fruition! A giant wind-up headbutt by Wild and 50 BLOCKS IT WITH HIS FIST! WILDFIRE JUST WOUND HIMSELF INTO GETTING PUNCHED! 50 THROWS WILDFIRE OFF THE ROPES AND PUMPHANDLE POWERBOMB! HE'S SIGNALING FOR IT...

 

50 lifts WildFire for the Last Ride — the crowd rises. This is it.

 

But from underneath the ring, two hands grab his ankles.

 

 

 

 Diddy.

The man who has haunted him for months now.

 

50 stumbles, loses grip. WildFire collapses on top.

 

Ref counts.

 

1… 2… 3.

 

Colin McRae
"No—no way! 50’s legs were under the ropes! That shouldn’t count!"

 

Kendra Mavis
"Diddy cost 50 the win! And WildFire… I don’t think he even knows!"

 

WildFire staggers to his feet, disoriented but triumphant. He raises his hands. His music plays.

 

He looks to the crowd, to the heavens, to the ring posts…

 

Then he looks to ringside.

 

There sits Balor Wolfe.

 

Legs crossed.

 

The MAWL Championship across his lap like a burden.

 

One hand resting on a crackling, dusty old radio.

 

He hasn’t said a word all night.

 

But now, the radio hisses.

 

ALASTOR (clear and slow):
“He’s shown you what happens when you dance in the dark. Now show them what happens when they forget who lit the fire.”

 

Balor stands.

 

Takes the radio. Places it gently on the commentary table.

 

Colin:
"Guys… he’s coming. And it’s not for gold. It’s for judgment."

 

Balor enters the ring without urgency.

 

WildFire turns, smiling—thinking it’s a show of respect.

 

Balor tilts his head. No smile. No rage.

Just the silence of a man acting on instructions only he can hear.

 

Lights Out.

WildFire falls. The crowd gasps. A hush falls.

 

Kendra:
"He didn’t even hesitate. Like he’s moving to a rhythm only he understands."

 

50 rolls into the ring now, red-hot with fury. Shouting at Balor.

 

50 Cent:
"You think this is about you?! You think you got a right to be here?!"

 

Balor simply steps forward. One step. Then another.

 

No words.

 

Another Lights Out.

Precise. Unavoidable. Surgical.

 

Arvin Wallace (whispering):
"This isn't a man. This is a reckoning."

 

Diddy climbs in with that infamous grin — clapping like he’s in on it.

 

He holds out a bottle of champagne with theatrical flair.

 

Diddy:
"Now that’s what I’m talkin’ about! Come on, let’s drink to dominance! Let’s toast, champ!"

 

Balor takes the bottle.

 

Holds it in both hands.

 

Studies it like it’s a relic.

 

Then, he leans down, and whispers into Diddy’s ear.

 

We don’t hear it.

 

Diddy’s face drops.

 

Then—Lights Out.

 

And this time, Balor doesn't walk away right away.

 

Balor kneels beside Diddy. The crowd is dead silent now.

 

He uncorks the bottle.

 

Sniffs.

 

Pauses.

 

Balor (to Diddy’s unconscious body):
"You wanted to toast with kings. You brought this?"

 

He tips the bottle over slowly, letting the champagne spill across Diddy’s chest, like anointing oil.

 

He then places the bottle on Diddy’s sternum, like a tombstone over a grave.

 

Balor stands.

 

The crowd begins to chant, unsure, almost afraid:

“Balor… Balor… Balor…”

 

The radio comes to life.

 

ALASTOR (voice now booming):
“Three offerings. Three reminders.
The silence is not mercy.
It is the sound of the end arriving on time.”

 

The lights go black.

 

When they return—
Balor Wolfe, his championship, and the radio are gone.

 

Only three bodies remain.

 

And the bottle.

 

 

Shakti: What's cooking in Cairo, everyone? It's Shakti here with the next set of updates for MAWL Madness 2. So this is going to be a sort of different in some ways update...we still have covers and DLC and all that to discuss but we also have some news. So I actually want to start with that. 

 

Recent developments have happened where we've needed to reconfigure our Face of Fear DLC from the ground up. This does unfortunately mean a delay in the game by two months and we do want to apologize to you all for that, but we felt it important to be sure we can give you the best content possible. We do know the direction we're taking with it and we're going to give you the skinny on that in our next update but I'll say for now that many of you pre-2025 fans will be pretty thrilled with the direction we are going to take.

 

The other developments that have caused a slight delay are for much better reason...we've figured out how to give you up to 16 players at once! That sounds truly insane, I know...but it's going to be so worth it. With that comes the following updated match types-

• Four Chambers Match
• Fatal Four Corners Stables Match
• Ice Bath Match
• Tag Rumble
• RBI Match
• Bloodstar Tag and Trios Matches
• Tag and Elimination Tag Matches up to 8 v 8

 

AH! I'm truly excited. Okay, so now quickly onto our covers and DLC and then we'll get you back into the flow. This time we're looking over to PS5.

 

 

Shakti: For our PS5 variants, we have the inimitable Tragedeigh on the Standard, Blood Drawn on the Deluxe, Thor and Tino Sabatelli on the Mania, and Wonderwolf and WildFire on the Face of Fear, making WildFire the only star to be represented twice. 

 

Of course, this all comes with some solid DLC! 

 

 

Shakti: Some of our newer superstars will finally be playable with the Shadowbane Pack! Come face to face with the newest members of La Family! Deal with the brutality that is Shadowbane! AND get truly decimated in the new Apothecary Match!!

 

 

Shakti: Ever wonder how some of your favorites looked and acted before they came to MAWL? Did you know that Johnny Dagger used to team up with Glen Leven? Want to reenact Kalpana's attack on Razi back in Nepal? Now you can! AND you can re-separate the Four Brands that make up the new MAWL! 

 

We'll reveal our new iteration of the Face of Fear Packs at Taxiderby, as well as our SWITCH 2 Covers!! Stay tuned! Back to you!

 

 

Colin: I'm not going to give spoilers away but I am just going to say thank you to MAWL Madness 2, I very much enjoyed the trip down memory lane.

 

 

Kendra: I'm going to be slightly more spoilerific and say that I loved having the chance to talk about some people that I had only watched before. It was a very cool experience. 

 

 

Arvin: (shrug) I loved the extra pay.

 

Colin: Such a sentimental one you are.

 

Kendra: So MAWL Madness 2, y'all, now coming out in July, the extra wait is hella worth it. 

 

Colin: But let's not keep our fans waiting for the next match, aye?

 

TABLES MATCH

CHARLOTTE REALTA VS BOWEN VS TYLER HAYES

 

Ding ding ding!

 

 

Ash: The following contest is a TABLES Match! The winner will be decided when an opponent is put through a Table!

 

 

As "The Pretender" blares through the stadium, the crowd erupts in excitement. The lights above flash green and gold, creating a vibrant spectacle. The crowd loses their minds.

 

 

Ash: First! From Adelaide, Australia, weighing in at 220 pounds, TYYYYLER! HAYYYYYES!

 

Despite getting hit by a briefcase last week, he doesn't break stride for the fans. He makes his way down through the crowd making sure to shake hands with anyone who wants it. He signs an autograph for a fan at the front of the barrier, jumps over the barricade and does a lap of the ring smacking the crowds hands as he comes around, he shakes hands with the commentators, slides into the ring and shakes hands with the ref.

 

Arvin: Having all his personal stuff destroyed AND Cassandra Cash hitting him with a briefcase last week can't break this dude, I don't know what will.

 

 

Music hit as Bowen comes through the curtains, he stands just 2 steps in front of the curtains hands clasped at his waist head down.

 

 

He stands just 2 steps in front of the curtains hands clasped at his waist head down. Till the words kick in raises head makes way down to ringside with a slow methodical walk as Survival of The Fittest blasts.

 

Ash: And his opponent! From Queens, New York, weighing in at 240 pounds, BOOOOWEN BAAAANECLAW!

 

Arvin: And this man's got truck with Tyler, ripping on him for being soft earlier. And no doubt he's got beef with Charlotte for manipulating him. 

 

Kendra: He doesn't just have a chip on his shoulder, he has a whole damn bag of em.

 

Once at the ring Bowen climbs the steps makes his way to the center of the apron turns to face the crowd throws a hand in the air before entering the ring. Makes way to other side of the ring and again throws a hand in the air. Then removes hoodie and chain and puts it in his corner.

 

 

Red fireworks shoot out from the jumbotron as fireworks continue to cascade down the walkway, a final large red firework goes off and Charlotte appears within the smoke to a rain of boos.

 

 

Ash: First! From Outerspace, CHARLOTTE REALTA!

 

She cackles maniacally, enjoying the crowd's hatred as she enters the ring itself.

 

The bell rings.

 

Colin: Bowen and Tyler looking at each other, and a double suplex to Charlotte. She's really made herself a target at this point. Bowen with a scoop slam to Charlotte, picks her back up and piledriver! Charlotte rolls out, and Bowen turns his attention to Tyler. 

 

Kendra: Bowen with a running chop block to Tyler! And a leg whip now! Bowen focusing on Tyler's right leg, going with a knee smash. And another knee smash. Bowen's playing to his strength, which is find and locate a place to destroy.

 

Colin: It's interesting that these two wrestlers, more suited to submission than brutality, are in this match. This is not a huge strength for either of them. 

 

Arvin: Charlotte is the most in advantage here, and she rolls back in with a barbed wire bat! Swing to the back of Bowen! Swing to the gut of Hayes! Going for the head of Bowen now, Bowen ducks and a swinging punch combo to the gut of Charlotte. Pushing Charlotte back, throwing her across the ring and Tyler hits her with a boot! Bowen doesn't learn the relevant lesson and charging to Tyler, Tyler catches him with a Spinebuster!

 

Kendra: Tyler with a big stomp to Bowen, Charlotte trying to sneak up behind Bowen and Bowen catches her out with a back elbow and a judo flip! He lands her on top of Bowen! Wrapping them both into a Figure Four at once!! 

 

Colin: It's not gonna get a win for him but weakening their legs will make it easier to get them off their feet. And watching them both flail is an added bonus. 

 

Arvin: You can see the wear on his face holding them both to task like this and he lets go. Bowen and Charlotte both kick at Tyler at the same time, whip him off the ropes, and back body drop to the outside! Charlotte with a headbutt! Bowen stuttering back a bit and Charlotte grabs his hair, drives his head into her knee! Picking his head up, and ANOTHER smash into her knee! It's like he's bobbing for apples and only finding pain! 

 

Kendra: She's going for the smash again, but he sweeps her leg out! And stomping on her left leg! I'm noticing a theme here!

 

Arvin: Yeah, too bad it's not a broken leg match otherwise they'd all be doing what they need to do.

 

Colin: Bowen slingshots Charlotte into the turnbuckle! And she rebounds into his arms for a German Suplex! Tyler trying to get back into the ring and-an Ethernet Cat o' Nine Tails to his leg! His head hits the apron!

 

 

Kendra: The hell is she doing out here?! Her match isn't until this is over!

 

Arvin: She gives a thumbs up to Charlotte...looks like she's decided to provide some assistance! And she's now whipping Tyler with those cords! He knows he likes it.

 

Colin: This is truly disturbing and Tyler can't catch a break. 

 

Kendra: Last week it was Cassandra Cash. Now it's Donna Matrix. What is causing the women to snap at him?

 

Arvin: I mean, come on, Dude's a MEOWBoi. 

 

Colin: Turning our attention to the ring, Charlotte hits a chin breaker and off the ropes to come back with an elbow drop. Charlotte's got him up by the hair and setting him up for the T-Bone, we could be getting a Maximum Starburst and NO! Bowen with a Back Body Drop! Bowen going back to focus on her leg again and a leg DDT! Pulls her up and a Scoop Slam!

 

Kendra: Tyler kicks Matrix away and climbing back to the Apron, attempting to get back in the ring and NO! She German Suplexes him off the apron!! 

 

Arvin: Bowen coming off the ropes and going for a Leg Drop, but NO! Charlotte rolls out of the way! Charlotte pulls him up and MAXIMUM STARBURST! Donna going under the apron and Tyler starting to punch her away from it! Tyler Irish Whips Donna Matrix to the barricade and he's heading back to the Apron, trying to get back in the ring to his planned match, Matrix goes back under the apron and pulls out a table! She's giving a look to Charlotte and Charlotte seems to nod back in response, DONNA SETS UP THE TABLE! Charlotte Hammer Throwing Bowen in their direction and TYLER CATCHES BOWEN! THEY BOTH FALL BACKWARD AND BOWEN GOES THROUGH THE TABLE!! TYLER...WINS?

 

A silence as the referee surveys the scene, then she raises Tyler's hand!

 

Colin: That seems to be the ruling, yes! I'm not sure what's happened here, and I don't really think anyone does, but Donna and Charlotte sure don't look happy. Tyler's definitely a little confused.

 

Tyler Hayes wins with a modified back body drop!

 

 

Ash: Here is your winner, TYLER HAYES!

 

Colin: Donna and Charlotte not taking this well, and they stomp out Bowen! Tyler tries to get them away, double flapjack to Tyler! Charlotte pulls Tyler up, Donna has the whip and she's LAYING INTO TYLER! Those ethernet cords right across his bare chest!

 

Kendra: You can hear each cable make its own impact as they lay into Tyler's chest and he grunts in pain. Donna winds up the Whip...FIRES IT INTO HIS CHEST AGAIN! Nine separate cords crackling like a row of Roman Candles! Tyler growls in pain! 

 

Colin: Wait-

 

 

Kendra: DINAH SOAR IS HERE AND SHE IS WASTING NO TIME GOING ABSOLUTELY HAM ON DONNA MATRIX! 

 

Colin: She throws Donna in the ring and she wants to get this match going!

 

DONNA MATRIX VS DINAH SOAR

 

Ding ding ding!

 

Colin: Dinah with the Thesz Press and she's just absolutely unloading on Donna. Lefts and rights everywhere! Dinah pulls Donna up, Irish Whip and a HUGE Back Body Drop! The crowd is loving it! Dinah throwing Donna across the ropes again, Donna comes back and a Huracanrana! Donna up quickly but Dinah with an arm drag! Dinah comes off the ropes and Charlotte grabs her ankle!!

 

Arvin: You scratch my back I scratch yours. But Andra is having none of it.

 

 

Kendra: Andra telling Charlotte to go backstage, and-

 

 

Kendra: SM Heartbreaker is here and he has Donna's whip! He...he's handing it off to Dinah Soar! Dinah feeling it in her hands, she's considering it, you can see the hesitation in her face, and SM signaling for her to go! She turns around, she's got a clear shot! She...she might actually do it!

 

The fans chant: "Stay Good! Stay Good! Stay Good!"  Dinah takes a breath now and looking at SM, and then the fans, and then the whip, and then the fans again.

 

Arvin: Wow! What a bunch of goody two shoes in this audience! You're all doofuses!

 

Colin: Dinah truly struggling with the choice here. She...tosses the whip aside! The fans support this decision! 

 

Arvin: SM H saying SMH as he leaves. Dinah may have made the right call for the fans but she sure didn't for herself and she turns around right into a low blow kick by Donna! Facebuster! Donna Matrix just sent Dinah through the Rabbithole! Andra turns around-

 

1!

2!

3!

 

Donna Matrix wins by Pinfall!

 

 

Ash: Here is your winner, Donna Matrix!

 

Arvin: Dinah should have listened to SM Heartbreaker.

 

Colin: Well, there's different thoughts on that.

 

 

Colin: Oh boy. What do these guys want?

 

Kendra: Show some love, it was just last week they got betrayed by Gina Thieso. Hopefully this will be a positive for them.

 

Tino steps out of his limo puffing his cigar. He straightens his jacket. 

 

 

Stepping out of the limo next is Soldat. Soldat has a mic in hand.

 

 

Soldat: Hey now. Listen up and listen good, MAWL. Last week, we had a...break...in the family chain. I can assure you that we don't take breaks lightly here. To show you what happens when there's a break, we got someone who's gonna take all you to task, both legally and aggressivly. Gina, you were like a sister to me. And if my sister ever crossed me I'd find someone to set her straight too. It is only with the blessing of our Don the wise Papa that we have vetted the person who's gonna take the case, take your place, and break your face. Alessia. Roooooomano!

 

 

Alessia: Thank you, Soldat. Now I have it on good au-

 

 

Kalpana and Imogen walk out to boos.

 

 

Kalpana: Do you now? Do you have it on "good authority", you Senile Cobweb-Ass MEOW? 

 

The audience did NOT approve of that word. Good job Censor Cat!

 

Imogen: Your limo is in OUR parking spot. Now frankly you are wasting good camera time that should have gone to us. These are two strikes. And honestly, that outfit is a third. 

 

Imogen and Kalpana each take an arm of Alessia and drag her to the ring to heavy torrential Boos.

 

Kendra: Oh, come on now. 

 

Imogen: The only way you can break someone's face is if they have to kiss on you a date. 

 

Kalpana: And the only Place you should be taking, Grandma, is a bed in a retirement home. 

 

Imogen: Now we're gracious and magnanimous, so what we're gonna do is give you a makeover.

 

Kalpana and Imogen hoist Alessia into the ring. They take off her suit jacket.

 

Colin: This is just unnecessary.

 

They next rip off the blouse to reveal the top half of a wrestling singlet.

 

Arvin: Looks like someone came to fight!

 

Alessia hits Kalpana in the face with a forearm, then hits Imogen in the face with a forearm. She alternates twice more then hoists Kalpana up over her head.

 

Kendra: She's got her in a Military Press...F5!!! Imogen trying to leave the ring now...Military Press...F5!!! Alessia Romano is the perfect mix of brains and brawns, and these two just learned a very important lesson about prejudgment! 

 

Alessia: AS I WAS SAYING, I have it on good authority from my clients, Tino Sabatelli et al, to introduce the other member of our team. LUIS DIAZ! 

 

 

Luis Diaz storms to the ring, a hush of awe falling over the crowd.

 

Colin: I've heard of this guy, and I feel bad for whatever team has to face them.

 

Alessia: And will be facing the team of...EAK! Apparently. O...kay then.

 

Kendra: Tino and Soldat at the entrance, Luis and Alessia at the ring, I'd be very careful now if I were-

 

Zeke the Sneak and Deke the Freak pop out from opposite sides of the ring and enter.

 

 

Kendra: ...I always forget about the trap door.

 

LUIS DIAZ AND ALESSIA ROMANO VS EAK!

 

Ding ding ding!

 

Alessia immediately steps out of the ring and to the commentary booth.

 

Colin: Wait...aren't you fighting?

 

Alessia: What? No. Why would I do that? I had my fun for the day.

 

Kendra: Didn't you say "we'll be fighting EAK!"

 

Alessia: No, I said *will* be fighting EAK! This is Luis's fight.

 

LUIS DIAZ VS EAK!

 

Arvin: So you're just going to leave your partner in there?

 

Alessia: Shh, shh, just watch.

 

Luis strikes lightning fast. He comes off the ropes with a bicycle kick to Zeke, a knee strike to Deke, a springboard dropkick to Zeke, they charge him and he hits them both with a Muay Thai Roundhouse Kick. He covers them both.

 

1!

2!

3!

 

Luis Diaz wins by Pinfall!

 

 

Ash: Here is your winner, Luis Diaz!

 

Colin: ...Damn.

 

Alessia (smiling): The defense rests. 

 

 

Gozu wanders into the Wadsworth Atheneum Museum of Art, carefully taking in the pictures.

 

 

Gozu admires Hans Holbein's Portrait of Henry VIII when-

 

Tourist #3: Not many people know this, but this portrait was a gift from Henry VIII to his 5th wife, Anne of Glaives.

 

Gozu's eye twitches for a second.

 

 

Gozu with a Sky High Release Chokeslam off the Turret!

 

Gozu (looking at the camera): Her name was Anne of Cleves, not Glaives, and she was the fourth Wife, not the fifth.

 

 

Colin: I can't tell if Gozu would be the best or worst tour guide.

 

 

Kendra: I would think as long as you let him do the talking you'll be fine.

 

 

Arvin: I think I could out-tour-guide him. 

 

Colin: I wouldn't hate seeing you try, especially somewhere with a turret. 

 

Arvin: What's our next match.

 

WONDERWOLF VS SUPERSTAR DAVY BOY VS SOLEMN GUARDIAN

 

Ding ding ding!

 

 

Ash: The following triple threat match is scheduled for one fall!

 

 

Arena Lights go out, while heavy fog starts filling the entrance ramp, Wonderwolf's logo flashes over the screen, and an introductory video starts playing, as Wonderwolf makes his way to the ring.

 

 

Ash: From Amsterdam, Netherlands, weighing 200 pounds, the Asylum Champion, WONDERWOLF!

 

The light go out and a spotlight hits the center of the ring where Wonderwolf starts howling.

 

 

Black smoke covers the front view. No one is there? The crowd hums for a few seconds-

 

A purple doorway appears on the other side of the arena, and Solemn Guardian enters.

 

 

Ash: And! From Huntington, West Virginia, weighing in at 165 pounds, he is The Solemn Guardian!

 

The Solemn Guardian makes his way slowly down the ramp, black and purple smoke surrounding the enclosure making it seem almost as if he is descending.

 

 

Davy Boy fixes his sunglasses and does a Ric Flair strut while giving a quick kiss to his title belt. 

 

 

Ash: From Los Angeles, California, weighing in at 235 pounds, one half of the MAWL Tag Champions, Superstar Davy Boy!

 

He continues the Flair Strut down the ramp, adjusting his sunglasses and adding a little pop into the strut. The fans boo and he threatens to smack them.

 

The bell rings.

 

Colin: Triple Threats always run into the problem of who you go for, whoever you don't you're risking going for you. Davy and Wolf whipping Guardian off the ropes and double arm-whip. Davy Boy takes Solemn and launches him out of the ring.

 

Kendra: That's how you gotta play it. Keep one person out of the ring at any given time. And keeping Solemn away from the action is smart. Wolf behind Davy and Cobra Clutch Suplex! Wolf gets an Ankle Lock in on Davy, Davy kangaroo kicks him off almost immediately and Wolf gets propelled back, running off the ropes and Davy going for a lariat, Wolf ducks it and keeps running, back around for a jumping DDT, NO! DAVY WITH A BEAR HUG SLAM! 

 

Arvin: Guardian coming up on the turnbuckle and a double axe handle to Davy! Turning around and Wolf with a gut kick, Fisherman DDT! Wolf props himself on the middle turnbuckle, up to the top, going for the Diving Headbutt SOLEMN GUARDIAN CATCHES HIM WITH THE HOLY PRECIPICE STUNNER! Going for the pin-

 

1!

2!

 

Colin: Davy Boy deadlifts Guardian off Wolf with a German Suplex! Davy Boy inverted powerslam to Wolf. Davy on a rampage now, short arm lariat to Guardian, catches Wolf with a Uranage! 

 

Kendra: Neither of them staying down long enough for Davy to capitalize on either. Davy going for the West Coast Stunner on Wolf and he nails it! Going for the cover-

 

1!

 

Arvin: That was way too soon to do that, Solemn is still on his feet and he grabs Davy by the back of his throat, REVERSE CHOKESLAM ONTO WONDERWOLF! Rolling Davy off Wolf and going for the pin himself-

 

1!

 

Colin: Wolf kicks! Wolf out to the apron and coming back in with Springboard DDT on Guardian! Picks him up and Death Valley Driver! Davy Boy grabs a chair from the outside and wedges it between the middle and bottom turnbuckles. Up to the apron and Wonderwolf is waiting for him!! Wonderwolf with some head punches and slams his head into the post! Wonderwolf up to the top turnbuckle and he grabs Davy Boy with him! Setting him up and PILEDRIVERS HIM INTO THAT CHAIR! 

 

Kendra: Solid move by Wolf BUT GUARDIAN GETS HIS ATTENTION AND HOLY PRECIPICE!

 

1!

2!

3!

The Solemn Guardian wins by Pinfall!

 

 

Ash: Here is your winner, the Solemn Guardian!

 

Kendra: Solemn Guardian has a way of sniping a win from people. 

 

Arvin: He's a sleazy little wicket. 

 

Colin: Ummm. Sure. Anyway. We just saw Wonderwolf fight and now we're going to find out who is gonna take him on at Taxiderby!

 

ASYLUM TITLE FIRST CONTENDER

GENESIS VS DANIEL VS EL CERRADOR VS QUESTION MARK VRAAG

 

Ding ding ding!

 

Ash: The following Fatal Four Way is scheduled for one fall!

 

 

The arena is bathed in warm golden and red lights, colors that symbolize strength, passion, and Mexican pride. As the song builds, flickers of green, white, and red (the colors of the Mexican flag) pulse across the arena, giving the entrance a nationalistic touch while highlighting his connection to his roots. Smoke & Fog: As the music picks up, a thick fog fills the entrance ramp. Through the haze, El Cerrador emerges.

 

 

His silhouette is now visible—tall, powerful, and purposeful.

 

Ash: First! From Tepito, Mexico City, weighing 245 pounds, EL CERRRRRRADOR!

 

 

Loud-repeating booms fills the arena with big letter ‘D’ showing up in the titantron before it changes to ‘Daniel’ as the soundtrack Waiting - Not Forgotten played ( https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=w3HP8bog39Q ) through the PA.
Daniel walks slowly in his long coat through the ramp down to the ring. 

 

 

His eyes are fixed and focused, locking on to his opponent. He climbs the steel stair and enters the ring through the 2nd rope. Finally he’s posing his Destroyer’s Roar with loud big banged pyros from the turnbuckle behind him.

 

Ash: From Moultree County, Illinois, weighing 284 pounds, DANIEL!

 

 

The lights go dim with exception of question marks floating around in diffierent colors. The crowd boos. Question Mark comes out beating his chest. 

 

 

Ash: From Nijmegen, Netherlands, weighing in at 207 pounds, representing Team SuperStarz, QUESTION MARK VRAAG!

 

Kendra: And this is the man who's been on WonderWolf's case for weeks upon weeks now, he's looking for a chance to get him for himself. 

 

Colin: And there's one person left, and Daniel is seeking him intently.

 

 

The lights completely go black with lightning bolt symbols going around the arena.

 

 

Ash: And, from a land beyond time, weighing your sins against your soul and determining judgment, GENESIS THE DESTROYER!

 

The bell rings.

 

Colin: The match getting started and Genesis and Daniel are immediately unloading on each other, Genesis throwing solid rights and Daniel giving em right back, Daniel boots Genesis right out of the ring and the two of them brawling at the outside, Genesis taking Daniel to the barricade and Daniel arm whips him over! Genesis somersaults back over the barricade and hip press on Genesis! El Cerrador debating if he should springboard over, Question with the RUNNING LOW DROPKICK! 

 

Arvin: Cutting El Cerrador down at the knees, and Blockbuster! He calls this The Stumper! Going for the pin-

 

1!

2!

3!

 

Question Mark Vraag wins by Pinfall!

 

 

Ash: Here is your winner, Question Mark Vraag!

 

Kendra: And El Cerrador made the most cardinal of mistakes, do not turn your back on the people in the ring. With that mistake, Question will finally get his hands on the man he wanted to team with and now wants to destroy. 

 

Genesis enters the ring.

 

Genesis: DANIEL. OSLANOVICH. WE ARE UNFINISHED.

 

Colin: Daniel is entering the ring, and the bell rings! We have an unexpected one on one!

 

DANIEL VS GENESIS

 

Kendra: Genesis throws him across the ring and going for the boot, Daniel ducks, Genesis expecting Daniel to bounce across the other rope but Daniel quickly turns on his heel and BIG BANG!

 

1!

2!

3!

 

Daniel wins by Pinfall!

 

 

Ash: Here is your winner, DANIEL!

 

Colin: Daniel gets a quick win but HERE COMES GENESIS! GENESIDE! GENESIDE NUMBER 2! GENESIDE NUMBER 3!! Really putting the screws to the torso of Daniel!! And a Chokeslam!! The officials trying to break this up, let's hear from the competitors in our next match.

 

 

No flashy entrance. No BOOOOMania! No 90s Dance Track.

 

Just SM HeartBreaker

 

And a chair.

 

And a microphone.

 

In a deep underground place, that is dark and abandoned for some time by the looks of it. SM HeartBreaker is sat in the middle of an old ring. So it definitely has held wrestling shows. It must be hidden in some desert in Arizona or something.

 

SM: SlowMo Tapout.

 

SM HeartBreaker with a serious tone and manner looks directly into the camera.

 

SM: You and I both recognise this place. This to everyone else wat hing is just some forgotten wrestling ring. But to me and you, this was the beginning. This place was the first ever place you was able to lace up your wrestling boots. The first place you ever picked up a microphone and spoke. To me however....

 

SM HeartBreaker signals to the empty seats that haven't been sat on for many years.

 

SM: To me this was the only place people cheered for me. This was the only place I was loved. The only place I have ever heard an SM chant.

 

SM HeartBreaker focuses back onto the camera, addressing one person and one person only.

 

SM: This is the place we first met and you hung me to that ceiling, bleeding...

 

SM HeartBreaker points to the ceiling before pointing to the mat.

 

SM: My blood filled this ring. The zealots watched in shock. It was that moment that made this place. But that was a long time ago, we are two different people now. The zealots that loved me. They no longer can be heard. You are no longer that rookie. We have both walked different paths and unfortunately for you, it has led you back to me. In MAWL. In a one on one match.

 

SM HeartBreaker smiles to help self upon the irony of what he is about to say.

 

SM: I already know it won't be a one versus one. I fully expect the currency Cartel to appear. I expect one of my many enemies to appear. I expect to be at a disadvantage again. Just like that day in this ring.

 

SM HeartBreaker, man who has been in more stables than you can count and has done more despicable things than you can imagine, smiles as he knows he is once again the prey.

 

SM: But you see, even though the odds are stacked against me. You forget that I wrote every single trick in the book. Every play you make, i would have done it and perfected it. Every cheat move. Every underhanded tactic. Every winning formula. I perfected it before you even knew it existed.

 

That's the cheating scumbag SM HeartBreaker that we know and love.

 

SM: But tonight will be different SlowMo Tapout. Because tonight I don't have thousands of loyal, blood thirsty zealots cheering my name. I don't have thousands of fans who I'd *meowing* die for. Instead I have tens of thousands of MAWL fans Booing their hearts out because they know better than anyone what I am capable of.

 

*SM HeartBreaker leans back on his chair as he continues his monologue.*

 

**SM: These fans dislike me because they know I will do anything to achieve what I want and I want is simple.**

 

*SM HeartBreaker puts his serious face back on as he leans forward.*

 

**SM: I want you and every single one of you freeloading, money grabbing fame *meow* to *meow* out of MAWL forever. Because this is SM HeartBreaker country. I don't want any of you jokes, clowns and freaks in MY company. For as long as I am here. MAWL is off limits from part time appearances from outsiders. No more dream matches like this. No more putting over your *meow* stable that is just a carbon copy of your deep ground stable. No more jokes, clowns and freaks. I don't care if you are representing NWW, GWC or P2G. You are not welcome in MAWL. You won't be staying in MAWL. You won't be returning to MAWL. Because tonight, it will be you that is hung up high from the ceiling and used to send a message.**

 

*CatchphraseMANIA is about to run wild.*

 

*SM: And do you know why I will be doing all that tonight?*

 

*Wait for it...*

 

**SM: Because I am SM HeartBreaker and that is the HeartBreaking truth!!**

 

*SM HeartBreaker throws down his microphone and jumps out of his chair as he is hyped for his match in a MAWL ring. TONIGHT!! Once he arrives at the arena tonight of course...*

 

 

The heart of the Currency Cartel's power. An imposing auditorium within their headquarters. Cold, polished stone walls rise high, amplifying every sound. Harsh, dramatic spotlights cut through the ambient gloom, focusing intensely on a massive, raised podium.Dominating the space behind the podium hangs an immense Currency Cartel flag – its stark gold and black symbols gleaming under the lights. The hall is packed shoulder-to-shoulder with a sea of faces. Supporters clutching Cartel flags, their eyes gleem with zealous belief. Heavily armed mercenaries, their presence a chilling promise of force. Banners bearing the Cartel insignia hang from pillars, creating a sense of overwhelming presence. The air crackles with anticipation and unwavering loyalty.

 

A low, ominous hum fills the auditorium . Suddenly, spotlights snap onto the podium as Keyser Söze strides forward with precision.

 

 

He wears impeccably tailored suit. He reaches the center of the podium, pausing for a beat, surveying the assembly below him with an air of absolute command. The crowd erupts in a deafening roarof cheers and rhythmic chanting of "Keyser Keyser." Keyser raises a hand slightly, and the noise begins to subside, though the energy remains palpable. Beside him, slightly behind, stands SlowMo Tapout. statuesque, impassive, cold determination.

 

 

She is the embodiment of the Cartel's ruthless efficiency. Keyser. his voice, amplified by hidden speakers, booms through the hall in a commanding fashion.

 

Keyser Söze : You know… it's funny. Every federation that we conquer… every territory we bring under the glorious banner of the Cartel… I expect resistance. I expect that we will be seen as the villains. After all, we are the invading force. The unenlightened masses, the fans blinded by the propaganda of dying regimes… they have yet to see our glorious vision. They have yet to come to the realization… that we are the heroes in this story!

 

A wave of cheers washes over the hall. Mercenaries offer sharp nods.

 

Keyser Söze : We are creating something better for them! Everywhere we go, we bring order, we bring strength, we bring value! Yet here… here in MAWL, since we first graced this federation on  our native Canadian soil. We were welcomed. Embraced! Some might foolishly write that off as simple patriotism, Canadians cheering for their own. But tonight… tonight, my friends, will be the true test!

 

Keyser pauses, letting the weight of his words sink in. He turns slightly, acknowledging SlowMo.

 

Keyser Söze : The last time SM Heartbreaker, SlowMo Tapout, and myself shared the same building… SM was their golden boy. They chanted his name. Week after week, he played the hero, toppling the so-called "bad guys." But I ask you… I ask everyone… who is the real "bad guy" in the match that approaches? We prepare to walk into SM's supposed home turf of MAWL… but is it truly his turf anymore?

 

Murmurs and sneers ripple through the crowd.

 

Keyser Söze: Do the fans still love you like they did in that pathetic bunker, Mr. Heartbreaker? Or have they finally opened their eyes? It reveals the truly pathetic state of this federation when the man leading its laughable defense force is someone the fans themselves can no longer stomach!

 Keyser leans into the microphone.

Keyser Söze: I would argue… no, I state that what we in the Currency Cartel are providing, while perhaps perceived as cruel by the weak… is a necessary, vital service! We are purging the rot!

 

SlowMo steps forward slightly, her gaze cold and fixed, as if looking straight through the walls to her opponent.

 

SlowMo Tapout: SM... The last time we fought, you were the hero in their little story. I was younger then. Relatively inexperienced. I stepped into this world driven by… passion.

The words SlowMo says echo around the auditorium with disdain.

 SlowMo Tapout: ...Wanting to learn, wanting to belong. But since then… Keyser has opened my eyes. He has shown me the business. The reality. The power. The money to be made. The hard truths and the brutal necessities required merely to survive, let alone thrive.

 

Tonight, SM, you fight someone entirely different. The naivete is gone, burned away. I've fought across continents, conquered promotions you've only dreamed of, survived and dominated in a f@%ked up circus filled with the absolute dregs of society! Tonight, despite your claims that MAWL is your home… the Cartel will prove, unequivocally, that THIS is OUR home turf now!

 

A guttural roar of approval from the crowd.

 

SlowMo Tapout: Last time, I left you humiliated, upside down, bleeding. Tonight? Tonight, I finish the job. I'm not here for childish games, poking fun by wearing your faded merchandise like some cheap souvenir. No. Forget the humiliation of the past. Tonight… tonight I plan to end the night by staking this glorious Cartel flag

 SlowMo gestures back towards the massive banner

SlowMo Tapout: ... firmly in the center of that ring… through your corpse.

 

The crowd gasps, then erupts in savage delight. Chants of "SlowMo SlowMo!" begin.

 

SlowMo Tapout: When tonight is over, your career will be over. Just as you failed miserably in the bunker, tonight you will fail again. You will be left staring blankly up at the very rafters from which you once dangled, helpless, while an entire arena hails the undeniable power of the Cartel! After tonight, MAWL will be Cartel home turf… and you, SM Heartbreaker, will be our broken, bloodied flag bearer!

 

Keyser steps back to the center, a predatory gleam in his eyes. He raises his arms slowly, basking in the energy.

 

Keyser Söze: Rejoice, SM! In your own pathetic way, you helped create this empire through your failures! And tonight… tonight you get the distinct honour of being a part of its greatest expansion yet!

To the misguided fans of MAWL! Tonight, you will witness the unstoppable scope of our movement! You will watch as we surgically remove SM Heartbreaker from the front lines of your crumbling defense force like the cancer he is!

 

Keyser's voice rises to a thunderous crescendo.

 

Keyser Söze: Tonight, we BURN MAWL TO THE GROUND! And from its ashes, nourished by your broken dreams, we will BUILD something stronger! Something purer! Something better! We do it all for YOU! The people! OUR FANS! You… are welcome. The war machine rages on! SM… there is No. Other. Way.

 

SlowMo throws her head back and bellows, her voice echoing Keyser's power.

 

SlowMo Tapout: HAIL THE CURRENCY CARTEL!

 

The response is instantaneous and overwhelming. The entire hall erupts. Chanting, stomping, roaring. A tidal wave of sound crashes against the stone walls. Flags wave frantically. Mercenaries raise their weapons in salute. Keyser and SlowMo stand side-by-side on the podium, bathed in the spotlights, symbols of absolute, unyielding power, the massive flag looming behind them like a conquering shadow.

 

 

Colin: These two have a rivalry that goes back ages, across several companies, across time and space. Any other night this would be a main event, and I think down the line I can see these two meeting in just that circumstance.

 

 

Kendra: You're not wrong, Colin. And the only reason this match is before the cell match between Thor and Mono is it's easier to stack two cells on one than it is to build and remove a cell to then build three cells. And that's no shade to Thor or Mono, who are two amazing competitors, but this we're about to witness is set to be a piece of history.

 

Colin: SM Heartbreaker is out here fighting everyone. He took it to Psycho $upremacy earlier and he's taking it to Currency Cartel now.

 

 

Arvin: And yet these people still hate him. All he does for MAWL and BOOMania continues to run wild.

 

Colin: I mean, it's not like he's doing it out of the goodness of his heart. 

 

Arvin: What do you call his taking in interest in Dinah Soar?

 

Colin: I call that corruption of an innocent.

 

Kendra: I have to agree.

 

SLOWMO TAPOUT VS SM HEARTBREAKER

 

Ding ding ding!

 

 

Ash: The following contest is scheduled for one fall!

 

 

SM Heartbreaker storms out, wearing the gear from his first ever fight with SlowMo. To his surprise, a SMALL group of middle age and elderly people cheer amidst the standard wave of BOOMania. 

 

 

Colin: Someone is feeling nostalgic. 

 

Arvin: Someone is trying to relive their glory days. 

 

Kendra: Someone is trying to get in the head of SlowMo.

 

Ash: First, from SlowMo's Past, weighing in at 205 pounds, SM HEARTBREAKER!

 

 

The air in the arena grows cold as the logo of the military arm of the Currency Cartel's Contra Unit flashes on the screen. The Contra Unit's leader, SlowMo Tapout enters the arena with the rest of the Currency Cartel. First person, blasting through the curtains, is Wardy Chin and his Boys:

 

 

Wardy Chin: BOYS!... Let's go break some hearts! Behind Wardy walks Keyser Söze, wearing a black suit rumoured to cost more than a family sedan. He cautiously lights a cigar and lets out a plume of smoke as he walks towards the ring.

 

 

The last one out is SlowMo Tapout, in full combat gear.

 

 

She has a mischievous, yet sadistic look on her face as she uses both arms to proudly hold up the Currency Cartel Piss Pigs Flag above her head.

 

 

Arvin: SM's not the only one who can play the blast from the past game!

 

The fans chant SlowMo's name and reach out to simply touch her as she walks around the ring. SlowMo enters the ring and drapes the Cartel's flag over the top rope as the ring announcer introduces her.

 

Ash: Representing the Currency Cartel. Standing at five feet four inches, she is the Suplex Demon. She is the Queen of Queen's Street West. Hailing from Van Nuys, Toronto, Canada. She is SlowMo, Tapoooooout!

 

SlowMo backs up into the her corner and crouches down as Keyser whispers the game plan of the match into her ear. SlowMo nods and giggles maniacally while looking across the ring and nodding at Keyer's every word.

 

The bell rings.

 

Colin: A classic match-up in every sense of the word, these two have more history than probably any pair in this building and that may even include me and Bianca. Possibly. Maybe Mal Sangre and Sombras go further back but other than that.

 

Kendra: The two of them circling each other now, Slow has her eyes locked dead on SM, SM wisely trying to keep himself in the center of the ring and keeping half an eye on the Currency Cartel outside. And they lock up. 

 

Arvin: The struggle is evident in both their faces, this is a different SM than we've seen in a while, that cockiness is cut with determination and he wraps his arm around Mo's head for a DDT! Mo quick to her feet, going for a dropkick and he catches it, brings her down into a backbreaker! Slow rolls a bit and hooks SM's leg, going for that ankle lock but a Kangaroo Kick by SM pushes her away, propelling her to the ropes and a snap neckbreaker!

 

Colin: SM has an answer for every move Mo is throwing at him and she retreats to her corner for a second to get a pep talk by Keyser...SM not giving her the space and running low dropkick! He just took her out at her knees and faceplanted her! 

 

Kendra: Not giving her the chance to get up, he hooks her into a Full Nelson and bridging deadlift suplex!

 

1!

 

Colin: Slow rolls out and you can see she's starting to get a little peeved. Taking a run at SM and dropkick to his back! SM's head plonks at full speed into that turnbuckle! Slow catches him on the rebound and German Suplex!! Second German Suplex!! Going for the release German and SM LANDS ON HIS FEET! RUNNING DDT! SM Heartbreaker is dialed in!

 

Kendra: I feel like I'm watching a classic rerun match right now and my inner child is so excited. 

 

Arvin: Keyser's yelling...something at SM, but SM not listening to Keyser's digs or at least pretending not to. SM Irish Whips Slow to the Turnbuckle away from Kaiser and full speed charge...HIGH ANGLE DROPKICK MISSES! Wardy's boys push Slow out of the way just in time! 

 

Kendra: SM should have stuck to keeping her in the center. By the ropes is the Currency Cartel's world, and the Boys have SM's legs! They YANK HIM AROUND THE POST! No SM Jr in his future! Mo with a facewash and up to the middle turnbuckle, elbow drop! SM's momentum has been halted pretty severely!

 

Colin: Slow dragging SM from the post and looks like she might be trying to get the Jaws in SM GETS HIS FEET TO THE ROPES AND SALIDA DEL SOL! SM going for the pin!

 

1!

 

Kendra: SlowMo gets her shoulder up and uses it to wrap around SM's head...lifting them both up and spinning him around into an Exploder Suplex! SM bounces against the turnbuckles! Mo drags SM from the corner by the arm and has that arm trapped...stomp to the shoulder! And another! SM trying not to give her the pleasure of showing pain. 

 

Colin: Seems like that's just motivating Slow to keep the stomp going and ANOTHER O- SM GOLD MISTS HER! SM up to his feet with a big right punch! A big left punch! Two more rights! Whips her across the ropes and WARDY'S BOYS PULL HER TO SAFETY. Wardy starting to cloth off the Mist from Slow's eyes.

 

Kendra: SM running to the ropes, CLEARS THE ROPES, SHOOTING STAR PRESS TO SM AND WARDY AND HIS BOYS! THEY ALL GET A STARSCREAM! 

 

Some fans start cheering "SM! SM! SM!" It is by no means a large amount but they're pretty loud.

 

Arvin: Looks like SM's got a hole in his BOOMania. I'm not sure how he's going to take it or respond.

 

Colin: You can tell that both Mo and SM are a little taken by this reaction, Mo used to having fans on her side and SM used to being hated. Andra starts the count-

 

1!

 

Kendra: SM not wanting to deal with the Cartel writ large, tries to get himself back in the ring NO! Mo pulls him off the Apron.

 

2!

 

Arvin: Mo suplexes SM into the steps! 

 

3!

 

Colin: SM trying to come back and Wardy and his boys are standing in his way. In the view of the ref, they can't touch him but they can stop him. 

 

4!

 

Kendra: SM looking to get back into the ring and Keyser blows smoke in his face! 

 

5!

 

 

Colin: JCM TACKLES KEYSER!! 

 

Harley: Hello Boys!

 

Kendra: Harley takes the Bat to Wardy's Boys! Jay getting Wardy with the Crowbar!

 

6!

 

 

Arvin: KAYLEE TRYING TO POP OUT FROM THE BARRICADE...SHE'S PULLED BACK DOWN! WAIT--

 

 

Colin: DINAH SOAR JUST PUT ANOTHER DENT IN THE NUMBERS GAME! JCM is blowing Keyser's own cigar at him! This is a disaster for the Cartel! SM smiling, he re-enters the ring and loads himself up to the middle-SlowMo enters the ring and HERE HE COMES WITH THE RUNNING V NO! SLOW CATCHES HIM AND TWISTS HIM AROUND AND LOCKS IN THE FANGS!! THE PAIN ON HIS FACE IS BREAKING THROUGH!! THIS COULD BE THE ENDGAME!!

 

Kendra: But with the Cartel neutralized outside, SM is safe at the ropes! He gets his feet up to the ropes...flip into a Bridging Pin....

 

1!

2!

TH...NO! 

 

Kendra: Slow throws SM off the ropes, he comes back around and takes the Guillotine! Here she goes again, German Suplex 1! German Suplex 2! Release German! He's not able to stop the momentum this time! SM is in trouble!

 

Arvin: SM barely to his feet, Slow taking the run with her hands in her pocket, SM MEETS HER WITH A SUPERKICK! HE FLIPS HER WITH THAT KICK! He's got the legs! HE GETS THE HEARTSHOOTER IN! SHE DIDN'T GET A CHANCE TO GET HER HAND OUT OF HER POCKETS! SLOWMO IS REFUSING TO GIVE UP, BUT SHE ALSO CAN'T GET UP! 

 

Colin: She's trying to flop free! She's trying to inch to the ropes! She...JUST GETS HER TEETH ON THE ROPES! SHE'S BITING THE ROPES! I have to hand it to her, that's clever! SM releases the hold AND IMMEDIATELY WALKS ON HER BACK! HE'S NOT LETTING HER MOVE...A JUMPING STOMP TO SLOWMO'S HEAD! GIVES HIMSELF SOME HEIGHT ON THE SECOND ROPE AND ANOTHER STOMP! Her jaw unclenches from the rope!

 

Arvin: SLOWMO LOWBLOW! SM huddles over! SlowMo takes a run and gets herself under him! VIRTUAL RIOT! Going for the pin-

 

1!

2!

TH...NO! HE GETS HIS HAND ON THE ROPES! 

 

Kendra: Both of them more exhaustion than person at this point. She hits the ground in frustration and to her feet, SM using the ropes to get to his feet, he looks over at SlowMo through panting spells, loading up for a Superkick and SHE EVADES AND ANOTHER LOW BLOW, SLOW OFF THE ROPES AND CHARGING AND SETTING HERSELF LOW, LOOKS LIKE SHE'S TRYING FOR THE VIRTUAL RIOT AND SM INSTINCTIVELY LOWERS HERSELF BELOW HER AND BACK BODY DROP!! Going up for the Starscream! Moving a little Slow, but for the first time in who knows how long, the crowd is actually behind SM! 

 

SM! SM! SM! SM! SM! 

 

Colin: SM taking the moment despite himself and STARSCEEEAAAAANO!!! SLOWMO GETS THE KNEES UP!!! SM PAUSED FOR ONE MOMENT, GAVE IN FOR ONE MOMENT AND SLOWMO TOOK ADVANTAGE! SHE LOCKS IN THE FANGS!

 

The chant changes to SM TAPOUT! SM TAPOUT! 

 

Arvin: They're telling him to tap out! See how fickle these fans are! 

 

Colin: They could also be chanting for Mo...SM does stand also for Slow Mo...I guess that amounts to the same thing though.

 

SM has a moment of dark realization and a smile comes over his face. With his free hand he pulls at Slow's hair. He gets his hand to her ear and pulls a bolt out. SM screams in pain. SM knuckles the bolt and punches her in the temple, just out of view of the ref. He drops the bolt and rolls her up in a Gannosuke Clutch! 

 

Kendra: SM WITH A GANNOSUKE! I DON'T KNOW HOW HE MANAGED IT BUT THERE IT IS!

 

1!

2!

3!

 

SM Heartbreaker wins by Pinfall!

 

 

Ash: Here is your winner, SM Heartbreaker!!

 

The crowd isn't sure how to respond. Some cheer, some boo. 

 

Colin: SM wouldn't be able to justify that hellaciously big ego if he couldn't put on matches like this. Love him, hate him, this man is a mainstay wherever he shows his face.

 

 

Backstage Alley – After the SM Match

 

As SM Heartbreaker and Jay the Joker exchange laughs and disappear down a hallway, JCM Ace lingers behind. He lights a spliff, still watching the corridor where the Psycho $upremacy is getting patched up and yelling at staff.

 

 

Heloisa Cabral approaches.

 

HELIOSA: There’s a rumor going around. Are you going to start teaming up with SM Heartbreaker now?

JCM Ace shrugs cooly.

 

JCM ACE: I didn’t do that for him. I did that for me. But hey… that idea ain’t outta the question. Might even have someone else in mind—just in case the streets get crowded.

 

He takes a slow drag, the embers flaring in his eyes.

 

JCM ACE: Nero tried to make me a message. I just sent one back.
You mess with the king? You better bury him. ‘Cause if he’s still breathing… he’s coming back swinging.

 

He stubs out the spliff on a nearby crate, pockets the remains, and walks off into the haze—leaving the question of allegiance in the air.

The camera switches…

 

Bloodswan bursts through the heavy door of the Psycho $upremacy’s private room, boots echoing down the concrete floor. Her eyes are wild, her breath quick, blood on her sleeve—not hers. 

 

Bloodswan screams, calling out to Nero.

 

BLOODSWAN: Nero! It was a trap—Heartbreaker wasn’t alone! Others were with him, they were all there.  They knew we were coming.

 

She scans the room. It’s empty. The lights flicker above a desk where Nero usually sharpens his weapons or tends to his strange relics. Only now... he’s gone.

 

On the table lies a single parchment card — worn, old, but crisp in its intent.

 

Bloodswan slowly approaches, picking it up with shaking fingers. Embossed in deep crimson wax on the front:

 

“LB”

 

Underneath, in delicate yet commanding script:

 

“The Contract is waking. You know what that means.”

 

Bloodswan flips the card over. Scrawled on the back, almost burning through the paper:

 

“Below the crown, the flame still breathes.”

Her eyes widen—recognition flashing through them.

 

BLOODSWAN: Charlotte...

 

She clutches the card tighter, breath catching.

 

BLOODSWAN: You didn’t even tell us you were leaving...

 

She grips the card tight, jaw clenched.

 

BLOODSWAN: Whatever’s pulling you out there... I hope it doesn’t pull you under.

 

She slides the card into her coat and storms off into the hallway, Her boots echo as her silhouette disappears into the dark, swallowed by the hallway—
—following the same call that pulled Nero away.

 

 

INT. CONNECTICUT SCIENCE CENTER

 

Gozu is admiring the Pixar exhibit.

 

 

When across the exhibit room he sees-

 

 

Patron (talking to an annoyed other patron): You know, I don't know anyone else who works as hard as John Ratzenberger. He's in every Pixar movie and-

 

Gozu: well not *every* movie. 

 

Ragnarrr: In fact, he wasn't in 5 movies.

 

Gozu: Turning Red...

 

Ragnarrr: Luca...

 

Gozu: Soul...

 

Ragnarrr: Lightyear...

 

Gozu/Ragnarrr: And Elemental. 

 

Patron: Well those don't count because they're w-

 

 

Gozu and Ragnarrr dual chokeslam the Patron over the Open Atrium to the lobby.

 

Gozu and Ragnarrr  look at each other, like they're going to share a tender moment then-

 

Gozu and Ragnarrr throw punches at each other. 

 

Ragnarrr hits Gozu with a huge belly to belly suplex. Gozu judo flips Ragnarrr into an open door way which leads to the 3D Modeling area.  Gozu takes a model of [Redacted] and blasts Ragnarrr over the head with it. Gozu hits Ragnarrr with a huge lariat causing Ragnarrr to tumble to the feet of [Don't Sue Me] which Gozu fist bumps before slamming it into the back of Ragnarrr. Even with the flimsy material, the force leaves a bit of a bruise. 

 

Ragnarrr tries to get to his feet but alters his plan and uses a low center of gravity to charge Gozu and back body drop him over onto the pedestal stand where a 3D Model had previously been. Ragnarrr unhooks the velvet rope that is around the now desecrated art and begins lashing Gozu with it. Gozu finds himself battered backwards a bit until he uses the rope like [Deadly Fighting Game] Ninja Render [Yellow 5] and ripcords Ragnarrr into a devastating headbutt. Ragnarrr comes tumbling back and they end up in the Surfaces Area.

 

Gozu charges Ragnarrr but Ragnarrr is able to catch Gozu and scoop slams him onto a pair of console dashboards. The colors on the interactive screen change colors rapidly as Gozu's body hits various buttons. Gozu grabs Ragnarrr by his beard and monkey flips him over so that he too gets to play with the colors using his body. Gozu mounts Ragnarrr and devastates him with a flurry of headbutts, but Ragnarrr low kicks him and he slides off the consoles. Ragnarrr gets to the legs of Gozu and swings him into one of the consoles breaking it. Gozu responds by hitting Ragnarrr with a sky high chokeslam through the top of another console. Ragnarrr punches his hands through the front of the console and trips Gozu, then drags him full speed in to the front of it. Both of their heads pop through the top. Gozu grabs Ragnarrr by the throat and charges him through the setup coming out the other end then chokeslam tosses him into the Set and Cameras room. 

 

Gozu drags Ragnarrr by the hair and body slams him into the forest setup, causing Ragnarrr to hit the tree in the center back first. Gozu plays around with the console to make a fun little animation of Ragnarrr getting up then realizes that this means Ragnarrr is getting up just as he's right up in his face. Ragnarrr smashes Gozu's head repeatedly into the front of this console. Ragnarrr hits a belly to belly sending Gozu into the area with the tree then searches around and takes a camera and smashes it over Gozu's head. Ragnarrr begins to walk through the exit when Gozu spears him, causing him to tumble towards the opening for the Atrium. Gozu grabs Ragnarrr by the throat and holds him over the Atrium...

 

Ragnarrr rakes his eyes! Gozu releases the hold and Ragnarrr begins to fall!

 

Ragnarrr is able to barely grab onto the walkway and then get his hands on the railing. He walks himself along the railing, trying to be faster than Gozu's hammering of his fingers. Ragnarrr finally catches himself onto the railing and hits a diving clothesline to Gozu backing him to the other side of the walkway and barely getting himself back on. Gozu catches him and SKY HIGH CHOKESLAM OFF THE ATRIUM!!

 

Gozu watches Ragnarrr tumble all the way down and land on the Welcome Table. Gozu gives himself a count off, and PURGATORY PLUNGE DRIVING RAGNARRR THROUGH THE WELCOME TABLE!

 

Anyway that's why MAWL is longer allowed at the Connecticut Science Center.

 

 

The camera follows Elisa Mae He, her heels clicking sharply against the floor as she storms through the backstage hallway. She’s on the phone, clearly agitated.

 

Elisa Mae He (on phone, frustrated):
"Now, listen here, sugar, I don’t care how you see it. Balor Wolfe’s gonna have to answer for what he did—him and his little sidekick can’t be pullin’ stunts like that and expect no consequences. I want him here the second he steps foot in this building, you hear me?"

 

She walks past her desk for the fourth time, the room eerily quiet. As she walks past it again, something catches her eye. She freezes, blinking twice, then stops and turns slowly. Alastor is sitting comfortably in her chair, feet propped up on the desk, a wide grin plastered across his face, looking far too at ease in her space.

 

Alastor (grinning, casually):
"Well, well, Elisa... I’ve been waiting, darling. I was wondering how long it would take for you to notice me."

 

Elisa’s face twitches in frustration. She stops, her phone still pressed to her ear but not hearing a word as she glares at Alastor.

 

Elisa Mae He (gritting her teeth):
"Alastor... I don’t have the time for your little games today. You and Balor Wolfe done pulled one of the slickest stunts I’ve ever seen after that 50 Cent and Wildfire match. Y’all think it’s all fun and games, huh? Well, you’re gonna learn real quick that this ain’t a playground. I’m settin’ up a 4-way match, and you—"

 

Alastor (cutting her off with a raised hand):
"No, I don’t think it will be."

 

He pulls out a folded letter from his jacket pocket and casually tosses it across the desk. The paper flutters in the air and lands right in front of her. Alastor smiles as he leans back in the chair, enjoying the moment.

 

Alastor (smirking):
"You see, darling, I took the liberty of paying a visit to your bosses. After a little chat, they decided that perhaps singling out Balor, myself, and Radio Silence was a bit... unfair. So, they came to a conclusion. As long as we don’t break anything, they’re perfectly fine with us doing as we please—within reason, of course."

 

Elisa looks down at the letter, shaking her head in disbelief. She rips open the envelope, her fingers trembling with frustration as she pulls out the paper. She starts reading the contents aloud, her voice growing sharper as she reads.

 

Elisa Mae He (reading aloud):
"'As per the discussion, we’ve come to an agreement that targeting members of Radio Silence specifically, without clear cause, is not in line with company policy. As long as no physical damage is done to property or personnel, the actions of Balor Wolfe and his associates will be tolerated. We trust this will prevent further disruptions.'"

 

She slams the letter down onto the desk, her cheeks flushed with anger. She glares at Alastor, who is still lounging comfortably, his feet up, grinning like a cat that caught the canary.

 

Elisa Mae He (snapping):
"Well, ain't that somethin’? Y’all think you’re real cute, don’t you? You and your little tricks. You just waltz in here, pull some strings, and get the bosses to agree to this nonsense like you’ve got everyone wrapped around your little finger. But let me tell you something, Alastor—"

 

Alastor (cutting her off, leaning forward slightly with a soft chuckle):
"Oh, darling, I am smart. I don’t need to think it... I simply am."

 

Elisa clenches her fists, her whole body brimming with irritation. She leans in closer to Alastor, her voice dripping with cold fury.

 

Elisa Mae He (through clenched teeth):
"You might think you’ve got all the cards now, but don’t think for a second this is the end of this, sugar. I’ve still got some tricks of my own up my sleeve."

 

Alastor lets out a low, melodic laugh, his eyes gleaming with amusement as he stands up from the chair, stepping closer to her. His smirk widens, and his voice drops into a low, almost teasing tone.

 

Alastor (grinning wider):
"Oh, darling, this is far from the end. But do tell, when does the fun truly begin? Perhaps I’ll be around to see."

 

He takes a slow step backward, fading into the shadows with a flick of his hand, his laughter echoing in the room as Elisa stares after him, her face twisted with fury. The camera lingers on her for a moment before cutting to black.

 

Alastor (from the shadows, faintly):
"After all... a deal with me is never truly over."

 

Fade out.

 

 

Kendra: Another place we're not welcome. Thanks Gozu.

 

 

Arvin: 

 

Colin: Two matches remain today and they both involve the cell.

 

HELL IN THE CELL

THOR VS HIGH FLYER MONO

 

Ding ding ding!

 

 

Ash: The following contest is a Falls Count Anywhere Hell in the Cell Match!

 

 

Thor stands on the top of the titantron with a zipline.

 

 

Ash: First! From Belize, weighing in at 245 pounds, THE KING OF KINGS, THOR!

 

Thor starts to come down the zipline.

 

Colin: WAIT! 

 

High Flyer Mono reveals himself on the top of the cell!

 

 

Colin: High Flyer runs off the top of the cell and SHOOTING STAR PRESS TAKING THOR OFF THE ZIPLINE! 

 

Kendra: They both come crashing down! High Flyer throws Thor into ring, going for the pin!

 

1!

2!

3!

 

High Flyer Mono wins by Pinfall!

 

 

Ash: Here is your winner, HIGH FLYER MONO!

 

ARIES TITLE

ENDOCYTOSIS MATCH

 

Ding ding ding!

 

 

The ten competitors enter the ring.

 

 

The bell rings.

 

Colin: We have our Main Event now, three cells stacked on top of each other. Only the bottom cell has a door, and the middle cell has the title. You have to be the one holding the title when you touch the bottom ring. Which means three things need to happen - You need to get all the way up that tower, you need to break through all 3 cell ceilings, and you need to hold the title at the bottom of the ring. 

 

Arvin: Rade already getting to work launching Schmetterling out of the ring with a choke toss! Launching Lynx out of the ring with a choke toss! Launching Neo out of the ring with a choke toss! Tank and Ivan recognizing that the way to keep the big man down this is an alliance, however temporary, running double lariat and Rade gets taken off his feet! 

 

Kendra: Blood Drawn with a vicious double axe hammer to Sarah Sharp, coming off the ropes and running shoulder block bounces Diddy! Neo back onto the apron, Lynx onto the apron, they each take a corner and double diving dropkick to Blood Drawn! Drawn off his feet but only briefly. 

 

Colin: It's a very crowded ring right now and there's no way to lessen the numbers of this, you're gonna have to start spreading out. 

 

Arvin: That's what Rade was trying to do but the circus squad found their way back in. To your point Colin, nothing is going to get solved inside that ring, they're gonna have to bust out of it. Schmetterling drags Blood Drawn out of the ring but Drawn slams him into the cell wall with monster truck force. The wall is shaking for sure but no break, here comes Neonyx with a Suicide Corkscrew Dive to Schmetterling and Blood Drawn! 

 

Kendra: Chantarelle and Diddy double teaming Lynx in the corner, ugh, here comes the oil and he gives some to Chantarelle as well, a Double Puff Daddy Punch to Lynx. Tank grabs Diddy from behind, lifting him up and Military Press! Deadlifting Diddy into the Military Press and Inverted Slam! It's an Air Raid!

 

Arvin: And that's a Ground Rade, launches Tank up and 7 FEET UNDER! Ivan gets Rade and OVERHEAD BELLY TO BELLY SUPLEX! THE SIBERIAN TITAN SENDS RADE INTO THE CELL WALL! THAT'S GONNA BREAK IT OPEN!!

 

Colin: The action starting to spill to the outside now, Blood Drawn drills Neo with a German! Blood Drawn drills Schmetterling with a German! Rade gets a German!! EVERYONE GETS A GERMAN! 

 

Kendra: No one trying to make the climb just yet, I don't blame them, each cell on its own is 20 feet on its own. But you can't win if you don't go in. 

 

Arvin: If I were Rade I would have tried to launch my opponents up and break the cell that way.

 

Kendra: That would be a 13 foot toss above his head, and then a 13 foot leap to get into the hole. I'm sure he could do the first, not sure about the second. 

 

Colin: Inside the ring, Chantarelle and Sharp are double teaming Diddy, Sharp turns it around and picks Chantarelle up and a SHARP DRESSED ONTO DIDDY! Diddy trying to roll out of the ring now, Sharp grabs him by his neck and launches him back in the ring! Tank WITH A CONCUSSIVE BLAST TO LYNX! 

 

Kendra: Outside the ring, Blood Drawn begins the climb and Rade picks him off the cell like he's an apple! Just tossing him aside! Neo takes a run and jumps on the shoulders of Rade and using him to propel himself onto the wall! Neo is scurrying up the cell faster than Rade could grab him! Rade decides to start the climb, BLOOD DRAWN BACK TO HIS FEET AND SMASHES HIS HEAD INTO THE CELL! Turnabout is fair play! Blood Drawn starts to make the climb! We have our first two heading to the top! 

 

Arvin: Schmetterling and Rade battling it out on the outside of the ring, all they're really doing is distracting each other from the victory. Volkov and Tank starting to head outside the ring to join the battle, Chantarelle and Sarah Sharp try to pull them back but each takes a back elbow! Volkov and Tank exit the ring, Tank off the apron already, Chantarelle goes up to the top rope and DIVING FAME ASSER TO VOLKOV AND TAKES HIM OFF THE APRON INTO THE STEPS! 

 

Kendra: Tank turns around and Double Hand Chokeslam sending Chantarelle into the same steps! Tank heading outside and starting the climb,  we have Blood Drawn and Neo already at the top and Blood Drawn going for a Bloodline Breaker but Neo reversing into a huracanrana! Neo gets Blood Drawn away from the center and goes for the cartwheel handspring kick, BLOOD DRAWN CATCHES HIM BY THE LEG AND TOSSES HIM OFF THE STRUCTURE GOOD GOD! 

 

Colin: Rade starting to make the climb and Schmetterling deciding against pulling him up, going for the climb himself. Tank makes it to the top and is taking it to Blood Drawn, quick right, quick left, and a giant headbutt! Tank with a Concussive Blast to the center of the Cell! You can see the structure starting to give! Blood Drawn getting to his feet and hits a Flatliner on Tank! The structure starting to rattle further! 

 

Arvin: The ring is cleared now as the rest of the crew have made it to the outside. It's like watching the SWAT team scale a building. Chantarelle's up to the middle cell now, Diddy making his way up, Sharp making her way up, Neo trying to get back to his feet. BLOOD DRAWN WITH A BLOODLINE BREAKER AND TANK GOES THROUGH THE TOP CELL! FIRST CELL OPEN! Rade with a chokeslam now to Schmetterling! And a 7 Feet Under to Blood Drawn! He's keeping them away from the opening, that's a smart move. 

 

Colin: Lynx makes it up the Cell, Neo just about up and Rade tosses Lynx at Neo! DIDDY WITH THE BAD BOY BULLDOZER SENDS RADE OFF THE STRUCTURE! GOOD GOD!  Diddy is the only one standing and- what's that beeping noise?

 

 

Kendra: 50 Cent is driving an excavator into the ring!! WHAT?? 50 gets the excavator to the structure, he almost ran over Lynx! I think the excavator has something in the tub of the crane...50 is lowering a crate...that...THAT LOGO, THAT'S THE CRAP CHAMPAGNE DIDDY TRIED TO CELEBRATE WITH! HE'S LOWERING IT TO THE GROUND, WHAT THE HELL IS 50 DOING?

 

Colin: I'll tell you what he's doing, he's pressing a button and climbing onto the crane part as it rises up...He's taking an express route to the top of the Cell!! And Chantarelle and Sarah Sharp have dropped through the hole in the top of the structure and are battling it out with Tank, but the top story right now is 50 who makes it to the top of the cell...he KICKS DIDDY IN THE STOMACH, HOLDING HIM UP AND LAST RIDES HIM OFF THE CELL!!! DIDDY LANDS BACK FIRST ON THAT CRATE! THAT IS WOOD AND GLASS AND ALCOHOL CUSHIONING A 60 FOOT DROP!!! 

 

Arvin: I don't think Diddy's gonna win this match!

 

Kendra: Hell, I'll be surprised if he makes it to Taxiderby next week! THAT IS GRUESOME. 

 

Colin: TANK WITH CONCURRENT CONCUSSIVE BLASTS TO BOTH SARAH AND CHANTARELLE AND THEY ARE GOIN' THROUGH CELL NUMBER 2! 

 

Kendra: Wait, there appears to be MORE commotion outside and- Cristel is at the Excavator!

 

 

Colin: Cristel what are you doing??

 

Arvin: CRISTEL IS KNOCKING THE TOP TWO CELLS OFF THE STRUCTURE!!! SHE IS USING THE EXCAVATOR TO TAKE JUST ABOUT EVERYONE OUT OF THE EQUATION!! Chantarelle is directing her?? 

 

Colin: First Bianca, now Cristel?? 

 

Kendra: Cristel drops the crane through the top of the last Cell! CHANTARELLE HAS THE BELT AND SHE BRAINS SARAH SHARP WITH IT! CHANTARELLE DROPS THROUGH THE OPENING AND THAT'S GONNA DO IT!

 

Chantarelle wins!

 

 

Ash: Here is your winner and the inaugural Aries Champion, CHANTARELLE!

 

Chantarelle: Thank you, thank you. And I simply must give thanks and credit to your friend and mine, Zora Luthor International's newest member and spokesperson, CRYSTELLE!