INT. ARENA - DAY
"Come Together" by Soundgarden plays over the speakers as fans cheer. Bianca Diaz and Colin McRae sit at their desk.
Bianca: Welcome back for all the action! I'm Bianca Diaz.
Colin: And I'm Colin McRae. Bianca, we are a third of the way through our W2 Event, and I'm not sure if I'm relieved or don't want it to end.
Bianca: I agree, Colin! It's been just an absolute masterclass in mayhem. Nowhere in the mall has been safe for our competitors, no alliances are guaranteed, a group creates and collapses in the course of a day.
Colin: Well, I think Leila Blake will probably be relieved when this one is over, her attempts to get the chaos reined in have not gone as smoothly as planned.
Bianca: Honestly, I think she should just lean into the chaos at this point.
Colin: Well, here she is now, and I'm curious what's the story.
Leila Blake comes to address the audience.
Leila: Thank you! Thank you! I hope you have been enjoying the W2!
The crowd cheers.
Leila: I've come to you all with some special announcements that will change the card for our event! We're coming closer to securing our TV deal and so it is possible that MAWL Madness may even begin during the second week of this tournament. With that said, we intend to make good on our promises, and one such promise was that Dangerous Johnny Dagger would headline that show in chase of the Eurasian Title. SO! It is with that in mind that we are MOVING our Eurasian Title Match to RIGHT AFTER THIS ANNOUNCEMENT!
Bianca: Whoa, what?
Colin: I was wondering why there was only one match scheduled for the Pre-Show. Turns out there was a plan.
Leila: BUT! I do not want to shrink the main event card, SO in place of the scheduled Eurasian Title Match, we will be holding matches for TWO BRAND NEW TITLES! The first is a Trios Title and the competitors will be announced at the event. The second is our Inferno Title, a new Mid-Level Belt that will find its first champion through a Rumble Match, comprising all active roster members including anyone that signs through our upcoming TV deal!
The crowd loses their minds.
Colin: Two new titles! Including a Trios belt! The final day is looking to get crazier and crazier!
Leila: Thank you, Minnesota! You've been good to us as always, and this is shaping up to be an historic event. Now let's get MAWLing!
BLOODSTAR MATCH FOR THE EURASIAN TITLE
KITTY! VS ZODIAC ZAC VS QUESTION MARK VRAAG VS OMEGA X VS HADRON
Ash Greaves and Lily Martin enter the ring.
Ash: The following contest is a Bloodstar Match! The only way to eliminate your opponent is by making them bleed! The last remaining wrestler will be declared the winner and will be crowned the NEW Eurasian Champion!
A swirling mass of lights surrounds the stage and ramp creating a tunnel of sorts. The Birthday Massacre "Science" plays as a colorful man with blue beard and science themed robe enters. This is Hadron.
Ash: First, from Geneva, Switzerland, weighing 222 pounds, the Scion of Science, HADRON!
The lights change to a blue tint with rotating golden astrological signs. The Flaming Lips "Aquarius Sabotage" plays as a man with a Zodiac themed singlet walks out doing a swirling motion in front of his face with his hands.
Ash: And his opponents! From Reno, Nevada, weighing in at 212 pounds, the Superstar to the Stars, ZODIAC ZAC!
Bianca: Hadron beat Zodiac once, I imagine he's feeling pretty good about his chances.
Colin: True, but they also didn't have three other contenders to deal with.
Bianca: Also true.
Presidents of the United States of America "Kitty" plays as a grown man in a cat costume comes out. A red spotlight is always just in front of him, and he keeps attempting to leap into the spotlight before making it into the ring and the spotlight being on him, at which time he flexes.
Ash: From Rahway, New Jersey, weighing in at 277 pounds, KITTY!
Bianca: I can't. This is a grown man in a catsuit. Who thought this was a good idea?
Question Marks are projected around the arena area while System of a Down "Question!" plays. Question Mark Vraag perches in a Thinker pose on the stage, then jogs down to the ring.
Ash: And! From Nijmegen, Netherlands, weighing in at 207 pounds, Question Mark Vraag!
Colin: How can we tell if the Masked Man bleeds in this match?
Bianca: Trust me, you'll still see blood come through a luchador mask. The same fabric that makes it breathable makes it the slightest bit porous.
The lights go out and a Red X laser grows and shrinks in the ring. A fog machine creates a smoky effect and Omega X walks through it. He gets into the ring, the X shrinks completely and he throws both his arms up, causing small columns of fire to go through the turnbuckle.
Ash: And finally, from The Endtimes, weighing in at 355 pounds, OMEGA X!!
Colin: We don't get many people get too creative with their locations, but coming from the Endtimes is an undeniable flex.
The bell rings.
Bianca: And Bloodstar match is one of our most intensive match types, and you have to be incredibly tenacious to even step into the ring with this many other people literally out for blood. Question Mark gets us going early with a knee smash to Omega! KITTY! and Hadron give Zodiac Zac a good ol' stereo punch. Question catches Hadron off guard with a Hurricanrana! And Omega hits KITTY! with a stomach punch.
Colin: Zodiac decides to insert himself into the KITTY! and Omega face-off, and they plant him with a double back body drop for his troubles. Question Mark gives a slap to Hadron, that was just disrespectful.
Bianca: Trade places! Omega now working WITH Zodiac to get Hadron with a double back suplex, KITTY! sees the opening and catches Vraag with a dropkick. Zac and Omega teaming is short-lived, and Zac hits Omega with a spike piledriver. Hadron finally has an answer for Vraag's slap with a float-over neckbreaker and elbow drop.
Colin: Hadron getting some momentum going and hits Omega X with his Quantum Leap top-rope dropkick. KITTY! has more for Vraag and gets him with an enziguiri. Zodiac Zac tries to get involved with KITTY! and Vraag and that was a bad choice as KITTY! catches Zac running and launches him outside. OH! Springboard Crossbody by KITTY! to Zac. Vraag now open and decides to whip Hadron into the turnbuckle and rail him with a clothesline. Hadron turning his attention now to the outside and comes with a suicide dive and KITTY! catches him into a suplex! Omega caught alone with Vraag, Vraag holding his a second and DISCULPE by Vraag on Omega! Stalling Stunner!
Bianca: Zac grabs a bat from under the apron, Mark doesn't see him coming...Mark turns around and a bat to the stomach! Hadron returns the suplex to KITTY! outside!
Colin: Mark saying hey I didn't get my turn outside yet and Tope Con Hilo on Hadron! KITTY! lets them deal with each other and gets a Springboard Elbow drop to Omega X! Mark already done with outside and trying to come back in but KITTY! has a butt-wiggle going and that can only mean RED DOT SPECIAL all lined up for Question Mark! Elevated Spear! Hadron deciding to join everyone inside, Zac picks Omega X up and Hadron gets a Doomsday Device going! Omega trying to roll to his feet, Hadron charging in with the LHC! Omega X is bleeding! He's out of the match!
Omega X is eliminated by Hadron with the LHC (Running Elevated Flatliner)!
Bianca: KITTY! catches Question Mark with a Discus Clothesline, there's the wiggle and RED DOT SPECIAL TO QUESTION MARK! Zac done with his team-up with Hadron and Alabama Slam!
Colin: It's everyone for themselves in there, Bianca.
Bianca: Tell that to the competitors, as we're now getting a triple-team on Hadron....TRIPLE POWERBOMB! THE HEAVENS SHOOK! But Zac immediately kicks Question in the gut and drills him with a brainbuster! KITTY! whips Hadron into the corner! Fists up! (counting with crowd) 1! 2! 3! 4! 5! 6! 7! 8! 9! Are we getting 10...no, it's a Headbutt! KITTY! just took Hadron through 9 Lives!
Colin: Hadron stunned for a second but quickly spins around and gets up on the turnbuckle...SPLASH ON EVERYONE! HADRON MAKES A HAIL MARY PLAY!
Bianca: That was gutsy. But KITTY! running for Hadron, no Hadron ducks and Zodiac Zac gets the leg lariat! KITTY! is undeterred and comes back around- LOU THESZ PRESS! KITTY! has his hands out, and drilling them to both sides of Hadron's head with intensity! It's PLAYTIME! AND THAT'S A CUT! HADRON IS DONE!
Hadron is eliminated by KITTY! with the Playtime!
Colin: And Zac catches Question Mark with an Inverted DDT...ZAC HAS THE BAT! CRACKS IT OVER QUESTION'S HEAD AND THE QUESTION OF DOES MARK BLEED IS ANSWERED DEFINITIVELY! SEE YA LATER!
Question Mark Vraag is eliminated by Zodiac Zac with a bat shot to the head!
Bianca: We are down to the last two, and I gotta be honest, I didn't have KITTY! making it to the end on my bingo card.
Colin: Neither did I but we've talked about underestimating the weird ones. Zodiac Zac kicks KITTY! in the stomach! KITTY! retaliates with a punch and they're exchanging blows! Zac exits the exchange with a run and ARIES RUSH! KITTY! is winded by Zac's hard head!
Bianca: But only for a minute, as KITTY! sends Zac into the corner and STINGER SPLASH! Zac pushes KITTY! off with a quick punch, SLINGSHOT INTO THE TURNBUCKLE! KITTY! counters with a weak elbow shot, but now increasing the bionic elbow shots looking like some Dusty Rhodes noise in there, KITTY! tries to do the full Rhodes flourish but that gives Zac enough time to hip toss him! BIG BOOT!
Colin: Trying with a second big boot and he flies too close to the sun sign! Dragon Leg Screw by KITTY!
Bianca: I see what you did there. Zodiac cuts KITTY! down at the knees with a takedown and unloading with punches. Both of them seem to understand the assignment but neither wants to bleed! Zac with the jumping elbow to the midsection. Picks KITTY! up...TRUE GEMINI! What a Fisherman Buster! Fist Drop, and THERE'S THE BLOOD!
KITTY! is eliminated by Zodiac Zac with a True Gemini and Fist Drop!
Ash: Here is your winner, and the NEW Eurasian Champion, ZODIAC ZAC!
Bianca: We have a Eurasian Champion again! And what's more, we know what our headlining match for MAWL Madness is going to be!
Colin: What a start to this show! We have one more pre-match for you before we get into our W2 event. Over to the amazing Ash Greaves.
PRE-SHOW MATCH
MANIFESTATION OF DEFENESTRATION VS CRASH COURSE CRAIG CONVERY + LANDON GENTRY W/JOLLY THE MINSTREL
Ash is in the ring.
Ash: Aw, thanks, Colin. The following tag team contest is scheduled for one fall!
A man in a Crash Test themed suit with crash test symbol face paint and crash helmet, and carrying a dummy as Primitives “Crash” plays. This is “Crash Course” Craig Convery who runs to the ring while shaking the dummy and then running headfirst into the ring apron, acting dazed, and then telling the dummy to wait for him before getting into the ring.
Ash: First! From Detroit, Michigan, weighing in at 211 pounds, Crash Course Craig Convery!! And his partner-
Ash is interrupted as trumpets blare and a red carpet comes down. The minstrel enters first, followed by flower bearers, and begins to sing to the tune of a madrigal and play his lute. As he does so, Landon Gentry walks in behind him, in full Redcoat Regalia.
Minstrel: O Come, O Come, Tell ye a Tale, of a Champion in the making/ the pain he will bring to the riff-raff in ring/ the win is his for the taking/ if you stand in his way the tax you will pay by way of pain beyond your worst fears/ So lay down for pin and give him the wind or you will leave here in tears.
Ash: From Scunthorpe England, Landon Gentry.
The Minstrel continues to strum his lute to the same tune. The flower bearers approach the ring and use their hands to create a stepstool on which Landon steps and enters the ring. He waves in the flower bearers who take off his robe to reveal a bare chest. He puts his fists up as if to engage in fisticuffs and donnybrooks. The lights give a stained-glass like feeling as the colors rotate. The instrumental of "CASTLE OF GLASS" by Linkin Park plays and as the drums hit, Gil and Perry stand on the center of the stage and pound fists which causes two thin pillars of sparks to arise. They strut down the ramp, giving pump up shouts to the fans who cheer them back. Occasionally they pound a fist each of a fan. When they enter the ring, they both do the square hand smash in synchronicity, then scream and pillars of sparks go off in the ring.
Ash: And their opponents, accompanied by Delaware Daredevil Daria Donner, Unrelenting Perry Payne and Unbreakable Gilbert Glass, the MANIFESTATION OF DEFENESTRATION!
The bell rings, Gilbert Glass and Craig Convery start.
Colin: What is Daria doing down here?
Bianca: Trying to be an equalizer, the Minstrel needs to have an eye kept on him to prevent misdeeds.
Colin: And we're off! Convery attempting send Glass off the ropes, Glass reverses and spinebuster to start! Series of stomps now! Glass done with the stomping and onto the swinging! Convery gets launched! Convery tags Gentry in and Gentry with a quick jab to start. Gentry tries for another jab and Glass with the arm wringer flip! Going for the pin already!
1!
2!
Bianca: Gentry already getting to a 2, not a great sign. Glass with a sidewalk slam. Picking Gentry up t Go hit him with another, oh no Gentry reverses into a backbreaker! Possum pin by Glass, but Gentry up before a 1. Glass punishes him with a fist drop. Gentry grabbing Glass's arm and armbreaker! Gentry up and Polish Hammer to Glass! Glass tries to pull Gentry into a ripcord but gets a Magna Cutter for his troubles! Daria has Gentry's attention and it allows Glass to get up and nail Gentry with a running forearm. Float over neckbreaker by Glass! Glass hits Gentry with a Gory Bomb! Glass sends Gentry into the turnbuckle and tags in Payne, Glass sends Gentry off the ropes and launches him up! Payne catches him with the stunner! Realization of Defenestration! Into the pin...
1!
2!
3!
Manifestation of Defenestration win by pinfall with the Realization of Defenestration!
Ash: Here are your winners, Unrelenting Perry Payne and Unbreakable Gilbert Glass, The Manifestation of Defenestration!
Colin: And that was a pretty decisive victory! Perry Payne will have a chance at a repeat a little bit later on!
INT. BACKSTAGE - CONTINUOUS
DARIA DONNER walks back to her dressing room when she is confronted by MORGAN MAVERICK.
Daria: What do you want?
Morgan: Not what, who. And you know the answer to that.
Daria: Nope. I do not like what that did to me. We're not going there again.
Morgan: I'm fighting Kalpana later.
Daria: Oh good, two people I hate beating the hell out of each other. Move.
Daria tries to walk into the door and Morgan puts her arm up.
Morgan: Broadway would have offered to take care of her, make my match a little easier and then I'd have her back with Sugar Cooki. But, y'know, she's (checking nails and blowing on them) not able to make it today.
Daria: So you have to fight your own battles now, how sad for you.
Daria pushes Morgan's arm out of the way and enters the room.
Morgan: You can't run from the devil forever, Donner.
Daria: The devil is running from me. And you'd be wise to do the same.
Daria gives a little smile then shuts the door. Morgan huffs off.
INT. ARENA SECTION - CONTINUOUS
We return to Colin and Bianca.
W2 DAY 5
Bianca: And now we go into our Day 5, with Broadway Bloom out of the picture creating an x-factor in whomever will replace her.
Colin: And you can see it's already got Morgan Maverick a little spooked, and Daria Donner making an emphatic statement.
Bianca: Well, Bloom was supposed to fight in this first match, so we'll see what the plan is when we send it down to Ash.
Ash stands in the middle of the ring.
Ash: The following contest is scheduled for one fall and will count towards points in the Round Robin!
DNCE "Cake by the Ocean" cues up as a woman comes out fist pumping, occasionally alternating mixing a bowl. This is Sugar Cooki.
Ash: First! From the Jersey Shore, SUGAR COOKI! And now, for a special announcement. Broadway Bloom has been declared unable to continue to the W2 due to injury and so a new competitor will join the Round Robin!
Colin: Wait, so someone is going to fill in 5 days in? Are they just going to get her points?
Bianca: Yes, Colin, all 0 of them.
The lights flash green and yellow, as the guitar riff of The Go! Team "Junior Kickstart" begins. Once the brass hits HAZEL CLARKE runs out to loud cheers. She does a jumping split in mid air as yellow and green fireworks go off. She takes off towards the ring at full speed and then uses the momentum to do the same jumping split over the apron and ropes into the ring, culminating in a split and pointing upwards.
Colin: Holy crap! This changes the whole game! Hazel Clarke has entered the chat!
Ash: Her new opponent, from Port Maria, Jamaica, the Port Maria Platypus, HAAAAAZEL CLARKE!
The bell rings.
Bianca: The former college high jump champion, as you saw in the ring entrance, Hazel Clarke is a true five-point player, with intensity and tenacity far surpassing many wrestlers her age. Only 22 years old and she's already decorated both on the track and in the ring. Two time Ring the Belle Women's Champion. And here she goes, throwing a double spin kick combo that unbalances Sugar Cooki.
Colin: I gotta tell you, she was one of the reasons I was excited about this merger, and you can see in her speed she doesn't disappoint. Off the ropes, single leg dropkick! Back around, leaping clothesline! Sugar Cooki getting to her feet now and trying to get some momentum going, coming off the ropes and Trouble in Paradise! Going for the cover!
1!
2!
3!
Hazel Clarke wins by Pinfall with the Trouble in Paradise!
Ash: Here is your winner and awarded three points, Hazel Clarke!!
Colin: And she's everything that was promised. The speed was too much for Sugar Cooki to keep up with and she notches points right off the bat.
Bianca: This inserted a nice breath of fresh air into the proceedings for sure. But now we return to our regularly scheduled programming. Ash?
Ash: The following contest is scheduled for one fall and will count towards points in the Round Robin!
The Lights Go completely Out, then a Single Spotlight hits the Stage. Nightwish "Phantom of the Opera" cues up and Tragedeigh sweeps her arms up as if conducting the crescendo. The fans sing along. The spotlight follows her down the ramp as she keeps her arms open. She enters the ring and bows sweeping. The lights come on at this time.
Ash: First! From Edina, Minnesota, the Gen Z Dramaturge, TRAGEDEIGH!
Bianca: This is the most love I've seen a theater kid get in their hometown! Usually these are the kids that get beat up, but they love her.
Colin: It helps that she can also beat people up. She's notched an impressive three wins and is one of the people atop the leaderboard now.
The drum riff hits to the instrumental version of Nothing But Thieves "Trip Switch" hits as three lightning bolts shoot from an image of the Manx three-leg symbol done as gears. The lights give a flickering feeling, as if power surging. Tamara punches the ground then raises her arm slowly. Tamara walks down the ring, cracking her fists, all business. The crowd cheers, but she pays them no mind. She's all business. She enters the ring and punches the ground again, then slowly raises her shades off and gives the smallest of smiles.
Ash: And her opponent! From Onchan, Isle of Man, the Circuitbreaker, TAMARA RIVERS!
The bell rings.
Colin: Here we go! It's a battle of style vs substance here. Tragedeigh likes to add a flourish to all she does and make it more dramatic, a little pirouette before the roundhouse kick! Off the ropes, a little bow and a rolling wheel kick!
Bianca: We were just talking about this with Kalpana yesterday also against Tamara Rivers, how sometimes your leaning into doing too much can be a disadvantage when facing someone like Rivers, who's easily going to get annoyed by your antics and seek to shut you down in the most no-nonsense way possible.
Colin: And a moonsault press by Tragedeigh! She's certainly got the momentum going! But it wouldn't hurt her to try to stay on the ground a bit too, these aerial moves are good punctuations but keeping the pressure on is equally important. Ah, like this! Solid kick combo by Tragedeigh forcing Tamara Rivers back. The crowd is loving it. The Minnesota Marquee has the crowd eating out of her hand! And throwing Rivers off the ropes, another bow flourish as Rivers comes by and back body drop to Rivers! Rivers can't seem to get anything going. Tragedeigh with a hammer throw and Rivers goes over the edge and a rough tumble!
The crowd starts chanting "We want a poem!" Lily Martin starts the count
1!
Bianca: Is...is the crowd chanting for a poem? A wrestling crowd wants a poem?? What world do we live in?
Colin: Well, it seems a mic has been produced so we're getting one.
2!
Tragedeigh: I couldn't. Well, okay.
A woman come from Isle of Man
To win a match she had a plan
3!
Tragedeigh:
To Minnesota showed her face
but hark! She leaves here in disgrace
4!
Tragedeigh:
Her dreams to end me on this mat
As fictional as Gef the Rat
Colin: Oh no. She came for Gef the talking mongoose. That may have been a bridge too far. You can see the steam in Tamara's ears.
5!
Tragedeigh:
Such a shame, I was a fan
Of this woman from Isle of-
Bianca: Tamara ends storytime with a spear! And she's unloading fists upon fists on Tragedeigh! Something's broken in the Circuitbreaker! She's slamming Tragedeigh's head into the mat! Picks her up, Gutwrench Powerbomb! Deadlift Chokeslam! The mongoose has come to roost for Tragedeigh! Bulldog headlock, that can mean one of two things and IT'S THE WORSE ONE FOR TRAGEDEIGH MODDEY DHOOOOOO!!!! The pin!
1!
2!
3!
Tamara Rivers wins by pinfall with the Moddey Dhoo!
Ash: Here is your winner and awarded three points, the Circuitbreaker TAMARA RIVERS!
Tamara picks up the mic and leans into Tragedeigh's face.
Tamara: Was that fictional, kid? Was it? Keep Gef's name out of your mouth.
Tamara drops the mic by Tragedeigh and walks out. Ash picks it up.
Ash: The following contest is scheduled for one fall and will count towards points in the Round Robin!
The arena lights create an effect as if in stained glass. The instrumental version of "CASTLE OF GLASS" by Linkin Park starts to play. The colors in this stained glass effect rotate around the arena. When the drums of the song hit, Perry punches the air three times with quick firework blasts to cheers from the crowd. Perry pounds the fists of some fans as he walks down the ramp, then slams his fist on the apron three times and lets out a scream before sliding in the rings and putting his hands in a square and smashing his head through them.
Ash: First, From Corning, New York, weighing 246 pounds, "Unrelenting" Perry Payne!
Stantough "Industry Baby" plays as Landon Gentry walks out marching briskly and sticking up his nose at the audience.
Ash: And his opponent, from Scunthorpe, England, weighing in at 200 pounds, Landon Gentry!
The bell rings.
Bianca: And Perry's already pinned Gentry once today, both men seem to be primed for a fight. Perry drills Gentry with a running spinebuster. Perry hits Gentry with an inverted suplex, and rolling up to a crossface! Gentry reaching out to ropes, Perry lets go. Arm wringer flip and dropkick by Perry! Inverted front slam by Perry! Perry goes up onto the top rope and moonsault splash into a double knee strike! Top Rope Akneeler! Goes for the pin.
1!
2!
3!
Colin: Guess Gentry wasn't ready after all!
Perry Payne wins by Pinfall with the Akneeler!
Ash: Here is your winner and awarded three points, Unrelenting Perry Payne!
Bianca: If you have to fight two matches in one day, and still have to come back and fight for the next few, it's good to keep the matches as quick as you can. A dominant showing by Perry Payne here.
Colin: Here comes another man who had to fight earlier today and now he's going up against the champ. To the friends and family of Craig Convery-
Bianca: Preparing the Dear John already?
Ash stands in the ring.
Ash: The following contest is scheduled for one fall and will count towards points in the Round Robin!
A man in a Crash Test themed suit with crash test symbol face paint and crash helmet, and carrying a dummy as Primitives “Crash” plays. This is “Crash Course” Craig Convery who runs to the ring while shaking the dummy and then running headfirst into the ring apron, acting dazed, and then telling the dummy to wait for him before getting into the ring.
Ash: First! From Detroit, Michigan, weighing in at 211 pounds, Crash Course Craig Convery!
The lights go out, and we hear the yell of "SCHMETTERLIIIIIIING" and the crowd goes nuts as Schmetterling walks out to Rammstein "Mein Herz Brennt" with a mini flamethrower that he shoots in the sky whenever "BRENNT" is yelled.
Ash: And his opponent, from Mellrichstadt, Germany, weighing in at 219 pounds, the MAWL Champion, SCHMETTERLIIIIIIING!
The bell rings.
Bianca: And Schmetterling in already with a quick series of hammering punches! Convery tries to go blow for blow with him and each of them with the lariat! Kip up by Schmetterling and he's got Convery by the legs....BIG SWING! Convery off the ropes now and jumping float-over neckbreaker! Schmetterling rolls back up and standing dropkick. Schmetterling hits a solid sidewalk slam. Convery up and hasn't lost that look of rabid excitement.
Colin: He's like a cute rabid puppy, but one who pees on the wood floor and splashes in it like a puddle. Grapples Schmetterling and vertical brainbuster! Mounted punches, throwing some headbutts in there for good measure!
Bianca: Doesn't anyone realize that headbutting Schmetterling is a BAD idea?
Colin: I don't think it's registered that a metal mask does not a good headbutting target make but Convery seems to be no more dazed than usual. Convery trying to remove the mask now and THAT seems more like a mistake. Alternately trying to get his fingers in Schmetterling's mouth. I think he's trying for a mandible claw! He uses this move sometimes but this doesn't seem like a good time for it.
Bianca: Schmetterling seems to be flailing a bit with his arms, I don't think he was expecting this line of attack but as we've said Convery is not one you typically have expectations with. And it looks like Convery's got his fingers in BUT A YELP DID SCHMETTERLING BITE HIS FINGERS? Schmetterling keeping Convery's fingers in his mouth and rolling him over, a no hands armbar situation, this is a bizarre move, but it appears to be paying off as Convery yanks his hand out from behind the mask.
Colin: Schmetterling with a finger-lock now on the bitten hand, Convery looks like he's in pain! And just hammering away on that arm while keeping the fingers locked! Convery trying to get some momentum on his free arm, STOMPS SCHMETTERLING'S FOOT AND left hook to the side of the head! Convery is free! He comes off the ropes like a bat out of hell, going for a Head-On Collision, Schmetterling sidesteps him and boot to the side of the head! Crash Course is spinning out of control! Grabs Convery's waist, REISEN! Convery bounces onto his shoulder blades and rises back up and THERE'S the Head-On! Schmetterling stumbling a bit, Crash Course charges him again and Schmetterling side steps him and directs him right out of the ring! Schmetterling comes out as well!
1!
Colin: Schmetterling body slams Crash Course onto the extra announcer's table! Hey! That's our backup if we need to move.
2!
Bianca: Schmetterling doesn't seem to care, he's going up onto the table as well.
3!
Colin: This is one of those things that somehow doesn't count as a disqualification, like throwing someone into the ring steps...BUTTERFLY POWERBOMB!
4!
Colin: Well, we'll have to hope this table holds I guess. Throws Convery into the ring, goes for the pin.
1!
2!
3!
Schmetterling wins by Pinfall with the Butterfly Powerbomb through the backup announcer's table!
Ash: Here is your winner and awarded three points, SCHMETTERLING!!
Colin: And all is right with the world, the Champ had a rough go of it yesterday but has come back and broken his .500.
INT. BACKSTAGE - CONTINUOUS
Irving Barth stands with Greg Arias.
Irving: Greg Arias, it's been quite an eventful week for you, and today get your shot at the man who cost you one of your matches.
Greg: Yeah man you know, it's great to be here, and be part of this amazing event, brother, you know what I'm sayin'? And the big man's gonna come across some Big Boise Energy and it's gonna be a good time all around.
Irving: There are some who are saying that he's undefeatable, between four contenders so far only one's gotten any moves on him.
Greg: Hey you know that's the thing right? Cause like I know I'm goin up against a big challenge so I'm just gonna do what I do and get as far as I'm gonna get, y'know there's a whole tournament and I know I can't win em all but I'm gonna get out there and just do my thing. And Rade my man you know we got a whole ring and a setup for you to get your anger out, you don't need to be releasin' it like that my dude. Much love and I'll see you out there. And hey Irving. Don't let none of these dudes kill your vibe. Cool to see ya tryin' my dude.
Greg pats Irving on the back and walks away. Irving smiles.
Irving: Thanks Greg. Back to you all out there.
INT. ARENA SECTION - CONTINUOUS
Colin and Bianca sit at their desk.
Bianca: See, that's how you're supposed to treat Irving. Greg's kindness is not some character, that's just who he is.
Ash is in the middle of the ring.
Ash: The following contest is scheduled for one fall and counts towards points in the Round Robin!
Hozier "Too Sweet" plays as Cindy Sweet walks out giving fans high fives and the nWo too sweet finger bumps.
Ash: First, from San Diego, California, Cindy Sweet!
The lights go green and the projection of a giant eye illuminates the ramp. "Under My Umbrella" by Incubus plays as Iris Correa walks out in her scrubs and high-fives audience members.
And her opponent, from Denver, Colorado, "the Eye-Con" Iris Correa!
The bell rings.
Bianca: And the bill rings and we're off! Iris throws Cindy Sweet towards the ropes and rebound hurricanrana! Sweet quick to get back up and throwing hook punches! Cindy has had a good run these past few days after her initial loss, building up a win streak.
Colin: Her partner, Taylor, on the other hand can't seem to get a win going. Cindy clearly the strong link on the team as she rolls over the back of Iris and catches her with a jumping high knee. Takedown and punches by Sweet, Correa gets her off with the Monkey Flip and elbow drop to the head! Off the ropes, leg drop! Picks Cindy up into a Torture Rack! Cindy struggling, but kicking the back of Correa and swinging herself back around to a Bulldog! Correa goes down and Cindy Sweet with a standing moonsault into the pin!
1!
Bianca: Iris gets the shoulder up at 1, a 1-2 punch to Cindy's head and she's up off her. Iris with a hatch suplex! Iris pulls Cindy up into a Bitter End! Cindy rolls out of the ring to catch her breath.
1!
Colin: Cindy has been dominant her past few matches and is trying to strategize on how to get the best of Iris. Pacing the ringside a bit.
2!
Bianca: Trying to get around Iris, finding a spot in her blind spot, up she goes on the rope springboards INTO A SUPERKICK!
Colin: There's no blind spot when you're an optometrist.
Bianca: Goddammit.
Colin: Iris gets herself into a corner, getting the crowd into a clap, Cindy up a bit and Iris goes for the run, the overhead leap, CINDY GRABS THE LEGS AND ALABAMA SLAM! Iris did not prepare for that. Cindy trying to get the legs up into an anchor lock, Iris kicking away and rolls, creates some distance and jumps up to a 360* Double Knee Facebuster it's her new move she calls it the 20/20 and Cindy is down! Iris with the cover...
1!
2!
3!
Iris Correa wins by Pinfall with the 20/20!
Ash: Here is your winner and awarded three points, the Eye-Con, IRIS CORREA!
Colin: You can hear the fans are starting to buy into Iris! She fought the last two matches clean and this time she succeeded.
Iris Correa high fives the fans as she leaves.
Colin: And we saw earlier, that Morgan Maverick was hoping to pull the devil back out of Daria to give her an advantage in this next match and Daria refused, so now Maverick is coming face to face with Kalpana. Going down to Ash to ring it in.
Ash stands in the ring.
Ash: The following contest is scheduled for one fall and will count towards points in the Round Robin!
"Freedom" by Nepali band Sparkle rocks through the speakers as the lights go dark blue and the lights approximate a planetarium laser show. Kalpana does a flip into Spiderman pose on the stage, then runs down the ramp and springboards into a flip over the rope into the Spiderman pose.
Ash: First, from Inaruwa, Nepal, the Innovator of Inaruwa, KALPANA!
GoGoGadjet "No One Likes Us/Fly Eagles Fly Remix" plays. The crowd boos Morgan Maverick, who flicks her hair onstage and struts out, occasionally simultaneously blowing kisses and flipping off the audience. Kalpana keeps her eye squarely on Morgan. A cloaked figure sneaks behind everyone in the ring.
Ash: And her opponent, from Philadelphia, Pennsylvania, Mor-
Ash is cut off by a crack of a guitar across Kalpana's back. The masked figure scoots out of the ring before anyone can see and Lily Martin calls for the bell.
Kalpana wins by disqualification!
Ash: Here is your winner by disqualification and awarded three points, KALPANA!
Colin: Well, Morgan Maverick got the help she wanted, just very delayed.
Bianca: And it backfired on her.
Colin: Well, we didn't get to see who the attacker was. But there are some pretty educated guesses.
Bianca: Well, Ash looks ready to move on so let's do it.
Ash stands in the middle of the ring.
Ash: The following contest is scheduled for one fall and will count towards points in the Round Robin!
The mall turns into a full on dance floor with smoke machine and laser show as Deorro Feat. Elvis Crespo "Baillar" plays. The audience engages in the dancing and out comes Neon Juan busting various moves. He grinds, flexes his abs at various members of the audience and flirts with anyone of an adult age as he walks down the arena. He smells of intense cologne. He uses the turnbuckle pole as a dancer pole for a moment then shakes his chest on the top turnbuckle as he takes off his vest.
Ash: First, from La Santa, Mexico, weighing 235 pounds, El Divertido, Neon Juan Guyverno!
The next man comes out to pink lights with little projections of sprinkles to the ring, with a donut painted on his chest and offering donuts to people, to the song System of a Down "Sugar". This is Sprinkl.
Ash: And his opponent, from Boston, Massachusetts, weighing in at 211 pounds, SPRINKL!
The bell rings.
Bianca: And these two are not wrestlers to sleep on. Or with. Sprinkl throwing fists right off the bat on Neon Juan, rights and lefts abounding and a headlock into a Northern Lights suplex. Sprinkl getting him into a headlock armbar and Juan shimmies and slides his way out!
Colin: Being well-oiled has its benefits! Juan hits a spinning wheel kick! Rolling over Sprinkl and roundhouse kick from the other side! Sprinkl staggers back and gives an opening for Juan to nail an axe kick! Juan shimmying a bit, just rubbing it in the face of Sprinkl, throws Sprinkl off the ropes and hits him with a rebound handstand headscissors! Sprinkl tries to stop the skid of his landing and going for a float-over DDT! Lands it! Juan down for only a moment and back on his feet with a single-leg dropkick to Sprinkl. Sprinkl stutters back and Juan backs up, coming up for a headscissors and SPRINKL CATCHES HIS LEGS! SPRINKL SETTING JUAN DOWN FOR THE BOSTON CRAB, BENDING HIM BACK AND JUAN REVERSES IT INTO A VICTORY ROLL!
1
Bianca: Sprinkl gets his shoulder up, Juan kicks him in the side on his way up, Juan off the ropes and Sprinkl attempts to catch him in a lariat but Juan flips over Sprinkl, coming back around and trying for the tornado DDT but Sprinkl catches him up into a suplex but Juan slides behind him and going for the Poison Rana NO Sprinkl has his legs and is going for an Alabama Slam HOW DID JUAN GET HIS HANDS ON THE ROPES and now he sends Sprinkl to the outside with the power of his legs and immediately an Arabian Press Moonsault coming down after Sprinkl! That was a hell of an exchange, Colin!
1!
Colin: Sprinkl and Neon Juan exchanging fists on the outside! Going blow for blow! Neon Juan whips Sprinkl into the barricade!
2!
Bianca: I really hope they leave our poor table alone. Juan whips Sprinkl into the crowd now!
3!
Colin: Where the hell is that dance music coming from?
Bianca: I don't know, the mall speakers I guess? But he has a bunch of people around him dancing! Never a good sign when you lose your fighters!
4!
Bianca: I can't see what's happening, but I can hear clear as day that there's a count going on.
5!
Colin: Wait, here comes Juan! But where's Sprinkl?
Bianca: Well, Juan is missing one of his glow bracelets if that gives us any indication.
6!
Colin: Juan is signaling for the music to come back on! And he's going to grace us with a dance!
7!
Bianca: Did he pay the sound guy? This is nuts. He's got moves though.
8!
Colin: Wait, I think I see movement in the crowd. Is Sprinkl stirring?
9!
Bianca: He is! And he's going to have to hurry to beat the count!
Colin: Rushing and he...stumbled over the barricade. It's like when Orpheus looked back.
10!
Neon Juan Guyverno wins by countout!
Ash: Here is your winner and awarded three points, Neon Juan Guyverno!
Bianca: A win is a win is a win.
INT. BACKSTAGE AREA - CONTINUOUS
Emma Janeer is helping Kalpana ice up when they see Daria Donner walking by.
Emma: Are you happy with yourself, you psycho?
Daria: What are you talking about.
Emma: Oh don't play dumb. You've had it out for Kal since the beginning. Nice touch on the robe, though. Really hid it super well.
Daria: Oh you got attacked. You poor thing.
Kalpana: Oh shove it.
Daria: Seriously though. It wasn't me. Morgan asked me to do it earlier and I told her n-
Morgan Maverick walks in.
Morgan: Hey bestie, saw you came through after all, little note...do it before the match next time, so I don't lose points. Love you!
Daria: But I-
Kalpana: You want so hard to be seen as the good guy and you've been on me since Day 1.
Daria: Okay, EXCUSE ME, I made one bad off-handed comment about Nepal and my bad but if we check the tape you attacked me, girlie. In the bar and in the ring. And then the next day you came out to root for this one against me. Yeah I went nuts on y'all on my devil trip but you kinda pushed me there if I recall. But not ONCE outside of my devil days have I ever attacked you first. You created this rivalry between us in your head and made it real.
Emma: And you expect us to believe that you're just all better. You took off a barrette and you've seen the light and that's it.
Daria: I don't care what you believe, Magic Queefdom, because this doesn't concern you. This is between me and her for some reason.
Morgan: And me too!
Emma: Kal is my friend, and we fight for the light.
Daria: Kiddo, one bad day and that light goes out so fast. Any one of us can go good or bad. Any one of us can have a bad day. Don't kid yourself. Anyway, I didn't do it. You could look at any one of us competitors. How do we know you didn't do it, Janeer, in order to continue to play little nursie to wounded bird?
Emma: I wouldn't hurt my friend like that.
Daria: (starting to get meaner, not realizing it) You're so sweet but so naive to the ways of the world. You realize that in 5 days time you two have to fight, right? And that you're both hypothetically possibly tournament bound? What are you going to do then? Sit outside and have a little tea party and get double counted out so no one will hurt your little feelings? Anyway. I. Didn't. Do. It. It could have been one of the people not competing, seeing that Hazel Clarke got in and trying to get a spot for themselves.
Morgan: Yes! Yes! Let it out.
Daria: You could look at literally any of the 10 people not involved in that match. You could look at Clarke. You could look at Tragedeigh, she enjoys the dramatic. You could look at Zora Luthor. You could look at Sugar Cooki. Hell, you could look at Cindy Sweet, she's been getting rougher.
Cindy Sweet sticks her head out of the locker room.
Cindy: Leave me out of whatever this is.
Taylor Tekk also sticks his head out. It's clear he's panting a little bit.
Taylor: I can vouch for Cindy, we've been working out all day.
Cindy: Which you need to get back to.
Taylor: But-!
Cindy: You haven't won a match this whole time. It's getting bad. Get back in there.
Taylor sighs a bit but they go back into the room.
Daria: Okay so maybe they're out but you have soooo many people in this federation that you could be looking at but you're obsessed with me and it's weird.
Daria is getting nastier as this goes, and doesn't realize she's taken out the devil horn barrette.
Daria: Weird isn't even the way to put it. Sad. Pathetic. Tragic. You realize you've been running your annoying little mouth at everyone and anyone here. You think you're invincible cause you're going up to MAWL and you may not even make it there if you keep making enemies like this. But you know what, I wish I had attacked. I wish I had accepted Morgan's offer earlier.
Daria: Because I'm getting all of the blame of wrecking you without any of the joy of having done it. Guess what bitches, tomorrow that changes. Come on, bestie, let's leave these wispy little virgin sacrifices until tomorrow.
Daria cackles and Morgan cheers to herself, as they throw their heads up arrogantly and leave.
INT. ARENA SECTION - CONTINUOUS
Bianca and Colin sit in the ring.
Bianca: Well, it looks like Morgan's goal of bringing the devil out worked and things are patched up with the Noreaster.
Colin: I'm not sure how Broadway's gonna feel about this when she returns. If Daria even stays with the team that long.
Bianca: I'm not sure how Iris Correa's going to feel about this, she vouched for Daria Donner and this is a spit in the face.
Colin: It's clear that Daria Donner is dealing with an internal battle, and we're going to be at the mercy of whichever side is winning. Speaking of don't know feelings, I don't know how Taylor Tekk is going to feel after that workout. Sounds like it was pretty intense and may be going until he gets out here.
Bianca: Cindy Sweet was right though in that he's sitting on that goose egg, and it's getting a bit laughable. Well, down to Ash to see if the workout paid off.
Ash stands in the ring.
Ash: The following contest is scheduled for one fall.
Habitually Henry "Capybara" plays as Capybara pops up and down in the audience before flipping into the ring.
Ash: First! From Bang Phra, Thailand, weighing 201 pounds, CAPYBARA!
Dandy Warhols "Scientist" plays and Taylor Tekk walks out, it's clear he's exhausted from the workout.
!
Ash: And his opponent. From San Diego, California, weighing in at 195 pounds, the Modern Magician, Taylor Tekk!
The bell rings. Capybara locks in the Capybara Hug/Spinning Bear Hug, and Tekk collapses in his arms. Lily Martin raises his arm three times and it drops. She calls for the bell.
Capybara wins by Submission with the Capybara Hug!
Ash: Here is your winner and awarded three points, Capybara!
Bianca: That was just embarrassing.
Colin: Cindy is sure going to be pissed about it. All that work they did.
Bianca: And I've just received word that Zora Luthor has convinced Daria Donner to let her go first. Not sure what the meaning of this is, but Ash hasn't even left the ring so let's throw it down.
Ash: The following contest is scheduled for one fall and will count towards points in the Round Robin!
The lights go blue and sparkly, the instrumental version of "Going the Distance" from Hercules plays and the tron around Emma shows the Cinderella castle with fireworks in the tron. Emma sashays in. She puts the Minnie glasses on a fan and waves to the crowd as she enters the ring.
Ash: First, from Celebration, Florida, the Powerslam Princess, Emma Janeer!
A video of a helicopter plays as Yeah Yeah Yeahs "Rich" plays over the loudspeaker. Zora Luthor struts out in her suit and shades, and holds her business suit as she walks to the ring. She wipes her feet on the apron then steps into the ring.
Ash: And her opponent, from Wall Street, the Corporate Corrupter, Zora Luthor!
The bell rings.
Colin: And Luthor actually ready to fight this time. She squares up with Emma. Emma throws her off the ropes, catches her with a Spinebuster! Emma picks her up with a scoop slam! Emma Janeer considers herself the fighter for the light, and she's certainly going up one of the darker hearts in this federation. And she truly believes that good triumphs over evil, and that conviction drives her in all she does.
Bianca: It's a cute sentiment, Colin, but I do fear that sometimes evil triumphs over good. I mean, look at Rade, who currently has the only undefeated streak in the tournament. Look at Neon Juan who has won two matches now with his neon knuckles. Daria may have taken a turn but she is right about one thing, it takes one bad day.
Colin: And Emma is unloading on Zora with some fists, trying I guess to get her frustration out about what's been happening with her friend Kalpana. And Zora with the monkey flip getting Emma off her. Zora now with a stomp, getting all the major zones, and a judo flip from the down position. She hits Emma with a European Uppercut and follows up with a Russian Legsweep! Emma grounded for a second but fights her way to her feet and running back elbow! Emma catches Zora with a kippou kick! Off the ropes and a missile dropkick! Zora up, Emma goes for a running crossbody but reversed into a Michinoku Driver!
Bianca: Zora goes for the pin-
1!
Bianca: Emma kicks up but it seems she expected her to and is unbothered. Zora tries to go for the Eat Defeet or as she calls it the Pink Slip, but Emma reverses it into a piledriver! Whatever plan Zora thought she had in going first doesn't seem to be panning out! Emma picks Zora up and over to the corner now, she's pulling her up it looks like a Magic Carpet Ride is coming but Zora pushes her over the turnbuckle and out of the ring! And now she's...reaching into her outfit and pulling out...money? What's...oh no.
Bianca: Zora Luthor has just added Lily Martin to her payroll! We thought that Lily Martin was incorruptible, and she has proven that very much to not be the case! Lily why?
Colin: Zora Luthor pointing to the sky now, and to the ramp...this must be what she was talking about to Daria! Oh no....Daria and Morgan are here!
Colin: Where, where the hell is Leila Blake?
Bianca: Last I heard she got in a limo to go to a meeting. But the driver looked suspiciously like Jenkins. Which I don't think she realized.
Colin: Oh great. Well, Daria and Morgan are absolutely decimating Emma Janeer with chairs outside and Lily and Zora are just watching and laughing! They throw Emma Janeer inside and lift Emma up...WAIT! ZORA IS JOINING IN....DOUBLE WAIT LILY MARTIN IS ALSO JOINING IN! IT'S A 4-PERSON POWERBOMB! DEVASTATION IN SPADES! ZORA PLACES HER FOOT ON EMMA!
1-2-3!
Zora Luthor wins by Pinfall after 4-Person Powerbomb!
Ash: Here is your winner and awarded three points, Zora Luthor!
Lily: Do you still think good triumphs over evil, Emma?
Zora shoves some money in Emma's leotard strap. Morgan carries Zora out and backstage.
Daria: The Noreaster is back, baby, and we've got an investor now. And an official. Morg babe, bring out the next victim.
Morgan Maverick returns dragging Kira Dain out. Morgan brings her into the ring, then starts to lift her up. Daria, Zora, and Lily join in the lifting then drive her to the ground. Daria does a recumbent model pose over Kira and Lily quick counts 1-2-3!
Delaware Devil Daria Donner wins by Pinfall with the four-person Powerbomb!
Ash: (clearly unhappy) Here is your winner and awarded three points, Delaware Devil Daria Donner.
Zora: Have fun, Lily.
Zora, Daria, and Morgan leave.
Bianca: And you can hear the deflation in Ash's voice. I don't blame her. There's a bit of pall over this W2. And now we know that Lily is willing to set fire to the rules, and Leila Blake is being driven off to God knows where...the best thing I can say folks is that we have two matches remaining, and tomorrow's a new day. I love chaos, but this is wild.
Colin: I agree, Bianca, let's make it through these next two matches. I really don't know what else we can handle today. I'm not even sure at this point I want to know the robed identity today.
Bianca: Ash?
Ash: The following contest is scheduled for one fall and will count towards points in the Round Robin!
The arena lights create an effect as if in stained glass. The instrumental version of "CASTLE OF GLASS" by Linkin Park starts to play. The colors in this stained glass effect rotate around the arena. When the drums of the song hit, Gilbert holds his hands up in a square and mimics looking through it, before breaking the signal with his head and screaming to cheers. He runs into the ring and does the square smash again.
Ash: First, from Neenah, Wisconsin, weighing in at 291 pounds, "Unbreakable" Gilbert Glass!
Bianca: Brave of Gilbert to walk out here without Perry, now that there are no real rules for the rest of the night.
Colin: Agreed. I do think Perry is in the wings though, just in case. Protecting him from the back.
“D is for Dangerous” by Arctic Monkeys plays as Dangerous Johnny Dagger walks out running and aggressively pointing at the audience.
Ash: And, from Kill Devil Hills, North Carolina weighing in at 202 lbs, Dangerous Johnny Dagger!
The bell rings. The two lock up and it's a back and forth.
Bianca: And Dagger is himself a tale of two men, on one hand besting Arias to get that title match and on the other hand hasn't been able to notch a win in the Round Robin.
Colin: To be fair, one of those matches was pre-empted by the man in our last match of the night. But yes, Dagger is running a deficit here. Let's see if he can change that, the lock-up finally has a resolution as Gilbert is able to get a vertical brainbuster on Dagger! Gilbert scoops Dagger up with a slam and gets in a headlock. Dagger starting to fight out of it and gets himself up, elbow to the gut, off the ropes and spinning wheel kick! Dagger off the ropes with a snapmare then back around for a dropkick! Dagger keeping the pressure on now with a series of quick kicks and Gilbert is having a hard time. Dagger keeping Gilbert down and going for the standing shooting star and GILBERT GETS THE KNEES UP! DAGGER STYMIED.
Bianca: Gilbert now throwing haymakers and throwing Dagger off the ropes, stiff punch staggers Dagger! Chickenwing locked in. Dagger fighting to get out of the hold and to the ropes now, and flips himself over into an Operation Dragon! And Lily taking her time to get to the count.
1.
Colin: Glass is up. I get interfering when you're paid, but what's the point of slanting on this match?
Bianca: Do you know the story of Pandora's box, Colin?
Colin: I mean, I guess.
Bianca: Lily has been so tightly wound with the rules that Zora opening that box has popped all of these baser instincts out. Lily is now stretching out her power in ways she'd never allowed herself to before.
Colin: So what does that mean for this match? Neither of these people tend to play in a way that would give her a leaning.
Bianca: That's a good question, and I guess we'll have to wait and see.
Colin: Glass with another series of haymakers and Dagger getting backed into a corner! Literally backed into a corner! Glass lighting him up on the turnbuckle. 1! 2! 3! 4! 5! 6! 7! 8! 9! 10!
Bianca: Backing up and going for the forearm, Dagger jumps the rope and Glass hits the empty turnbuckle. Dagger up on the turnbuckle and going for the somerset dropkick GLASS CATCHES INTO A POWERBOMB!
Colin: Glass is locking into a Boston Crab! And WHAT THE HELL IS JOLLY DOING HERE!
Colin: Jolly hands Lily a bag! She looks in and shakes it and motions "Go ahead!" JOLLY HITS GILBERT WITH THE LUTE! Gilbert goes down and Dagger is rolled into a pin!
1!
2!
3!
Dangerous Johnny Dagger wins by Pinfall after a Lute Attack!
Ash: Here is your winner and awarded three points, DANGEROUS JOHNNY DAGGER!
Bianca: I'm not sure Dagger's even aware he won. But he's up now and he doesn't look happy about it!
Colin: It's his first win in the round robin and through no awareness or choice of his own it was gotten ill-gained. He's giving chase to Jolly and Gilbert Glass is getting to his feet too, totally at a loss, oh I really hope tomorrow gives us more actual wins.
Ash: The final contest is scheduled for one fall and is for points in the Round Robin!
The lights are black. Like black black. "Mitternacht" by e nomine plays and all that can be seen is the smiley faces which also glow on the poles facing into the ring. Once Rade gets into the ring he closes his hands around his face to cover the mask and the lights go on.
Ash: First, from deep in the Black Forest, weighing in at 355 pounds, Der Blutsammler, RADE!
A cheerful man engages the crowd in a slow "wave your hands in the air" to the tune of Trik Turner "Friends and Family" as he walks to the ring. This is Greg Arias.
Ash: And, his opponent, from Boise, Idaho, weighing in at 301 pounds, Good Dude Greg Arias!
The bell rings.
Bianca: And Greg Arias is the next sacrifice it looks like, this time was bound to come with them both in the Round Robin but it hurts to know what's coming all the same.
Colin: Sure enough, Greg thrown off the ropes, Rade gets him by the neck, up he goes and WAIT GREG COMES DOWN WITH A DOUBLE AXE HANDLE! GREG ARIAS REVERSES THE 7 FEET UNDER! WE HAVE A MATCH!
Bianca: Greg throwing body blows now, Rade looks stunned that he actually has to fight, Greg thinking about running but stops himself and LIFTS UP THE BIG MAN! FIREMAN'S CARRY! RADE ACTUALLY TASTES GROUND FOR THE FIRST TIME! WILL GREG ARIAS BE THE ANSWER WE'VE BEEN SEEKING!
Colin: Rade up on his feet, picks Arias up in a military press and he's turning his head upwards, GREG SLIDES OUT AND AVOIDS THE RED MIST! Backstabber by Arias! Rade is trying to end this way too quickly, and Arias seems to know the tricks. Up on the turnbuckle and a solid frog splash down! Rade actually oofs! Goes for the pin. Lily taking her sweet time to get there.
1.
Bianca: Rade launches Arias up off him! I think you have to buy Lily's pins now, and that's adding a whole other layer of problems here. Arias undeterred, not even annoyed at Lily or at least not showing it, single leg dropkick with his right leg! Knee strike with his left leg! Roundhouse with the right! Rade picks him up and back body drop! Greg over the ropes now! A bit of a tumble on the landing, but Arias once again is ready to go. Gets himself on the apron and hits Rade with a shoulder tackle. Rade picks him up for a release bodyslam! And down comes the big foot on Greg's chest, and oh that's 355 pounds of weight now on Greg's sternum.
Colin: Many of our competitors are about 100 pounds off of Rade if not more but Greg is only 54. That would likely kill Taylor Tekk but Arias is just having a bit of agita. Greg rolls to the back of Rade and German Suplex! The big man is down! Greg Arias going up to the top turnbuckle, does a quick hearty chuckle...I think we maybe getting the HilArias! WAIT THE HOODED FIGURE IS BACK! SPRAYING GREG WITH BLOOD MIST! Greg loses his footing and is off the turnbuckle! Rade throws him all the way up and THERE'S the 7 feet under chokeslam! Planted with one hand!
1! 2! 3!
Rade wins by Pinfall with the 7 Feet Under!
Ash: Here is your winner and awarded three points, Der Blutsammler, RADE!
Bianca: Why would Daria help Rade? Is she that into the Devil theme now?
Colin: I...I don't think the hooded figure is Daria, Bianca. Daria is currently in Jenkins' Limo with the rest of Noreaster, no word on what they did with Leila Blake, but she's not with them.
Bianca: But then who?
The hooded figure enters the ring as Rade spits up his blood mist in victory. The hooded figure extends their hands to bask in the rain, then drops the hood to reveal themselves as...
Colin: ANN?? ANN LEE???
Bianca: We were wondering what has been going on with Ann Lee, and now we know...she's been baptized in blood!
Ann Lee smiles darkly as she holds up a mic.
Ann: Now...collect. The blood.
Bianca: Rade picks up Arias. No! NO! Rade slamming his mask into Arias's head over. And over. And picking up speed! He's busted Arias open! He's still going! This must have been what Ann was saying about being incomplete and the blood collector and...wow. Wow.
Colin: This is terrible! We've lost Lily Martin AND Ann Lee!
Bianca: Well, I'm Bianca Diaz...
Colin: And I'm Colin McRae...hopefully this brutal scene can end soon, and we'll see you tomorrow.
Rade continues to bludgeon Greg Arias with his head as Ann Lee laughs maniacally up until we...
FADE TO BLACK.
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